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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

113Fucked!

MrSassypantsMrSassypants
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 25958
  • Number of comments : 2076
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : Hello there! My, oh my, don't you look good today!? Dang, male/female/human/alien/4thDimensional creature visiting my profile, you look stunning!

Anyways, my name is Kevin, and I use this app when I am bored, meaning all the time so I'm online often.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>MidnaLink</b> - 3 hours ago<b>Phooey</b> - 3 hours ago<b>thefmlman2011</b> - 5 hours ago<b>quinzxl</b> - 5 hours ago<b>romaique</b> - 5 hours ago<b>earljonez</b> - 7 hours ago<b>pauliegon</b> - 7 hours ago<b>Allusivness</b> - 8 hours ago<b>17shades</b> - 21 hours ago<b>TheTshirt</b> - yesterday at 7:38am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 3:29pm<b>Mmmsushi</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 2:08pm<b>fantae</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 1:24pm<b>dillonfi</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 11:45am<b>PikarooArtist</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 10:08am<b>TheNiceOne</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 7:30am<b>nityasomaiya</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 2:00am<b>Saso</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 10:11pm

Fucked!<b>imunoz903</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 1:36am<b>Mukuro</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 8:12pm<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 3:50pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 2:46pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 1:08pm<b>TheNiceOne</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 1:02pm<b>quinzxl</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 11:17am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 8:54am<b>salpyy</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 8:31am<b>thuguke</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 7:30am<b>ScoobyDude</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 5:06am<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 4:25am<b>EMCsheldon</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 8:17pm<b>apineapple</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 12:56am<b>paintedwings12</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 9:58pm<b>Tavers</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 7:44pm<b>Stillo</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:43pm<b>raspygirl</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 4:03am

MrSassypants's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML

#19484468
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19714) - you deserved it (21902)

On 04/17/2012 at 3:23pm - misc - by phoneless - Jordan

Today, while I was in the midst of the most mind-blowing shower sex ever, the fire alarm went off. My girlfriend had left the stove top on and the entire kitchen had caught on fire. So instead of finishing, I frantically ran around naked trying to douse the flames. FML

#19484170
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27051) - you deserved it (3861)

On 04/17/2012 at 2:13pm - intimacy - by blocked_by_fire (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my daughter has been watching Supernatural and The X-Files so she'll fit in better at school. I'm not even angry that she's suddenly a brain-dead conformist, it's just that she now has nightmares all the time and insists on sleeping in my bed. She's a kicker. FML

#19479496
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21364) - you deserved it (5329)

On 04/16/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by orangechicken (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that my daughter has been watching Supernatural and The X-Files so she'll fit in better at school. I'm not even angry that she's suddenly a brain-dead conformist, it's just that she now has nightmares all the time and insists on sleeping in my bed. She's a kicker. FML

#19479496
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21364) - you deserved it (5329)

On 04/16/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by orangechicken (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got into an argument with my dad in his hotel room. I lost my temper and stormed out onto the balcony for some fresh air, at which point he decided to lock the door behind me, trapping me there for half an hour while he watched TV. FML

#19468154
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18344) - you deserved it (10653)

On 04/14/2012 at 6:56pm - misc - by fuckbucket14 - Egypt (Al Bahr al Ahmar)

Today, I had to pick my 22-year-old son up from the hospital, after he got blind drunk, got his hand stuck in a Pringles can, and got the bright idea of staggering to the local ER to get it cut off. FML

#19438168
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22589) - you deserved it (2534)

On 04/09/2012 at 6:32pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up to the sight of a zucchini and a condom on my bedside table, along with a note saying "I know it's tough being single." Apparently my mom has boundary issues, my dad will laugh at anything, and the fact I just got dumped means nothing. FML

#19437878
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27772) - you deserved it (2573)

On 04/09/2012 at 5:34pm - intimacy - by Madeline Lee (woman) - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend, when I had to go pee. Halfway down the aisle, I tripped, screamed, and fell face-first into some guy. My boyfriend is now accusing me of cheating and "flirting" with every man I see. FML

#19436795
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26245) - you deserved it (3697)

On 04/09/2012 at 2:18pm - love - by missclitter - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven method of birth control. FML

#19428378
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24151) - you deserved it (3197)

On 04/08/2012 at 6:37am - intimacy - by Jordan - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my wife sent me to the store to pick stuff up so we could make BLTs. I got the bacon, but couldn't remember what else went into them, so I bought an avocado and napkins. When I got back home, my wife very slowly and sarcastically explained what BLT stands for. FML

#19424336
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7594) - you deserved it (49242)

On 04/07/2012 at 3:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I cleaned my computer screen for the first time in ages. When I turned it on a few hours later, I spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to figure out why the brightness was suddenly so painfully high. FML

#19424189
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5802) - you deserved it (23134)

On 04/07/2012 at 3:12pm - misc - by strokingitasitype (man) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, I dressed up for a date. After waiting for hours, sending countless texts and voice mails to my date, and thinking I'd been stood up, I remembered my date is actually scheduled for tomorrow. FML

#19418813
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9032) - you deserved it (34035)

On 04/06/2012 at 5:04pm - love - by Sash (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my sister gave me a makeover. I protested, but she insisted it'd look great. After an eternity of eyebrow plucking, she handed me the mirror. I now have extremely badly-drawn sharpie eyebrows. FML

#19417641
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23690) - you deserved it (5920)

On 04/06/2012 at 1:11pm - misc - by nobrows (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while talking to my girlfriend, the subject of Darth Vader came up. That's when she asked me, "Aren't Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker the same person?" I don't know what's worse, the fact that she asked me that, or the fact that I got upset over her lack of Star Wars knowledge. FML

#19411033
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21901) - you deserved it (12320)

On 04/05/2012 at 7:29am - misc - by Nadaz (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was cleaning the windows at work and a guy walked in so I opened the door for him. After I opened the door, he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms open. I thought he wanted a hug so I hugged him. Apparently he wanted me to spray him with Windex. FML

#19409952
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20541) - you deserved it (2921)

On 04/05/2012 at 12:13am - work - by Kait - United States



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