Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MrItalia

Search for a member

MrItalia

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1040
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MrItalia : Hey all.. Come say hello for a chat.
I'm pretty easy going happy person and enjoy having a laugh.

MrItalia's page activity

Visits<b>willow196</b> - 2 hours ago<b>buckstop1</b> - 10 hours ago<b>NicoleErin</b> - 16 hours ago<b>leeebeeeee18</b> - yesterday at 9:25am<b>saocrates</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 6:42pm<b>TaylorWhiteGirl</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 10:44pm<b>andiiibandiii526</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 5:28pm<b>xJAGx1505x</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 2:05pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:44pm<b>Peck_Kcep</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 12:07am<b>TcheQ</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 11:07pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 2:47pm<b>A07</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:53am<b>wdthompson1</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:05am<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 12:34am<b>eddyinfinity</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 10:06pm<b>Acacia21</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 5:52am<b>MissDarkness</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 6:39pm

MrItalia's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MrItalia's badges

MrItalia's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband wanted me to "spice up" our sex life. I guess he didn't count on me vomiting when he came in my mouth. We won't be getting intimate again for a long, long time now. FML

#20888582
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47386) - you deserved it (10553)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was lying naked on my boyfriend's bed for the first time ever. He glanced at me, then started playing with a Rubik's cube. FML

#20885155
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51032) - you deserved it (6174)

On 09/17/2013 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by someone (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that it's become a regular occurrence for my mother and me to talk about our pubic hair. I don't know which is worse: the fact that I know she shaves it, or the fact that we even talk about this stuff. FML

#20875739
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33858) - you deserved it (12353)

On 09/10/2013 at 1:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, even after loving him unconditionally, my originally 340 pound morbidly obese husband, who within the past two years lost almost 200 pounds, left me because now, he "can do so much better". FML

#20874079
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70773) - you deserved it (3963)

On 09/09/2013 at 3:19am - love - by heartbroken - United States (California)

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56068) - you deserved it (5978)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

#20862202
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41571) - you deserved it (3658)

On 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm - kids - by embarrassedmom - United States

Today, my little brother grabbed my boobs and wouldn't let go until I pried his hands off. When I told my mom, her response was, "Get over it. He's a little kid who doesn't know any better." He's 14 years old. FML

#20848790
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52429) - you deserved it (3275)

On 08/22/2013 at 12:48am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, as I was walking downstairs to get breakfast, I saw my parents had decided to have a quickie on the couch. I had to awkwardly stand out of sight on the stairs, too scared to go down, or even back up, because our stairs creak. FML

Today, I had a group presentation. I kept zipping my jacket up and down nervously. As I waited for my turn, I realized a bunch of classmates staring at me. I forgot that in the morning rush, I only put on a jacket. I only had a bra on underneath. FML

Today, my mom came into my room to give me a goodbye kiss. Due to the routine of my girlfriend doing the exact same thing in the exact same spot, I held the kiss way longer than what a mother/son kiss should last. My mom actually had to tell me to "let go". FML

#20839296
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34333) - you deserved it (26751)

On 08/15/2013 at 9:06pm - misc - by deadman (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my husband and I were fooling around, and things got heated. In the heat of things, I told him to tear my panties off. He took it literally and yanked at them with all his might. It's been two hours and I still can't walk straight. FML

#20827713
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47323) - you deserved it (17695)

On 08/08/2013 at 6:15pm - intimacy - by fuck my arse (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, my girlfriend was suspended from work after she was caught fucking one of her co-workers. FML

#20827542
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61417) - you deserved it (4590)

On 08/08/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Slough)

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

#20826932
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56150) - you deserved it (15826)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:10am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Latvia (Jelgavas)

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

#20816318
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51550) - you deserved it (11146)

On 08/02/2013 at 12:39am - intimacy - by whyeventry? (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I tried to give my husband a striptease for his birthday. I wound up tripping over my own panties and nearly dislocating my shoulder. FML

#20815680
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41917) - you deserved it (8538)

On 08/01/2013 at 6:29pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: