Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MrItalia

Search for a member

MrItalia

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1048
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MrItalia : Hey all.. Come say hello for a chat.
I'm pretty easy going happy person and enjoy having a laugh.

MrItalia's page activity

Visits<b>LEDZEPPALLTHEWAY</b> - 9 hours ago<b>willow196</b> - 22 hours ago<b>buckstop1</b> - yesterday at 11:22pm<b>NicoleErin</b> - yesterday at 5:59pm<b>leeebeeeee18</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 9:25am<b>saocrates</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 6:42pm<b>TaylorWhiteGirl</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 10:44pm<b>andiiibandiii526</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 5:28pm<b>xJAGx1505x</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 2:05pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:44pm<b>Peck_Kcep</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 12:07am<b>TcheQ</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 11:07pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 2:47pm<b>A07</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:53am<b>wdthompson1</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:05am<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 12:34am<b>eddyinfinity</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 10:06pm<b>Acacia21</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 5:52am

MrItalia's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MrItalia's badges

MrItalia's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML

#21217343
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52479) - you deserved it (40327)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:39pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

#21207695
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52709) - you deserved it (6796)

On 07/13/2014 at 3:46am - intimacy - by NoSexForMe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to tan naked in a secluded part of my yard, so I wouldn't get tan lines. I even felt adventurous enough to leave my bikini and towel inside. This idea backfired however when my mom stopped home from work, assumed I wasn't home, and locked all the doors before she left again. FML

#21207511
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41388) - you deserved it (13500)

On 07/13/2014 at 12:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I overheard my mother talking to her friend, and using me as an example of how it's sometimes best to swallow. FML

#21196146
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44432) - you deserved it (4571)

On 07/02/2014 at 11:54am - intimacy - by unwanted daughter (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

#21182128
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46836) - you deserved it (8108)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom, both naked from the waist down. Supposedly, he was trying to "teach her how to pee standing up." FML

#21159254
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58086) - you deserved it (8268)

On 06/01/2014 at 11:51am - intimacy - by help me - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my husband and I put our children to bed a little earlier than usual, so we could have some sexy time. Immediately following my full-blown orgasm, I rolled over, only to see my wide-eyed son peeking over the top of the mattress. FML

#21133668
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58006) - you deserved it (13036)

On 05/07/2014 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I locked myself out of my dorm room. I walked across campus, shoe-less and in nothing but my bathrobe, to find someone who could let me back in. Turns out I hadn't even shut the door properly and so it never actually locked. I can still hear the guy laughing at me. FML

#21120721
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34643) - you deserved it (12552)

On 04/23/2014 at 10:54am - misc - by killmenow (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, one of my most problematic students remained after class, whence he strongly insinuated his interest in receiving oral sex; I tried to convey just how inappropriate that was, when he interrupted, "Look, will you at least touch it?" FML

#21114779
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53945) - you deserved it (5637)

On 04/16/2014 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by MILF (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky, and I whispered that I love him. He immediately lost his boner, and a few minutes later "remembered" he had to be somewhere else. FML

#21111270
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43085) - you deserved it (6476)

On 04/12/2014 at 5:01pm - animals - by princess (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I called my mom to ask for some help with my dishwasher. Somehow, the call got turned into a video call. I was wearing a bathrobe, and she was naked in her bathroom. Most awkward call ever. FML

#21105694
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37452) - you deserved it (4513)

On 04/06/2014 at 2:57am - misc - by FaceTime issues - United States (Arizona)

Today, my husband and I had some bath time to ourselves. After having sex, he decided to put bath salts in my vagina to spice things up for the next round. It's been twenty minutes out of the bath and it still feels like there are pop rocks in my vagina. FML

#21101391
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43002) - you deserved it (32016)

On 03/31/2014 at 10:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my brother tried to pay me to teach him how to French-kiss, so he wouldn't screw up on his first date. I'm shocked that the weirdo managed to get a date in the first place. FML

#21094457
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40107) - you deserved it (4069)

On 03/23/2014 at 4:25pm - love - by doesn't fuck on the first, thank god (woman) - United Kingdom (Southend-on-Sea)

Today, about 10 minutes into my first jog in months, someone in a car started following me, yelling stuff like "Oh my god, it's Shamu!" and "Run faster, fatty!" I ended up breaking down in tears before he finally sped off, roaring with laughter. FML

#21090080
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53162) - you deserved it (4506)

On 03/18/2014 at 3:44pm - health - by see you next cunt (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend stormed out after I suggested to him that his relationship with his mother is maybe a little weird. Apparently having regular, hour-long phone discussions about your penis is a perfectly normal thing for a 23-year-old to have with his mother. FML

#21089774
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53063) - you deserved it (6484)

On 03/18/2014 at 5:14am - intimacy - by tiredofcrazy (woman) - Australia



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: