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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

155Fucked!

MrSassypantsMrSassypants
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 30209
  • Number of comments : 2185
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : Hello there! My, oh my, don't you look good today!? Dang, male/female/human/alien/4thDimensional creature visiting my profile, you look stunning!

Anyways, my name is Kevin, and I use this app when I am bored, meaning all the time so I'm online often.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 19. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>Malfano0214</b> - 4 hours ago<b>toenails10</b> - 13 hours ago<b>xKrisSmoove</b> - 13 hours ago<b>Drakone</b> - 17 hours ago<b>hopelessfrantic</b> - 21 hours ago<b>Zoldyck</b> - 23 hours ago<b>sam_wolves</b> - 24 hours ago<b>lilferrit</b> - yesterday at 1:19am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - yesterday at 1:01am<b>Mobetta_2300</b> - yesterday at 10:04pm<b>Rugabee</b> - yesterday at 7:46pm<b>mineller</b> - yesterday at 4:27pm<b>gte225</b> - yesterday at 4:03pm<b>IncognitoPoison</b> - yesterday at 3:47pm<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - yesterday at 9:26am<b>apineapple</b> - yesterday at 9:11am<b>TheTshirt</b> - yesterday at 8:22am<b>stephenseiber1</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 12:03pm

Fucked!<b>xKrisSmoove</b> - 7 hours ago<b>qsxsqsxs</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 12:40am<b>I_Like_Dogs</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 7:24pm<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 1:57pm<b>luridz</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 4:37am<b>schindler12345</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 3:50am<b>BWAHA</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 10:40pm<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:34pm<b>leafynitemare</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 11:24am<b>JessiPark</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 1:52am<b>MissEris</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:28pm<b>bobby0000000</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 2:00am<b>Baka_Me</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 9:31am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 4:10am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 2:37pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 7:13am<b>AnonymousBella</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 1:40am<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 8:08pm

MrSassypants's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the market to buy some groceries. Before I got even half-way home, a guy stormed toward me, pulled what looked like a knife, and chased me around the block while screaming that he'd kill me for sleeping with his wife. Nope, still a 15-year-old virgin here. FML

#20506765
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36941) - you deserved it (2343)

On 02/14/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah)

Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML

#20498469
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28913) - you deserved it (3087)

On 02/08/2013 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I was playing Slender, when I caught a glimpse of the Slenderman. I jumped in my chair, letting rip a huge fart in the process. Nobody heard it, but only because my shrieks of terror drowned out the sound. FML

#20498426
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23626) - you deserved it (8811)

On 02/08/2013 at 4:59pm - misc - by theydidsmellitthough (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML

#20498382
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25724) - you deserved it (3438)

On 02/08/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went and bought lunch for all the people I work with. The only meal the place forgot was mine. FML

#20473074
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29472) - you deserved it (2909)

On 01/22/2013 at 1:49pm - work - by me - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I asked him to make me some coffee too. When he brought me my drink, I took a sip, and realized he'd poured salt in it. As I gagged, he muttered, "Next time, make it yourself." FML

#20469761
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30191) - you deserved it (7517)

On 01/20/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by megean c.l. (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend of three days met up with me at the movie theater, sporting a crude tattoo of my face on his cheek, along with a love heart and the word "forever." Looks like I'm single again. FML

#20469621
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37622) - you deserved it (3978)

On 01/20/2013 at 2:28pm - love - by maybe dead in a day (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after hours of trying to put a screaming baby to sleep, she finally fell asleep in my arms. I was so happy. Then, I got the hiccups. FML

#20456464
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30506) - you deserved it (2464)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:15am - kids - by hiccups - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my husband suggested a way for us to "make some money" off our pregnancy. His great idea? Pregnancy porn. FML

#20456391
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41347) - you deserved it (4786)

On 01/13/2013 at 12:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I found out that my dad, thinking it was an advertisement, threw away a letter from the college I applied to. FML

#20454916
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35457) - you deserved it (2398)

On 01/12/2013 at 4:52am - misc - by gdog10122 - United States

Today, at the reading of my mother's last will and testament, I found out that despite having cared for her for the final years of her life, she denied me an inheritance. She basically said I'm an embarrassment, because when she wrote it, I was 31 years old, with no wife or children. FML

#20445078
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27169) - you deserved it (2120)

On 01/06/2013 at 4:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, after 3 years with my dream girl, I decided to pop the question by making her complete a scavenger hunt ending in her finding me, suit and everything, by the park bench where we had our first kiss. She came home tired and, instead of following the clues, decided to watch TV all day. FML

#20444582
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32539) - you deserved it (4856)

On 01/06/2013 at 3:49am - love - by ItRainedOutside (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

#20442461
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20626) - you deserved it (7013)

On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML

#20440379
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12444) - you deserved it (42410)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:34am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to church for the first time in my life. They had a Jesus statue at the altar, and I noticed he was surprisingly muscular. Ten minutes later, I had to excuse myself, after I caught myself fantasizing over a crucified Jesus. FML

#20432015
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11438) - you deserved it (36991)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by Weirdo (woman) - United States



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