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MrSassypants

Offline (the 07/24/2014 at 3:58am) | Search for a member

MrSassypants

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14083
  • Number of comments : 1813
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>Welshite</b> - yesterday at 10:34am<b>xxrogerthatxx</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 8:08pm<b>hetalia_thailand</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 2:07pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:53pm<b>MrSirPerson</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:10pm<b>helloimclaudia</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 8:01am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 7:01am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 9:59pm<b>DaDezza244</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 11:59am<b>ghsthnt95</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 7:10pm<b>wondercat40</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 6:11pm<b>scoobs231</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 1:20pm<b>ironfey</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 9:42pm<b>HylianTwilight</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 8:24pm<b>Emmmmmer</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 3:06am<b>JulietMarie</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 3:02pm<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 9:29pm<b>mt631</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 4:58pm

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend saw a stamp on my hand and asked me which club I had gone to last night. I was so desperate to seem cool that I lied, instead of admitting it was actually from a children's play group that I took my kids to. FML

#21105342
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32479) - you deserved it (8015)

On 04/05/2014 at 6:05pm - kids - by lamemom - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, the girl I've been dating for two weeks brought up the topic of marriage, then started asking me when we're moving in together. FML

#21102998
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45780) - you deserved it (6288)

On 04/02/2014 at 5:22pm - love - by fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuc (man) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, my 14-year-old son's pathetic rebellion came to a head. He ran away from home, leaving a note saying he hates me and was leaving forever to be part of a gang his friends had formed. He came back an hour later crying. His whole gang had gotten mugged, which he somehow blamed me for. FML

#21102946
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47785) - you deserved it (5908)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:10pm - kids - by I Have Failed (man) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, my students all handed in their 1,000 word papers. The assignment was for them to write about a strong, benevolent leader who influenced the world. Around half of the papers were about Hitler. FML

#21102694
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40018) - you deserved it (9456)

On 04/02/2014 at 7:30am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, fed up with my nerdy appearance, I got my hair shaved off, hoping for a Walter White kind of look. I didn't think it was too bad, but not even an hour later, I'd already been called a "fat Bruce Willis" and compared to a freshly circumcised penis. FML

#21092620
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34082) - you deserved it (7091)

On 03/21/2014 at 12:10pm - misc - by richard (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I started at my new job. My manager, upon meeting me, hugged me and sniffed my neck, then commented that I smelled "natural" and told me how much he loves that. I have to work with this creep until god knows when. FML

#21081278
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37025) - you deserved it (3473)

On 03/08/2014 at 12:19pm - work - by kittykat033 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was babysitting my 4-year-old cousin. She scraped her knee, and in an attempt to cheer her up, I put a refrigerator box over my head and waddled around like a penguin. She stopped crying, but only after I fell down a flight of tile stairs. FML

Today, I was packing, when my parents told me to put my little sister's toothbrush in the top pocket of their suitcase. The pocket I opened had 3 unopened boxes of condoms in it. We're going to my gran's house, and I'm going to be sleeping on a mattress on the floor of their room. FML

#21040204
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50884) - you deserved it (4716)

On 01/26/2014 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mom made me go shopping with her. It was freezing out, but she didn't wear a coat, boasting that she doesn't feel the chill like I do. By the time we drove home she was whining about freezing to death, and now I'm stuck in a house whose heating is set to "inferno". FML

#21035197
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38261) - you deserved it (3770)

On 01/21/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland

Today, my roommate, who has bipolar disorder and refuses to take his meds, tried to stab me with a kitchen knife because I threw out his moldy cheese. FML

#21031274
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43093) - you deserved it (5043)

On 01/17/2014 at 10:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my students unanimously agreed, in front of me, that the only reason they take my course is to look at my ass. FML

#21028396
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55921) - you deserved it (13753)

On 01/15/2014 at 12:54am - intimacy - by jseid2 - United States (California)

Today, trying to get some much needed rest, I heard my neighbors fighting loudly. When they finally quit, they left a DVD on, directly behind my wall: Spongebob, with the menu tune on loop. FML

#21025356
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42456) - you deserved it (3466)

On 01/12/2014 at 6:04am - misc - by tired individual (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boss hung a dartboard in his office. It has a printout of my employee photo taped to it. FML

#21023884
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37635) - you deserved it (4362)

On 01/10/2014 at 8:20pm - work - by lk mm, n vwls (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment, due to the fact that five raccoons have decided to sit outside my only door and prevent me from getting out. Every time I look at one, they hiss at me. FML

#21023350
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42212) - you deserved it (5238)

On 01/10/2014 at 6:15am - animals - by RaccoonFever - United States (California)

Today, my parents used my going away party as a cover up for my sister's surprise party. I didn't know until they brought out the cake. FML

#21022962
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39238) - you deserved it (2975)

On 01/09/2014 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sri Lanka



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