Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MrConcise

Online | Search for a member

MrConcise

116Fucked!

MrConciseMrConcise
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 December 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7582
  • Number of comments : 1039
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About MrConcise : ►► FML's Former Smartass Psuedointellectual

Though our troubles and woes are relentless and unforgiving, we may rejoice as we rekindle one another's flames to familiar vibrancy; we burn brightest with the strength of unity.

I'll always love you, buddy. RIP Luddy, 2003 - 2015. You were the best dog I've ever had, life won't be nearly as fulfilling without you.

"People say I should be more humble
I hope they understand, they don't listen when you mumble"
- Donald Glover aka Childish Gambino

I can count the number of profiles I've "fucked" on one hand.

MrConcise's page activity

Visits<b>dat_becky</b> - 9 hours ago<b>ironfey</b> - 14 hours ago<b>random_times1</b> - 18 hours ago<b>LyonDetreny</b> - 21 hours ago<b>Katerchen</b> - yesterday at 7:39am<b>ThatOneGuyKy</b> - yesterday at 6:26am<b>Pingvinai</b> - yesterday at 5:33am<b>ohmissjane</b> - yesterday at 5:22am<b>Chrissyella</b> - yesterday at 2:52am<b>lmfao789</b> - yesterday at 11:38pm<b>carlfirebolt</b> - yesterday at 9:20pm<b>e077</b> - yesterday at 5:15pm<b>Jpav1</b> - yesterday at 2:21pm<b>jokeralex816</b> - yesterday at 1:42pm<b>whatsittoyabuddy</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 8:11pm<b>kattykat1</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 7:53pm<b>jake_foster</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 6:02pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 5:45pm

Fucked!<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 12:01pm<b>IDontEvenCarexx</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 9:52am<b>jaydots</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 3:07pm<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 8:50am<b>anotherhuman</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 6:29am<b>mshitauro</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 8:49am<b>kuhtrinuh</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 3:16am<b>lurker_no_more</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:17pm<b>omgwthilu</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 11:09pm<b>Sadafou00</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 8:21pm<b>StargazeKitsune</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 8:23am<b>tanishpradhan</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 7:40am<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 6:26am<b>summergirl69</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 6:03am<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 5:55am<b>nana_star</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:19pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:09am<b>joe_H135</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 4:24pm

MrConcise's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of MrConcise's badges

MrConcise's favorite FMLs

Today, someone walking my way started waving. I waved back until I realized he wasn't looking at me. To make things worse, while walking past he said, "Get a fucking friend." FML

#21353961
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34717) - you deserved it (3123)

On 02/11/2015 at 8:39am - misc - by TJFuentes (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my bed fell through my floor. With me on it. FML

#21352624
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34811) - you deserved it (3322)

On 02/09/2015 at 8:26am - misc - by wtf?? - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines

Today, while shopping with my 6-year-old daughter, she said, "Mommy, remember you wanna get duck tape!" A middle-aged guy nearby scoffed and told her: "DUCT, not DUCK. Dumb cunt." I ended up having to drive my bawling daughter home with no shopping. FML

#21352119
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43569) - you deserved it (2996)

On 02/08/2015 at 2:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I was awoken by the sound of my pet lizard eating my other pet lizard. FML

Today, hours after being turned down for sex, I woke up to my boyfriend sitting at the computer, jacking off to a picture of my deceased mom. FML

#21351381
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49490) - you deserved it (4193)

On 02/07/2015 at 6:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a big figure skating competition. Many of the girls before me fell or did not execute their jumps correctly. Me? I skated a flawless program. I was placed last because they said I didn't push myself hard enough to the point of falling. FML

#21351174
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38562) - you deserved it (2545)

On 02/06/2015 at 9:35pm - misc - by depressedskatergirl - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I can't decide what's worse: the fact that my mother found my vibrator or that, as a prank, she replaced it with a realistic tarantula replica. She won't tell me where it is. FML

#21351119
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26732) - you deserved it (4203)

On 02/06/2015 at 7:57pm - misc - by go fuck myself - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend tried to justify having a one night stand with some other guy, with the words, "I'm on my period, okay?!" She acted like I was crazy when I asked how the fuck that made any sense. FML

#21350975
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32546) - you deserved it (2104)

On 02/06/2015 at 3:10pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend told her parents that she's pregnant. We have never even come close to having sex, but she told them I'm the father. Not only is my girlfriend cheating on me, but her father now wants me dead. FML

#21350891
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37751) - you deserved it (2876)

On 02/06/2015 at 11:56am - love - by that guy - United States (California)

Today, I'm here to inform men that, "If I fucked you, I wouldn't pull out" is not an effective pick up line. Ever. Especially on a coworker. FML

#21349737
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33788) - you deserved it (5477)

On 02/04/2015 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by No thank you (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML

#21349028
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34478) - you deserved it (2335)

On 02/03/2015 at 1:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wyoming)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to give me a naked massage. She straddled my back and started rubbing, then she sneezed and peed on me. FML

#21348755
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40495) - you deserved it (4187)

On 02/02/2015 at 11:36pm - love - by bootyislife - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend "accidentally" had sex with my roommate. FML

#21348376
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44797) - you deserved it (3223)

On 02/02/2015 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by itsemilyc - United States (Michigan)

Today, my Breaking Bad obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks." during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML

#21347719
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30420) - you deserved it (3305)

On 02/01/2015 at 11:17am - intimacy - by SKYYYLLLARRRR!!!! (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that, due to the walls at my uni dorm being ridiculously thin, my entire flat overheard me lose my virginity. Spanking and all. FML

#21344108
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27743) - you deserved it (8360)

On 01/25/2015 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by Orgasmataz (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: