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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

142Fucked!

MrSassypantsMrSassypants
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 29777
  • Number of comments : 2145
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : Hello there! My, oh my, don't you look good today!? Dang, male/female/human/alien/4thDimensional creature visiting my profile, you look stunning!

Anyways, my name is Kevin, and I use this app when I am bored, meaning all the time so I'm online often.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 19. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>Nail7777</b> - 3 hours ago<b>yuno_gasai</b> - 4 hours ago<b>az1970</b> - 9 hours ago<b>fringeisawesome</b> - 21 hours ago<b>magnoliabb</b> - 22 hours ago<b>evilamoebaattack</b> - yesterday at 12:39am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - yesterday at 10:10pm<b>Zoldyck</b> - yesterday at 5:19pm<b>WizardlyUnicorn</b> - yesterday at 9:12am<b>CanadiAnM8</b> - yesterday at 8:14am<b>wildcats14327</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 1:07am<b>Csoi</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:08pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 7:55pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 7:31pm<b>TheNiceOne</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 10:24am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 9:56pm<b>Paulcs</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 8:05am<b>db32</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 2:45am

Fucked!<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - yesterday at 4:10am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 2:37pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 7:13am<b>AnonymousBella</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 1:40am<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 8:08pm<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 4:26am<b>itsSkyyyyyy</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 12:49pm<b>ilovefood17</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 12:15pm<b>mds9986</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 9:07am<b>SubparAtBest</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 10:53am<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 7:09am<b>Thoricsteam20</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 12:23pm<b>khorstmye</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 3:25am<b>guardloverz123</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 3:06pm<b>hayleymaybe</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 7:11pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 4:19pm<b>knobatnight</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 2:31am<b>asspole</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 1:03pm

MrSassypants's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML

#21450341
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6210) - you deserved it (1266)

On 08/01/2015 at 4:29am - animals - by funnnyyyyy -_- (woman) - Nepal

Today, on my second day at my new job, a customer called my manager with a complaint about me. He said I put the cheese "upside down" on his sandwich, and that made it taste bad. FML

Today, my parents sent me to the hospital because they thought I had diabetes. One of the symptoms is that you a pee a lot. The only reason I go to the bathroom so often is so I can masturbate. FML

#21449844
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12984) - you deserved it (19596)

On 07/31/2015 at 1:38am - intimacy - by doodoobref - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was detained for trying to "illegally enter" my house, all because my parents forgot to tell me they were being evicted. FML

#21449546
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22140) - you deserved it (1299)

On 07/30/2015 at 1:38pm - misc - by College_Grad (woman) -

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to listen to my grandma talk about how she's "allergic" to toilet paper, and how she lets nature "take care of it". FML

#21449508
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20271) - you deserved it (1366)

On 07/30/2015 at 11:30am - health - by WhatTheFuck - United States (Illinois)

Today, while waiting for an interview at the career that I've been spending months tailoring my résumé for, I was thrown up on by my only competitor. Guess who got the job. FML

#21448834
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22432) - you deserved it (1442)

On 07/28/2015 at 10:55pm - work - by smellslikeahangover - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML

#21448078
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23385) - you deserved it (2422)

On 07/27/2015 at 2:55pm - love - by Afroman720 (man) - United States

Today, I was pouring my heart out to my dad about how I'm such a loser and how I have no friends. He listened sympathetically, until his phone buzzed with a text message. He said "Balls, the guys from work wanna get shitfaced." and took a rain check on me. FML

#21447515
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22335) - you deserved it (2452)

On 07/26/2015 at 1:29pm - misc - by arch maester shavayalsharashion (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames)

Today, my girlfriend called me and said she needs to take a break from our relationship. Why? Her really clingy ex is really depressed about her dating someone else and he isn't ready to accept it. So she wants to take a break "for his sake" until he's over her. FML

#21447496
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23752) - you deserved it (1949)

On 07/26/2015 at 12:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Finland (Western Finland)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to go on a date with me tomorrow. His reaction was to pick up a banana and pretend that he was in the middle of a phone call. FML

#21447183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21674) - you deserved it (2217)

On 07/25/2015 at 8:22pm - love - by Lucachoo - United States (California)

Today, I was hanging out with my neighbor. He asked me if I wanted to play Twister, and I said no because I thought it would be weird. What was his response? "C'mon. You can leave if it gets sexual". FML

Today, the AC broke at work. I work in a hotel and every single guest asked me if I knew how hot it was in the lobby. It was 96 degrees for 7 hours. I definitely knew. FML

Today, I received a text with my last name spelled wrong. A short conversation revealed he got my number from me, through Tinder. I don't have an account, but he insisted he knew that I like it 'hard and rough'. He knew my first name. I still don't know how he got my phone number or name. FML

#21444252
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24466) - you deserved it (1683)

On 07/19/2015 at 11:00pm - intimacy - by creepedout (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I spent hours cooking a big dinner for my parents for the first time. I guess I made the steak too rare, because when my dad cut into it, he said "Christ! This thing's practically alive!" and said a skilled vet could probably bring the cow it was cut from back to life. FML

#21443824
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21411) - you deserved it (3368)

On 07/19/2015 at 1:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while trying to score a date, I almost made a girl pass out. No, I didn't try to chloroform this one. I just came across as so pathetic that she laughed hard enough to have an asthma attack. FML

#21443788
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24124) - you deserved it (2679)

On 07/18/2015 at 11:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)



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