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MrSassypants

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

MrSassypants

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14694
  • Number of comments : 1818
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>Brent40321</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 2:48pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 11:55am<b>Lanker</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 8:33pm<b>KennyBound</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 7:20am<b>HaveMercyOnML</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 10:30pm<b>PineappleNat</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 8:34pm<b>Paris25</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 4:25am<b>tmd4L</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 8:14pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:34pm<b>GoodGuyForSure</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 12:41am<b>pinkpig23</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 9:26pm<b>Soviet_American</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 7:41pm<b>dangson321</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 1:36pm<b>Tuffmuffin</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:40am<b>bubblesBVB61113</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 4:31am<b>ManateeRex</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 2:45pm<b>vividpictures</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 1:46pm<b>facebag</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 1:27pm

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MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, in the senior class I teach, I asked my students who had traveled outside of the country, excluding Canada and Mexico. One student raised his hand and proudly stated, "Arizona". He wants to be a doctor. FML

#17980491
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28476) - you deserved it (2953)

On 10/14/2011 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was late for work. Trying to cut a few seconds off the clock, I tried to open my breakfast candy bar while taking a piss. I ended up pissing all over myself and dropping the bar in the toilet. FML

#17960824
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8872) - you deserved it (36472)

On 10/11/2011 at 4:53pm - misc - by Massasam - United States

Today, in the middle of explaining over the phone to my crush how I felt about him, I got a text from his best friend, who was apparently with him at the time. It said, "He doesn't like you, get over it. Stop rambling." FML

#17958014
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30981) - you deserved it (5324)

On 10/11/2011 at 3:32am - love - by poopooppachuu - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of explaining over the phone to my crush how I felt about him, I got a text from his best friend, who was apparently with him at the time. It said, "He doesn't like you, get over it. Stop rambling." FML

#17958014
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30981) - you deserved it (5324)

On 10/11/2011 at 3:32am - love - by poopooppachuu - United States (California)

Today, I found out my dad stole money from me when he was arrested for buying Oxycodone from an undercover cop. FML

#17957151
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21788) - you deserved it (1957)

On 10/11/2011 at 12:52am - misc - by nodad - United States

Today, I saw a man dancing to a Britney Spears song in his Volkswagen Beetle. I started laughing hysterically until he got out. He was huge. I was stuck in traffic. FML

#17919835
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11198) - you deserved it (30657)

On 10/06/2011 at 1:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I spent almost $200 on a planetarium show with my boyfriend, who loves astronomy. He said his favorite thing about it was that he could pick his nose without anyone noticing. FML

#17904030
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25093) - you deserved it (3301)

On 10/04/2011 at 2:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML

#17903490
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28489) - you deserved it (2846)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:18pm - work - by SimpleSwimmer - United States (California)

Today, my wife got so upset I didn't hold her while Snooki from Jersey Shore was crying, that after the episode was done she locked herself in our room crying. Now I have to sleep on the floor of my living room. Thanks Snooki. FML

#17810986
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35060) - you deserved it (7646)

On 09/23/2011 at 2:22am - love - by drastech99 - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend said I looked like ET and made me pose next to a full scale model of him while she took a picture. She's showing her friends the picture and they agree. FML

#17795407
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25294) - you deserved it (2975)

On 09/21/2011 at 12:42pm - love - by srloin (man) - United States

Today, I found out my wife and three daughters all have their period on seperate weeks. I now have no break from yelling. FML

#17761753
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38227) - you deserved it (4592)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:39am - misc - by thedeerman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went out on my back patio at night to skinny dip. I live on the intracoastal, and as I was walking towards my pool, the police were doing a random search. From a boat with a spotlight. At least their whistles told me they liked the birthday suit I had on. FML

#17749646
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19792) - you deserved it (8397)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by Japaroni - United States

Today, after falling on my way out the door, hitting a bird with my car, and sitting in an hour and a half of traffic, I remembered I had the day off work. FML

Today, behind a cabinet, I found a scratch-off lottery ticket I hadn't scratched yet. After scratching it off, I realized it's a $2,500 winner. The lottery commission won't accept it because they stopped using that game 2 years ago. FML

#17688426
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39428) - you deserved it (11589)

On 09/07/2011 at 1:25pm - money - by BigMoney - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was digging in the backyard when my mom came out, nodded her head approvingly, and with a straight face told me it was good practice for when I inevitably go to prison. FML

#17661363
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24040) - you deserved it (3993)

On 09/04/2011 at 1:05pm - work - by mike - United States



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