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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14658
  • Number of comments : 1818
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>Brent40321</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 2:48pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 11:55am<b>Lanker</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 8:33pm<b>KennyBound</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 7:20am<b>HaveMercyOnML</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 10:30pm<b>PineappleNat</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 8:34pm<b>Paris25</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 4:25am<b>tmd4L</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 8:14pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:34pm<b>GoodGuyForSure</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 12:41am<b>pinkpig23</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 9:26pm<b>Soviet_American</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 7:41pm<b>dangson321</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 1:36pm<b>Tuffmuffin</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:40am<b>bubblesBVB61113</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 4:31am<b>ManateeRex</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 2:45pm<b>vividpictures</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 1:46pm<b>facebag</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 1:27pm

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MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend ripped my panties trying to get them off. Not off me, off himself. FML

#20530380
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46006) - you deserved it (5888)

On 03/04/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by nopanties (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, due to plumbing issues, I had to choose between a goosebump-inducing cold or skin-blistering hot shower. This is the 7th day in a row. My husband says it shouldn't be more than another week before he "gets it figured out". FML

#20528844
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25685) - you deserved it (2743)

On 03/03/2013 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking my dog for a walk and forgot a bag to pick up his poop, since it's illegal to not pick it up in my town. Right as my dog started to take a dump, a cop car drove by and continued to watch me as I was forced to pick up the poop with my bare hands. FML

#20527973
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44237) - you deserved it (20254)

On 03/02/2013 at 10:32am - animals - by yikes - United States

Today, to avoid a massive delay on our scheduled flight at the airport, we were generously moved to an earlier flight home. An hour later, our new flight had been cancelled and they told us we'd be stuck at the airport overnight. Our original flight took off fine. FML

#20527906
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31939) - you deserved it (3217)

On 03/02/2013 at 9:14am - misc - by melyeah - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at my class's band concert. Before the curtain was raised, I helped haul the piano to a different spot so a girl who would've had to stand behind it could be seen. I said, "There, now your mom can see you play!" She responded with, "My mom's blind." FML

#20527693
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33824) - you deserved it (3585)

On 03/02/2013 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that the man I just married doesn't want to have children. We had this conversation multiple times with no problems before getting married, but now he would "rather die" than have children, because according to him, they would ruin his life. FML

#20527672
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31060) - you deserved it (5133)

On 03/02/2013 at 1:05am - love - by bummer.. (woman) - United States

Today, I was trying to be sexy and change in front of my boyfriend. As I was changing, he started to talk to me about how we should both try and lose weight. FML

#20523139
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32806) - you deserved it (7210)

On 02/26/2013 at 3:26pm - love - by pooh anne (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my fiancé is returning home, so I decided to wax myself, thinking things would get intimate. I warmed the wax strips and set them on the counter. Our cat jumped onto the counter and managed to roll onto one of the strips. Suffice to say, the wrong pussy got a painful waxing. FML

#20521590
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44874) - you deserved it (7311)

On 02/25/2013 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was pushing my wheelchair-bound grandpa back home, when a pretty girl walked past us in the opposite direction. He made me stop and turn him around, just so he could ogle her ass as she walked away. FML

#20518187
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26878) - you deserved it (4474) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/22/2013 at 9:27pm - misc - by hé merde - Sent from mobile version

Today, I took my driver's test. I did everything flawlessly, but my examiner kept all but pissing his pants throughout. He yelled, "ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!" when I drove past a traffic light just as it was about to turn red. The road was almost empty. He failed me on the spot. FML

#20517994
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12073) - you deserved it (46550)

On 02/22/2013 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I stole a pen from the doctor's office while she wasn't looking. Later on at work, I idly pulled the pen out during a meeting. My colleague looked at me, horrified. The pen had the words "minimally invasive gynecological surgery" emblazoned on it. I'm a man. FML

#20516811
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6904) - you deserved it (45273)

On 02/21/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom refused to sign me up for a CPR class, reasoning that if I was ever put in a situation where a person was choking, I could save them using my "common sense" and "intellect". I need the class to graduate. FML

#20515292
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29496) - you deserved it (2288)

On 02/20/2013 at 7:32pm - misc - by blob - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that my upstairs neighbor has a cat. I was blessed with this knowledge when she threw several piles of used kitty litter and cat poop over her balcony and onto my patio. FML

#20509867
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25828) - you deserved it (1835)

On 02/16/2013 at 7:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I went to the market to buy some groceries. Before I got even half-way home, a guy stormed toward me, pulled what looked like a knife, and chased me around the block while screaming that he'd kill me for sleeping with his wife. Nope, still a 15-year-old virgin here. FML

#20506765
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34116) - you deserved it (2117)

On 02/14/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah)

Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML

#20498469
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26443) - you deserved it (2839)

On 02/08/2013 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)



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