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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

4Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 16252
  • Number of comments : 1859
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>ninjadinos</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Tbear11</b> - 13 hours ago<b>Slothapus</b> - 14 hours ago<b>carzaki27</b> - 19 hours ago<b>Flaming_Pandas</b> - yesterday at 11:03pm<b>devildog562</b> - yesterday at 8:35pm<b>rozline96</b> - yesterday at 8:12pm<b>sammiixoxo</b> - yesterday at 4:49pm<b>DubiousDude69</b> - yesterday at 1:02pm<b>xokpxo</b> - yesterday at 3:46am<b>kittina</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 2:14am<b>PaigeLeeAnn11</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 1:04am<b>ispeakspanish</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 12:59am<b>Prismo_Feeds</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 12:47am<b>Harpy</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 10:52pm<b>alynnek</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 9:39pm<b>DanShowsNoMercy</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 8:38pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 8:16pm

Liked!<b>Prismo_Feeds</b> - yesterday at 6:48am<b>hetalia_thailand</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 10:49pm<b>jhill5472</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:25pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 2:20pm

MrSassypants's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my grandma's yard sale, only to find my baby pictures being sold for 25 cents each. FML

#21275511
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38650) - you deserved it (2977)

On 10/11/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by Forge (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML

#21275111
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31129) - you deserved it (18250)

On 10/10/2014 at 5:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got roped into a volunteering thing at the last minute. I was waiting outside with all these kids who looked hungry. Feeling bad, I passed around crisps and cookies. Turns out we were at a convention to promote healthy eating in malnourished children. FML

#21274410
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28497) - you deserved it (4909)

On 10/09/2014 at 6:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while arriving to a date for the first time in a couple years, the first thing out of his mouth was, "I'm only dressed up because I had court today." FML

#21274403
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29122) - you deserved it (3154)

On 10/09/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend admitted than he's been using Febreze instead of showering for the past month. FML

Today, my laziness reached a whole new level when I caught myself skipping the longer FML stories to read the shorter ones. FML

#21272079
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29423) - you deserved it (11519)

On 10/06/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by eh - Azerbaijan (Baki)

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

#21265910
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39520) - you deserved it (6271)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dog got so excited about a new toy that she vomited all over it. I had to clean up the vomit, throw away the toy, and now have a very sad dog. FML

#21265865
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34493) - you deserved it (3757)

On 09/26/2014 at 3:44pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I heard my boyfriend talking with my father in the backyard. I thought he was asking for my hand in marriage. He was actually telling him about his plans to break up with me. FML

#21265851
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35760) - you deserved it (3309)

On 09/26/2014 at 3:13pm - love - by ihateguys (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend. He said it was because he lived 2 hours away, but I think the ultrasound photos his other girlfriend posted proudly on his Facebook wall are the real reason. FML

#21260092
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42574) - you deserved it (3715)

On 09/17/2014 at 3:48pm - love - by kitkat (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to scare what I thought was a stray cat away from my friend's car in our work parking garage by hitting the panic button on his keys, which did, indeed, make the creature panic. That's when I learned it was not a cat. It was a skunk. FML

Today, I had to decline the sale of alcohol to a man who reeked of booze and was practically falling asleep at my till. He tried to convince me that he wasn't drunk, he was just blind. Still refusing to sell him the beer, he started yelling at me, accusing me of "being racist against the 'blinds'". FML

#21256123
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36141) - you deserved it (2712)

On 09/11/2014 at 2:49am - work - by PerfectVision (woman) - United States (Washington)



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