MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

217Fucked!

MrSassypantsMrSassypants
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 34282
  • Number of comments : 2310
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : Hello there! My, oh my, don't you look good today!? Dang, male/female/human/alien/4thDimensional creature visiting my profile, you look stunning!

Anyways, my name is Kevin, and I use this app when I am bored, meaning all the time so I'm online often.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 19. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - 14 hours ago<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 10:32pm<b>NostalgiaFreak9</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 1:27pm<b>samsterling</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 8:14pm<b>anormalperson</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 4:37pm<b>Tymaster5</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 4:59pm<b>ima_rock</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 1:25am<b>burgermike92</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 12:03am<b>u_mad_bro</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 6:13pm<b>weedle99</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 4:39pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 3:16am<b>andrmac</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 10:58am<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 1:32am<b>Hazel515</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 12:42am<b>dizzyable</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 8:01am<b>eski2015</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 1:33pm<b>crharding</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 5:11am<b>EvilPandaxD</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 4:08am

Fucked!<b>ima_rock</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 7:25am<b>eski2015</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 3:47am<b>Lonelychick1249</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 3:21pm<b>Skydiver2001</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 11:26pm<b>kitkatjoy_96</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 4:16am<b>BrainEaters</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 7:48am<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 9:46am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 5:02pm<b>FujisakiChihiro</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 3:50am<b>turtles_yup</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 3:15pm<b>TheMike23</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 11:27pm<b>MrGodface</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 12:57am<b>AwesomeRPGDigo</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 9:51pm<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 4:29pm<b>marvelvsdc</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 5:31am<b>DeishaW</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 6:58am<b>hersheykisses511</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 4:49am<b>samsterling</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 5:11pm

MrSassypants's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom refused to sign me up for a CPR class, reasoning that if I was ever put in a situation where a person was choking, I could save them using my "common sense" and "intellect". I need the class to graduate. FML

by blob / 02/20/2013 at 7:32pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my upstairs neighbor has a cat. I was blessed with this knowledge when she threw several piles of used kitty litter and cat poop over her balcony and onto my patio. FML

by Anonymous / 02/16/2013 at 7:43pm / Finland (Southern Finland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the market to buy some groceries. Before I got even half-way home, a guy stormed toward me, pulled what looked like a knife, and chased me around the block while screaming that he'd kill me for sleeping with his wife. Nope, still a 15-year-old virgin here. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2013 at 4:50pm / Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2013 at 5:38pm / United Kingdom (Havering) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing Slender, when I caught a glimpse of the Slenderman. I jumped in my chair, letting rip a huge fart in the process. Nobody heard it, but only because my shrieks of terror drowned out the sound. FML

by theydidsmellitthough / 02/08/2013 at 4:59pm / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2013 at 4:20pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went and bought lunch for all the people I work with. The only meal the place forgot was mine. FML

by me / 01/22/2013 at 1:49pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I asked him to make me some coffee too. When he brought me my drink, I took a sip, and realized he'd poured salt in it. As I gagged, he muttered, "Next time, make it yourself." FML

by megean c.l. / 01/20/2013 at 4:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of three days met up with me at the movie theater, sporting a crude tattoo of my face on his cheek, along with a love heart and the word "forever." Looks like I'm single again. FML

by maybe dead in a day / 01/20/2013 at 2:28pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, after hours of trying to put a screaming baby to sleep, she finally fell asleep in my arms. I was so happy. Then, I got the hiccups. FML

by hiccups / 01/13/2013 at 1:15am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, my husband suggested a way for us to "make some money" off our pregnancy. His great idea? Pregnancy porn. FML

by Anonymous / 01/13/2013 at 12:27am / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my dad, thinking it was an advertisement, threw away a letter from the college I applied to. FML

by gdog10122 / 01/12/2013 at 4:52am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at the reading of my mother's last will and testament, I found out that despite having cared for her for the final years of her life, she denied me an inheritance. She basically said I'm an embarrassment, because when she wrote it, I was 31 years old, with no wife or children. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2013 at 4:35pm / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, after 3 years with my dream girl, I decided to pop the question by making her complete a scavenger hunt ending in her finding me, suit and everything, by the park bench where we had our first kiss. She came home tired and, instead of following the clues, decided to watch TV all day. FML

by ItRainedOutside / 01/06/2013 at 3:49am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

by Raela / 01/04/2013 at 11:59am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids