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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

23Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 18791
  • Number of comments : 1946
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>trellz17</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Blade12337</b> - yesterday at 7:21pm<b>Demig0d6</b> - yesterday at 6:56pm<b>wasliedtoasakid</b> - yesterday at 5:50pm<b>coyotefox</b> - yesterday at 7:33am<b>CallMeBatman</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 3:01pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 10:04am<b>RoperDaRipper</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:59am<b>Prismo_Feeds</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:23am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:17pm<b>ThatOneLazyChick</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:17am<b>Domdom96</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 7:14am<b>Schrypt</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 3:29am<b>quickit</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:34am<b>Echoa21</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 11:36pm<b>JayDay_123</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 10:27pm<b>kangx1</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 10:09pm<b>ohSNAPyall</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 9:19pm

Liked!<b>Blade12337</b> - yesterday at 1:21am<b>wasliedtoasakid</b> - yesterday at 11:50pm<b>coyotefox</b> - yesterday at 1:33pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm<b>Domdom96</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 1:14pm<b>leviheichou</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 7:11am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 5:04am<b>Robby4800</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 12:43am<b>Hiktmae</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 12:10am<b>WadeNickerson</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 9:48pm<b>BaDumTsss</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 1:06pm<b>quickit</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 5:39am<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 3:38pm<b>anonykinetic</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 5:53am<b>Enslaved</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 10:12pm<b>Jthewat</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:19pm<b>frances1942</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:36am<b>nix1993</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 1:20am

MrSassypants's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I broke a glass case containing my pet scorpions. I still can't find them. FML

#21312200
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26993) - you deserved it (13521)

On 12/05/2014 at 8:32pm - animals - by sting - United States (California)

Today, the family computer's 15-year-old CRT monitor which gives me headaches finally stopped working. My dad quickly found a replacement: an even older CRT monitor that gives me worse headaches. FML

#21311912
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29263) - you deserved it (2691)

On 12/05/2014 at 9:00am - misc - by has an old monitor (man) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I found the Christmas candy that I'd hidden a year ago. Turns out I wasn't the only living creature who had found it. FML

#21311642
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23327) - you deserved it (6533)

On 12/04/2014 at 8:56pm - misc - by shugette212 - United States

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

#21311441
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40603) - you deserved it (2728)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband shaved off his beard. Turns out he looks like my ex. FML

Today, I dug out the 5 fancy, extremely expensive candles I bought during Black Friday. I lit one up, and was delighted that it smelled so great. My mother then walked into my room and stated that it smelled "like shit". The other four were going to be a Christmas gift for her. FML

#21309261
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29535) - you deserved it (2976)

On 12/01/2014 at 2:30am - money - by shitty candles - United States (Washington)

Today, I bought a Santa hat. After wearing the hat for a few hours, I noticed a strange lump near the tip of it. I stuck my hand inside to dig out the mysterious object. It was a dead cockroach. FML

#21308445
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30068) - you deserved it (2974)

On 11/29/2014 at 11:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it's my birthday. My grandma posted about it on her Facebook wall, but people got confused and thought it was her birthday instead. She got twice as many birthday wishes as I did, and that's including the ones I got outside of Facebook. FML

#21308382
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28546) - you deserved it (2501)

On 11/29/2014 at 10:20pm - misc - by Drew (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while at work, I had to spend an hour and a half on the phone, listening to an old lady relive her entire day in excruciating detail. We're not allowed to hang up on customers, and she was extremely quick to dismiss all my attempts to steer the call back on topic. FML

#21308187
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28808) - you deserved it (3144)

On 11/29/2014 at 2:45pm - work - by gotta euthanize em all (man) - Canada

Today, I decided to check out a dating site, when I stumbled across my ex wife's profile. She'd had it for four out of the five years of our marriage. And no, it didn't rate us as a good match. FML

#21305183
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30618) - you deserved it (3243)

On 11/24/2014 at 1:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I met my best friend's girlfriend for the first time. After a few hours of talking and eating, she followed me to the bathroom and said, dead serious, ''If you ever touch him or get too close to him, I will cut you''. I've known him for twelve years, they have been dating for a month. FML

#21305050
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37879) - you deserved it (2882)

On 11/24/2014 at 8:44am - love - by ohwell (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was really excited to get a new bank account in my name. My parents wanted me to have it so they could transfer money from mine to theirs and vice versa. What excited me less was my father drunkenly accessing it and taking all my cash. FML

#21305033
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30260) - you deserved it (3688)

On 11/24/2014 at 7:40am - money - by ugh - United States (New York)

Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML

#21304373
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28423) - you deserved it (2522)

On 11/23/2014 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my coworker and I announced that we are spending our holidays together, because we both have kids. My boss announced he is coming with us. FML

#21303728
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28893) - you deserved it (3410)

On 11/22/2014 at 5:16am - work - by Carnage23 (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I noticed my fish was still hungry after feeding him earlier. I figured, "Eh, a little bit more won't kill him". I was wrong. FML

#21303699
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29315) - you deserved it (8267)

On 11/22/2014 at 2:22am - animals - by liishax3 (woman) - United States (California)



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