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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 16091
  • Number of comments : 1850
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - yesterday at 2:40pm<b>FanOfAnimations</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 5:18pm<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 3:38am<b>kolonis8</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 1:14am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 4:36pm<b>Rainhawk94</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 3:59pm<b>lailakhan</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 3:46pm<b>Bradley_Dillon</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 2:03pm<b>Anonymousjeffrey</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 1:46am<b>how_about_no_</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 7:29pm<b>Ugleh</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 7:22pm<b>hetalia_thailand</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 4:49pm<b>AHandsomeCookie</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 4:45pm<b>Splenda_nauts</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 4:26pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 4:17pm<b>Lanker</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 3:21pm<b>SystemofaBlink41</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 2:36pm<b>ZombieSlayer14</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 2:17pm

Liked!<b>hetalia_thailand</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 10:49pm<b>jhill5472</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:25pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 2:20pm

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my daughter eating a handful of styrofoam packing pellets, because she thought they were Christmas candy. She's fourteen. What's next, eating rocks? FML

#18588984
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25984) - you deserved it (4317)

On 12/23/2011 at 1:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while waiting for my train, I was listening to a voicemail message on my phone. Out of nowhere, a stranger came up to me from behind and screamed "DELETE!" into my ear. His voice command deleted my message. FML

#18580798
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30494) - you deserved it (4065) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/22/2011 at 4:25pm - misc - by anna - France

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

#18554140
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11712) - you deserved it (29251)

On 12/19/2011 at 3:57pm - work - by Bob smith (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I came to the conclusion that my dad must have had a psychotic break, because when I came home, he was wearing sunglasses indoors, and blasted out Skrillex music all through the evening. The sound of diarrhea pouring into a gutter would make for better music than this. FML

#18547021
476 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18818) - you deserved it (15883)

On 12/18/2011 at 6:48pm - misc - by fmT719 - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059
175 comments

Today, I was giving a presentation at work, when I said, "But we could care less about that." My boss asked if I meant, "Couldn't care less." Wanting to avoid embarrassment, I tried to think up an excuse, only to end up blurting that it was my phone's auto-correct. FML

#18512301
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7112) - you deserved it (30836)

On 12/14/2011 at 4:21pm - work - by sharon (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to convince my girlfriend that, no matter how much she makes herself burp, she won't lose any weight. She still doesn't understand why. FML

#18503694
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26976) - you deserved it (3534)

On 12/13/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after having spent days working on it, I finished off a really elaborate seasonal greetings card for my boss. When I gave it to him, he took one look at it, flicked it in his trash can and said, "Fuck off, Steve." So much for a Christmas bonus. FML

#18438715
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18653) - you deserved it (17296)

On 12/05/2011 at 7:11pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I took my kids to the mall to see Santa. While waiting in line, my eldest got bored and loudly complained, "I don't know why we're here. Santa's not even real." I don't think any of the kids within a hundred feet took the news very well. FML

#18438378
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27147) - you deserved it (4064)

On 12/05/2011 at 6:32pm - kids - by santashelper - United States

Today, I was fired. For "lack of attention to details", specifically spelling errors. My now ex-boss misspelled the name of his own company on my severance agreement. FML

#18403408
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24444) - you deserved it (2871)

On 12/01/2011 at 1:55pm - work - by JadeC - United States (New York)

Today, I went into hospital and was being treated by a really cute doctor. Not knowing that I was going to end up here, I put on novelty underwear this morning. Well, at least he found the little green glow-in-the-dark skulls amusing. FML

#18402920
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20298) - you deserved it (5148)

On 12/01/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by Hot Pants (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my husband asked me if I was really pregnant or if I was just smuggling cheeseburgers. I'm now referred to as "the hamburgler." I'm only 5 months pregnant. FML

#18393059
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27966) - you deserved it (3422)

On 11/30/2011 at 9:57am - love - by preggers - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got my braces off. I also got my tongue pierced. Both by my orthodontist. FML

#18273711
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36518) - you deserved it (3052)

On 11/17/2011 at 4:27pm - health - by OUCH. - United States

Today, I got my braces off. I also got my tongue pierced. Both by my orthodontist. FML

#18273711
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36518) - you deserved it (3052)

On 11/17/2011 at 4:27pm - health - by OUCH. - United States

Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML

#18222610
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27530) - you deserved it (2472)

On 11/11/2011 at 9:04pm - kids - by Username - United States (Maryland)



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