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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

11Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 17685
  • Number of comments : 1917
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>HairIsEverything</b> - yesterday at 12:16pm<b>anonykinetic</b> - yesterday at 5:02am<b>blubje</b> - yesterday at 1:34am<b>dubb420</b> - yesterday at 10:36pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - yesterday at 10:20pm<b>failedgamer01</b> - yesterday at 8:13pm<b>KwtWaffles</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:41pm<b>BowChikaFuckYou</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:13am<b>Schrypt</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:07am<b>Connerm</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 10:28pm<b>badoo</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 6:40pm<b>mkayden</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 4:50pm<b>Blade12337</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 10:44am<b>moophasa</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 12:17am<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 8:50pm<b>kittykat8770</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 7:48pm<b>LittleBuddy1</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 5:39pm<b>feven</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 4:45pm

Liked!<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 3:38pm<b>anonykinetic</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 5:53am<b>Enslaved</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 10:12pm<b>Jthewat</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:19pm<b>frances1942</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:36am<b>nix1993</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 1:20am<b>devildog562</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 5:28am<b>Prismo_Feeds</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 6:48am<b>hetalia_thailand</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 10:49pm<b>jhill5472</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:25pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 2:20pm

MrSassypants's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, my family and I went over to our new neighbors' house, to sing a carol and say hello. The only response we got was a door slammed in our faces. FML

#18590219
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10847) - you deserved it (27309)

On 12/23/2011 at 4:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I walked in on my daughter eating a handful of styrofoam packing pellets, because she thought they were Christmas candy. She's fourteen. What's next, eating rocks? FML

#18588984
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26019) - you deserved it (4319)

On 12/23/2011 at 1:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while waiting for my train, I was listening to a voicemail message on my phone. Out of nowhere, a stranger came up to me from behind and screamed "DELETE!" into my ear. His voice command deleted my message. FML

#18580798
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30543) - you deserved it (4070) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/22/2011 at 4:25pm - misc - by anna - France

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

#18554140
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11730) - you deserved it (29288)

On 12/19/2011 at 3:57pm - work - by Bob smith (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I came to the conclusion that my dad must have had a psychotic break, because when I came home, he was wearing sunglasses indoors, and blasted out Skrillex music all through the evening. The sound of diarrhea pouring into a gutter would make for better music than this. FML

#18547021
476 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18846) - you deserved it (15891)

On 12/18/2011 at 6:48pm - misc - by fmT719 - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059
175 comments

Today, I was giving a presentation at work, when I said, "But we could care less about that." My boss asked if I meant, "Couldn't care less." Wanting to avoid embarrassment, I tried to think up an excuse, only to end up blurting that it was my phone's auto-correct. FML

#18512301
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7118) - you deserved it (30867)

On 12/14/2011 at 4:21pm - work - by sharon (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to convince my girlfriend that, no matter how much she makes herself burp, she won't lose any weight. She still doesn't understand why. FML

#18503694
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27008) - you deserved it (3536)

On 12/13/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after having spent days working on it, I finished off a really elaborate seasonal greetings card for my boss. When I gave it to him, he took one look at it, flicked it in his trash can and said, "Fuck off, Steve." So much for a Christmas bonus. FML

#18438715
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19324) - you deserved it (17573)

On 12/05/2011 at 7:11pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I took my kids to the mall to see Santa. While waiting in line, my eldest got bored and loudly complained, "I don't know why we're here. Santa's not even real." I don't think any of the kids within a hundred feet took the news very well. FML

#18438378
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27176) - you deserved it (4067)

On 12/05/2011 at 6:32pm - kids - by santashelper - United States

Today, I was fired. For "lack of attention to details", specifically spelling errors. My now ex-boss misspelled the name of his own company on my severance agreement. FML

#18403408
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24486) - you deserved it (2871)

On 12/01/2011 at 1:55pm - work - by JadeC - United States (New York)

Today, I went into hospital and was being treated by a really cute doctor. Not knowing that I was going to end up here, I put on novelty underwear this morning. Well, at least he found the little green glow-in-the-dark skulls amusing. FML

#18402920
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21014) - you deserved it (5243)

On 12/01/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by Hot Pants (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my husband asked me if I was really pregnant or if I was just smuggling cheeseburgers. I'm now referred to as "the hamburgler." I'm only 5 months pregnant. FML

#18393059
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27999) - you deserved it (3425)

On 11/30/2011 at 9:57am - love - by preggers - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got my braces off. I also got my tongue pierced. Both by my orthodontist. FML

#18273711
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36567) - you deserved it (3056)

On 11/17/2011 at 4:27pm - health - by OUCH. - United States

Today, I got my braces off. I also got my tongue pierced. Both by my orthodontist. FML

#18273711
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36567) - you deserved it (3056)

On 11/17/2011 at 4:27pm - health - by OUCH. - United States



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