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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15478
  • Number of comments : 1830
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>iluvFMLs15</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 3:08am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 11:46am<b>42LifeUniverse</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 12:37am<b>ohSNAPyall</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:47pm<b>groovy579</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 8:27pm<b>Davids9199</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 1:35am<b>Paco_el_Taco</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 8:29pm<b>almightyteapot</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 4:22pm<b>Fallout_2077</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 4:12pm<b>Ilikepie467</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 3:25pm<b>starcaller17</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 1:58pm<b>Aero_x</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 1:14pm<b>trellz17</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 12:00pm<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 11:10am<b>Connerm</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 10:36am<b>BigJoeZD</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 10:15am<b>Treken</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 9:33am<b>Sara95</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 8:49am

Liked!<b>Welshite</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 2:20pm

MrSassypants's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend still won't talk to me, after I caused him the "worst embarrassment" of his life in front of his friends. What did I do wrong? I joined their conversation and ended up confusing the fictional characters of Gollum and Yoda with one another. FML

#20545430
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15942) - you deserved it (57731) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/15/2013 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Centre)

Today, my grandma gave me a sex talk. Not the usual one, either. This one was about blowjobs. I had to sit politely as she explained it's something all women have to learn if they want a well-behaved husband, but that it's an "acquired taste". Gag me. FML

#20545240
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43539) - you deserved it (5362)

On 03/15/2013 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by butnotlikethat (woman) - China (Jiangxi)

Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing my feelings to a girl I really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML

#20545151
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32444) - you deserved it (2891)

On 03/15/2013 at 6:43pm - love - by forever single, I guess (man) - United States

Today, I was at the library doing research for my midterm. All of the computers were in use, so I decided to use my laptop instead. Ten minutes later, I was confronted and kicked out. My offense? Unauthorized use of the library's so-called "Free Public WiFi". FML

#20540861
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34661) - you deserved it (2776)

On 03/12/2013 at 3:03pm - misc - by PhailedMidterm (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I finally got the courage to confess my feelings to the guy I have loved for a year now in a long note. He called half an hour later and said, "I'm not going to read this crap, just tell me what it says". FML

#20535268
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31466) - you deserved it (7284)

On 03/07/2013 at 10:53pm - love - by hoolabaloo (woman) - India (Gujarat)

Today, in my architecture class, my professor's lecture consisted of a list of movies and books which feature characters who are architects. I couldn't leave because I needed the attendance points, and it lasted 45 minutes. I paid out of state tuition for this. FML

#20535215
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22563) - you deserved it (3597)

On 03/07/2013 at 10:18pm - misc - by seriously wtf (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after my 5-year-old finally got over his grandmother's death, we went to a store and saw a lady that looked exactly like her. She came up to us asking if we saw her grandson; I can't get my son to stop freaking out. FML

#20535134
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36854) - you deserved it (2157)

On 03/07/2013 at 8:55pm - kids - by Maxie - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was walking to my professor's office. I've had an upset stomach all week, and I still felt a little gassy, so I politely decided to pass gass before entering the room. More than just gas came out. FML

Today, my boyfriend ripped my panties trying to get them off. Not off me, off himself. FML

#20530380
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46037) - you deserved it (5892)

On 03/04/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by nopanties (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, due to plumbing issues, I had to choose between a goosebump-inducing cold or skin-blistering hot shower. This is the 7th day in a row. My husband says it shouldn't be more than another week before he "gets it figured out". FML

#20528844
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26031) - you deserved it (2768)

On 03/03/2013 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking my dog for a walk and forgot a bag to pick up his poop, since it's illegal to not pick it up in my town. Right as my dog started to take a dump, a cop car drove by and continued to watch me as I was forced to pick up the poop with my bare hands. FML

#20527973
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44265) - you deserved it (20266)

On 03/02/2013 at 10:32am - animals - by yikes - United States

Today, to avoid a massive delay on our scheduled flight at the airport, we were generously moved to an earlier flight home. An hour later, our new flight had been cancelled and they told us we'd be stuck at the airport overnight. Our original flight took off fine. FML

#20527906
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31967) - you deserved it (3222)

On 03/02/2013 at 9:14am - misc - by melyeah - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at my class's band concert. Before the curtain was raised, I helped haul the piano to a different spot so a girl who would've had to stand behind it could be seen. I said, "There, now your mom can see you play!" She responded with, "My mom's blind." FML

#20527693
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33849) - you deserved it (3590)

On 03/02/2013 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that the man I just married doesn't want to have children. We had this conversation multiple times with no problems before getting married, but now he would "rather die" than have children, because according to him, they would ruin his life. FML

#20527672
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31096) - you deserved it (5138)

On 03/02/2013 at 1:05am - love - by bummer.. (woman) - United States

Today, I was trying to be sexy and change in front of my boyfriend. As I was changing, he started to talk to me about how we should both try and lose weight. FML

#20523139
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32831) - you deserved it (7214)

On 02/26/2013 at 3:26pm - love - by pooh anne (woman) - United States (Arkansas)



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