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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15133
  • Number of comments : 1825
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>onlychildFTW</b> - 9 hours ago<b>psychopolarbear</b> - 24 hours ago<b>akirakuran42</b> - 24 hours ago<b>ohSNAPyall</b> - yesterday at 9:00pm<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - yesterday at 11:37am<b>Welshite</b> - yesterday at 11:24am<b>zandra2020</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 11:30pm<b>NinjaDitto623</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 2:08pm<b>jjcoombs22</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 6:31pm<b>Dumonster1697</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 2:33pm<b>bagofpopkern</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 11:32pm<b>LiliLatte</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 7:02pm<b>LastQueenLyssa</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 12:43pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 2:51am<b>lexa1love</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 1:32am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 9:50pm<b>DaDezza244</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 6:48am<b>Brent40321</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 2:48pm

Liked!<b>Welshite</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 2:20pm

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MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend agreed to doing it doggy style. During it all, I pulled on her hair. I guess I pulled too hard, because when I let go, her face smacked straight into the bedside table. FML

#18220908
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12213) - you deserved it (40440)

On 11/11/2011 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by Henry - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

#18060415
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11154) - you deserved it (39713)

On 10/24/2011 at 1:04am - love - by ShitHappens - United States

Today, after my son graduated from nursing school which I, as a single parent, paid for with blood, sweat, and tears, during his grad party he was asked what his next step was. His response was, "Eh, I kinda realized I hate nursing." FML

#18060058
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34541) - you deserved it (3251)

On 10/24/2011 at 12:22am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while leaving a football game, I saw a half-empty bottle of Mountain Dew on the ground. It was night-time and there weren't many people around, so for a laugh, I picked it up and tossed it behind me as hard as I could. It hit someone. FML

#18008863
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6794) - you deserved it (47833)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44855) - you deserved it (5036)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, in the senior class I teach, I asked my students who had traveled outside of the country, excluding Canada and Mexico. One student raised his hand and proudly stated, "Arizona". He wants to be a doctor. FML

#17980491
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28499) - you deserved it (2954)

On 10/14/2011 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was late for work. Trying to cut a few seconds off the clock, I tried to open my breakfast candy bar while taking a piss. I ended up pissing all over myself and dropping the bar in the toilet. FML

#17960824
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8877) - you deserved it (36497)

On 10/11/2011 at 4:53pm - misc - by Massasam - United States

Today, in the middle of explaining over the phone to my crush how I felt about him, I got a text from his best friend, who was apparently with him at the time. It said, "He doesn't like you, get over it. Stop rambling." FML

#17958014
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31001) - you deserved it (5326)

On 10/11/2011 at 3:32am - love - by poopooppachuu - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of explaining over the phone to my crush how I felt about him, I got a text from his best friend, who was apparently with him at the time. It said, "He doesn't like you, get over it. Stop rambling." FML

#17958014
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31001) - you deserved it (5326)

On 10/11/2011 at 3:32am - love - by poopooppachuu - United States (California)

Today, I found out my dad stole money from me when he was arrested for buying Oxycodone from an undercover cop. FML

#17957151
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21801) - you deserved it (1959)

On 10/11/2011 at 12:52am - misc - by nodad - United States

Today, I saw a man dancing to a Britney Spears song in his Volkswagen Beetle. I started laughing hysterically until he got out. He was huge. I was stuck in traffic. FML

#17919835
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11204) - you deserved it (30675)

On 10/06/2011 at 1:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I spent almost $200 on a planetarium show with my boyfriend, who loves astronomy. He said his favorite thing about it was that he could pick his nose without anyone noticing. FML

#17904030
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25098) - you deserved it (3302)

On 10/04/2011 at 2:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML

#17903490
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28512) - you deserved it (2847)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:18pm - work - by SimpleSwimmer - United States (California)

Today, my wife got so upset I didn't hold her while Snooki from Jersey Shore was crying, that after the episode was done she locked herself in our room crying. Now I have to sleep on the floor of my living room. Thanks Snooki. FML

#17810986
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35073) - you deserved it (7646)

On 09/23/2011 at 2:22am - love - by drastech99 - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend said I looked like ET and made me pose next to a full scale model of him while she took a picture. She's showing her friends the picture and they agree. FML

#17795407
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25316) - you deserved it (2977)

On 09/21/2011 at 12:42pm - love - by srloin (man) - United States



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