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MrSassypants

Offline (the 02/08/2016 at 9:54pm) | Search for a member

MrSassypants

210Fucked!

MrSassypantsMrSassypants
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 32909
  • Number of comments : 2292
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : Hello there! My, oh my, don't you look good today!? Dang, male/female/human/alien/4thDimensional creature visiting my profile, you look stunning!

Anyways, my name is Kevin, and I use this app when I am bored, meaning all the time so I'm online often.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 19. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>Scrambled</b> - 12 hours ago<b>Cutlassocga98</b> - yesterday at 8:47am<b>shabadabba</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 12:25pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 11:01am<b>FujisakiChihiro</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 9:49pm<b>lalathefairy</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 6:52am<b>Sleep_lover654</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 8:57pm<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 7:44pm<b>Spartancjm</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 1:29pm<b>scaredpollo</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 2:34am<b>thisguy22</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 2:46am<b>turtles_yup</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 9:15am<b>Sora_McKain</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 12:41am<b>MrGodface</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 8:33pm<b>TheMike23</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 5:27pm<b>llamadramas</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 12:03am<b>HedgeFox90</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 4:07am<b>AwesomeRPGDigo</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 3:50pm

Fucked!<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 5:02pm<b>FujisakiChihiro</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 3:50am<b>turtles_yup</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 3:15pm<b>TheMike23</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 11:27pm<b>MrGodface</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 12:57am<b>AwesomeRPGDigo</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 9:51pm<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 4:29pm<b>marvelvsdc</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 5:31am<b>DeishaW</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 6:58am<b>hersheykisses511</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 4:49am<b>samsterling</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 5:11pm<b>mrfailmaster</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 7:01pm<b>momo3p</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 4:16pm<b>KagamineRinny</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 10:08pm<b>andrmac</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 4:50am<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 11:45pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 3:37pm<b>llama_monicz</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 9:27am

MrSassypants's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML

#20440379
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12775) - you deserved it (43123)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:34am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to church for the first time in my life. They had a Jesus statue at the altar, and I noticed he was surprisingly muscular. Ten minutes later, I had to excuse myself, after I caught myself fantasizing over a crucified Jesus. FML

#20432015
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11863) - you deserved it (37793)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by Weirdo (woman) - United States

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

#20428799
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24673) - you deserved it (47841) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by ELparano - Canada

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

#20423578
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55344) - you deserved it (5166)

On 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend breaking things off with me. He waited until the day after Christmas because he wanted all his presents. And he got me nothing. FML

#20423285
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47634) - you deserved it (3702)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:32am - love - by Jolene - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up from an explicit dream involving my dentist. I'm scheduled for a conscious sedation appointment with him in two hours and I'm terrified of what I might say or do while I'm under. FML

#20423262
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30422) - you deserved it (3213)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:05am - health - by ugh - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML

#20422121
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32113) - you deserved it (8023)

On 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by FuckMyEyes (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my psycho grandma yelled at me for being an "immature brat" by not offering to wash the dishes after dinner. I reminded her that when I offered last time, she raged at me for being "condescending". She responded by faking a heart attack and getting me indefinitely grounded. FML

#20421624
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37529) - you deserved it (2898)

On 12/25/2012 at 3:59pm - misc - by really mature, GRAN (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML

#20419854
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40425) - you deserved it (2662)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:20pm - misc - by Julie (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87050) - you deserved it (26900)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, I had to slowly explain to my mother that Americans are not the only people who celebrate Christmas. FML

#20419656
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32489) - you deserved it (2782)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, he got upset and accused me of making up words to make him feel stupid. All because I used the word "vapid." FML

#20414233
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28925) - you deserved it (7421)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:19pm - misc - by seriously? (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45789) - you deserved it (8647)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, I went to the local used books store to sell all my college textbooks. I spent several hundred dollars on them in total. I ended up walking out of the shop a pathetic $3.50 richer. FML

#20412112
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32256) - you deserved it (7424)

On 12/21/2012 at 7:11pm - money - by futuregigolo (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, in history class, we were talking about Ancient Rome, and what childbirth would have been like back then. One girl asked in all seriousness why they didn't use ultrasound machines to see what sex their babies were. I have to deal with people like this on a daily basis. FML

#20398310
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31004) - you deserved it (2015)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:44pm - misc - by surrounded by dumbfucks (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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