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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

23Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 18856
  • Number of comments : 1950
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>Schrypt</b> - 3 hours ago<b>kerstileann</b> - 4 hours ago<b>Nailpolishaholic</b> - 13 hours ago<b>alexlaurennic</b> - 19 hours ago<b>trellz17</b> - yesterday at 10:29pm<b>Blade12337</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 7:21pm<b>Demig0d6</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 6:56pm<b>wasliedtoasakid</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 5:50pm<b>coyotefox</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 7:33am<b>CallMeBatman</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 3:01pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 10:04am<b>RoperDaRipper</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:59am<b>Prismo_Feeds</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:23am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:17pm<b>ThatOneLazyChick</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:17am<b>Domdom96</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 7:14am<b>quickit</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:34am<b>Echoa21</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 11:36pm

Liked!<b>Blade12337</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 1:21am<b>wasliedtoasakid</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 11:50pm<b>coyotefox</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 1:33pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm<b>Domdom96</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 1:14pm<b>leviheichou</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 7:11am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 5:04am<b>Robby4800</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 12:43am<b>Hiktmae</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 12:10am<b>WadeNickerson</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 9:48pm<b>BaDumTsss</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 1:06pm<b>quickit</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 5:39am<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 3:38pm<b>anonykinetic</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 5:53am<b>Enslaved</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 10:12pm<b>Jthewat</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:19pm<b>frances1942</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:36am<b>nix1993</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 1:20am

MrSassypants's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, a pigeon got into my apartment. After knocking over a very expensive vase, it panicked, rammed itself against a window, and shat all over the floor as it tried to get out. FML

#19611512
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19551) - you deserved it (1785)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:01pm - animals - by Eric Ngan - Singapore

Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML

#19607657
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24256) - you deserved it (3653)

On 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML

#19607447
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12357) - you deserved it (20344)

On 05/11/2012 at 2:29pm - love - by cockblocked (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

#19592298
373 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30345) - you deserved it (3075)

On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States

Today, I finally found out what the horrible smell at work was. A rat had decided to make its home in our emergency exit sign and had been fried by the electricity. I now have to fix this. Hello scorched dead rat. FML

#19569212
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20995) - you deserved it (1753)

On 05/03/2012 at 5:17pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had a chest x-ray. I thought everything was okay, that is until the tech gasped slightly and muttered, "Mother of God." I asked him what was wrong, and he kept insisting he had no idea what I was talking about. Now I'm so upset I can't even sleep. FML

#19564735
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30144) - you deserved it (2123)

On 05/02/2012 at 6:41pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boyfriend and I were making love for the first time, when out of nowhere my cat meowed from the doorway. My boyfriend sighed, pulled out, and exasperatedly called me a selfish bitch for not having put my cat outside. FML

#19564569
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30281) - you deserved it (4928)

On 05/02/2012 at 6:06pm - intimacy - by S12Sophia (woman) - France

Today, I put my ironing board away in the bathroom. After closing the door, I heard a loud noise. The board had opened up while falling over, taking up the width of the room. I can't open the door. FML

#19533059
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22751) - you deserved it (3265) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/26/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Magicgwen - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was hanging out with some of my friends when I fell asleep. When I woke up, I found that they had shaved the F word into my arm. I don't know what is more disturbing: the fact that this is what my friends do for fun, or that I have enough arm hair to have four letters shaved into it. FML

#19532931
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19281) - you deserved it (3861)

On 04/26/2012 at 4:23pm - misc - by HAIRY (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML

#19531197
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7378) - you deserved it (30138)

On 04/26/2012 at 6:44am - work - by NoPrivacy (woman) - United States

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents over dinner. During the meal, he excused himself to the bathroom, and when he didn't come back after a few minutes, I went to check up on him. I ended up finding him in the living room, pocketing a pack of ambien from my mom's bag. FML

#19528563
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24722) - you deserved it (3042)

On 04/25/2012 at 6:43pm - love - by anyoi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was so lonely that I had a conversation with myself on my way home. It was only when I reached my apartment complex that I discovered that my neighbour had been walking behind me, laughing to himself the whole way. FML

#19525636
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18215) - you deserved it (9278)

On 04/25/2012 at 12:50am - misc - by unfortunate (woman) - Sweden

Today, my boss made me work a longer shift than usual. Not because he needed me in, but just so I'd finish at the same time as his brat of a son, and give him a lift home. FML

#19522593
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23524) - you deserved it (1773)

On 04/24/2012 at 4:15pm - work - by Mug - United Kingdom

Today, I realized just how bad my problem with making eye contact is, when I caught myself looking the other way when the singer in a music video looked directly at the camera. FML

#19522218
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19818) - you deserved it (4326)

On 04/24/2012 at 2:49pm - misc - by suhleedah18 - United States

Today, I realized just how awful my relationships have been when I discovered I emotionally connect with women on Jerry Springer. FML

#19511364
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17315) - you deserved it (5096)

On 04/22/2012 at 2:14pm - love - by Coquette (woman) - United States



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