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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

25Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 19032
  • Number of comments : 1955
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : Hello there! My, oh my, don't you look good today!? Dang, male/female/human/alien/4thDimensional creature visiting my profile, you look stunning!

Anyways, my name is Kevin, and I use this app when I am bored, meaning all the time so I'm online often. My favorite color is yellow. I like Oreos. I like all types of music, except the ones I hate, which is about all types of music. I like liking stuff. I dislike disliking stuff. Ya da ya da ya da, teenage stuff, blah blah blah, look at me brag and complain, gib gibby gibberish, I think I'm cooler than I actually am, whatever.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>Pegasustato</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Rozza17</b> - 11 hours ago<b>Fiorella1</b> - 14 hours ago<b>Mf2307</b> - 16 hours ago<b>Offisir</b> - 18 hours ago<b>foxwasalamb</b> - 22 hours ago<b>Juicenub</b> - yesterday at 1:02pm<b>lonedee</b> - yesterday at 12:45am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - yesterday at 11:37pm<b>Lustig_Junge</b> - yesterday at 11:18pm<b>buckstop1</b> - yesterday at 10:18pm<b>Auxxilary</b> - yesterday at 7:52pm<b>mt631</b> - yesterday at 7:32pm<b>dillonfi</b> - yesterday at 6:44pm<b>Danise_123</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 3:42pm<b>anonykinetic</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 3:17pm<b>lndala</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 3:12pm<b>mzhaze</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 2:49pm

Liked!<b>Fiorella1</b> - 8 hours ago<b>Duckzy</b> - yesterday at 5:44pm<b>Blade12337</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 1:21am<b>wasliedtoasakid</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 11:50pm<b>coyotefox</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 1:33pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm<b>Domdom96</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 1:14pm<b>leviheichou</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 7:11am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 5:04am<b>Robby4800</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 12:43am<b>Hiktmae</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 12:10am<b>WadeNickerson</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 9:48pm<b>BaDumTsss</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 1:06pm<b>quickit</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 5:39am<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 3:38pm<b>anonykinetic</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 5:53am<b>Enslaved</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 10:12pm<b>Jthewat</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:19pm

MrSassypants's FML badges

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This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I decorated my boyfriend's house for Christmas as a surprise, just in time for him and his family to come home. Also just in time for him to tell me he's Jewish. FML

#21322002
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9884) - you deserved it (3337)

On 12/22/2014 at 10:04am - love - by cwhitney7 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a customer came in with a laptop smashed beyond repair. She asked if we could recover her files, but thanks to my idiot boss' new store policy I had to ask her a bunch of questions, including if she had tried "turning it on and off". She stared at me, speechless, like I was a complete moron. FML

#21321539
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23009) - you deserved it (2480)

On 12/21/2014 at 2:08pm - work - by anonix (man) - Canada

Today, I was fired for "smelling like garbage". I'm the guy who throws the garbage into the truck. FML

Today, my parents had a loud argument over who is worse in bed. FML

#21320583
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24940) - you deserved it (1823)

On 12/19/2014 at 10:16pm - misc - by cantunhear - United States (New York)

Today, my date mugged me, just minutes after I paid our bill at the restaurant. FML

#21320485
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28155) - you deserved it (2170)

On 12/19/2014 at 6:27pm - money - by j4 - United Kingdom

Today, after six long, hard years of involuntary celibacy, I was finally about to get laid. Except it was just a dream, and in it my mom stormed in just as things got heated, called me a useless cunt, and told me to go do my chores. I guess my brain forgot I moved out years ago. FML

#21320480
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24794) - you deserved it (3026)

On 12/19/2014 at 6:14pm - intimacy - by giantblueballsthesizeofjohnnysinscock (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML

#21318606
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22781) - you deserved it (30351)

On 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm - health - by fuck - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, I woke up to the lovely sounds of goats having escaped their pen and climbed onto the roof. Again. FML

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Today, my Canadian friend is staying a few days at my parents' house. I drove him from the airport, only to find my idiot dad had decked the spare room out with maple syrup bottles. He keeps saying "eh" all the time and asked "What's he so upset aboot?" when my friend was offended. FML

#21316775
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29859) - you deserved it (2761)

On 12/13/2014 at 1:36pm - misc - by ehxtraordinarily pissed (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she's been cheating on me for the past two months. Apparently she thought I'd take it well, because when I yelled at her for being a heartless bitch, she stuttered "S-sike!" and tried to play it off as a prank. She's acting like we're still dating. FML

#21316716
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31451) - you deserved it (2458)

On 12/13/2014 at 11:19am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML

#21316711
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26883) - you deserved it (4984)

On 12/13/2014 at 11:03am - intimacy - by giantcuntflaps (woman) - Australia

Today, I finally told my boyfriend that he's not very good at dirty talk. He does it every time we have sex and it always turns me off. He started crying. FML

#21316697
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30614) - you deserved it (4995)

On 12/13/2014 at 10:20am - intimacy - by Nicole (woman) - United States

Today, after months of correcting him, I got so used to my boss calling me "Alex" that I didn't respond to my own name several times today. FML

Today, I asked my teacher how old he was, and jokingly I said, "50?" Then he chuckled, so I laughed and said, "I was kidding… 42, 43, 44?" He then looked at me and said, "Are you trying to guess my age, or your grade percent in this class?" FML

#21315734
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19971) - you deserved it (25362)

On 12/11/2014 at 6:13pm - work - by IHateSchool-.- - United States



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