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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

11Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 17681
  • Number of comments : 1917
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 18. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>HairIsEverything</b> - yesterday at 12:16pm<b>anonykinetic</b> - yesterday at 5:02am<b>blubje</b> - yesterday at 1:34am<b>dubb420</b> - yesterday at 10:36pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - yesterday at 10:20pm<b>failedgamer01</b> - yesterday at 8:13pm<b>KwtWaffles</b> - yesterday at 1:41pm<b>BowChikaFuckYou</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:13am<b>Schrypt</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 1:07am<b>Connerm</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 10:28pm<b>badoo</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 6:40pm<b>mkayden</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 4:50pm<b>Blade12337</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 10:44am<b>moophasa</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 12:17am<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 8:50pm<b>kittykat8770</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 7:48pm<b>LittleBuddy1</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 5:39pm<b>feven</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 4:45pm

Liked!<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 3:38pm<b>anonykinetic</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 5:53am<b>Enslaved</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 10:12pm<b>Jthewat</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:19pm<b>frances1942</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:36am<b>nix1993</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 1:20am<b>devildog562</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 5:28am<b>Prismo_Feeds</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 6:48am<b>hetalia_thailand</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 10:49pm<b>jhill5472</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:25pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 2:20pm

MrSassypants's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to check out a dating site, when I stumbled across my ex wife's profile. She'd had it for four out of the five years of our marriage. And no, it didn't rate us as a good match. FML

#21305183
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23240) - you deserved it (2450)

On 11/24/2014 at 1:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I met my best friend's girlfriend for the first time. After a few hours of talking and eating, she followed me to the bathroom and said, dead serious, ''If you ever touch him or get too close to him, I will cut you''. I've known him for twelve years, they have been dating for a month. FML

#21305050
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29191) - you deserved it (2106)

On 11/24/2014 at 8:44am - love - by ohwell (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was really excited to get a new bank account in my name. My parents wanted me to have it so they could transfer money from mine to theirs and vice versa. What excited me less was my father drunkenly accessing it and taking all my cash. FML

#21305033
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24224) - you deserved it (2986)

On 11/24/2014 at 7:40am - money - by ugh - United States (New York)

Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML

#21304373
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24673) - you deserved it (2215)

On 11/23/2014 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my coworker and I announced that we are spending our holidays together, because we both have kids. My boss announced he is coming with us. FML

#21303728
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26608) - you deserved it (3176)

On 11/22/2014 at 5:16am - work - by Carnage23 (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I noticed my fish was still hungry after feeding him earlier. I figured "ehh a little bit more won't kill him". I was wrong. FML

#21303699
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26563) - you deserved it (7505)

On 11/22/2014 at 2:22am - animals - by liishax3 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was studying for my Spanish midterm nonstop. After I closed my book, I was so tired that I thought that my cat was asking me questions in Spanish. FML

#21303629
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25827) - you deserved it (2989)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Studying is for crazy people. - United States (California)

Today, my five year old sister won't stop saying, "shit buckle fuckle ton." My boyfriend's excuse was that he was teaching her how to rhyme. FML

#21303585
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23574) - you deserved it (2472)

On 11/21/2014 at 10:29pm - kids - by angkal2002 - Australia

Today, I asked my dad if he thought my dress was nice, and if guys would go for me. He replied, "Shit, depends on how drunk they are." FML

#21303377
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29247) - you deserved it (3887)

On 11/21/2014 at 3:07pm - misc - by Veronica - United States (California)

Today, the girl I'd been dating online for 6 months told me she was a guy. I said it was alright, and that I was still in love. Then she confessed she really was a girl, and was just trying to make me dump her so she wouldn't be the "bad guy". FML

#21303306
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32535) - you deserved it (6133)

On 11/21/2014 at 1:18pm - love - by Recluse (man) -

Today, my supervisor was watching a video of his son. I heard a voice in the background and asked if it was Elmo. It was his wife. FML

#21302177
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29381) - you deserved it (4933)

On 11/19/2014 at 3:56pm - work - by bookworm - United States (Texas)

Today, I am 11 weeks pregnant and my husband has taken great glee in the fact that his horrible gas is enough to trigger my morning sickness. We're about to go on a long 12 hour drive. FML

#21302111
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29370) - you deserved it (2571)

On 11/19/2014 at 2:04pm - misc - by honeybunny - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML

#21302094
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29715) - you deserved it (5929)

On 11/19/2014 at 1:44pm - misc - by limpdick9 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend said "You're a real work of art. You know, the abstract kind that no one likes. Anyway, we need to break up." FML

#21302073
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34512) - you deserved it (3014)

On 11/19/2014 at 12:40pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was on a date, and I went to put my arm around her, trying to be romantic, but my coordination went straight to hell. Instead of her shoulder, I ended up accidentally grabbing her tit. FML

#21302056
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28062) - you deserved it (6874)

On 11/19/2014 at 12:03pm - love - by oops (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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