Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MitunaCaptor

Online | Search for a member

MitunaCaptor

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 July 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3120
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About MitunaCaptor : Predictably unpredictable.
I'm still afraid of the toaster popping.
Its hard for me to talk to people so if you message me please understand the delay; I'll eventually get myself to respond.

MitunaCaptor's page activity

Visits<b>flupsht</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 9:13am<b>bloodlusthatter</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 4:07pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 10:53am<b>lolo717</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 10:59pm<b>kcoffey_69</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 5:12am<b>fastman19</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 7:00am<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 11:41am<b>charrbee90</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 5:50am<b>firecracker5</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 10:28pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 11:37am<b>ramman43</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 12:12pm<b>twye</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 3:08pm<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 6:09am<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 9:27am<b>homesuckfucker</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 11:00pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 7:58pm<b>gamernation89</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 6:00pm<b>LeBandit</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 2:59pm

Fucked!<b>bloodlusthatter</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 10:07pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 5:33pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 5:38pm<b>ramman43</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 6:12pm

MitunaCaptor's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of MitunaCaptor's badges

MitunaCaptor's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into my dad straightening my dog's fur. His excuse? The dog needed to feel pretty. FML

#20513110
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29994) - you deserved it (4030)

On 02/19/2013 at 2:01am - animals - by xtammyle - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38854) - you deserved it (3078)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML

#20505985
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13285) - you deserved it (54808)

On 02/14/2013 at 2:39am - misc - by assoutofuandme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got married on Skyrim. To an elf. While in real life, my love life is floundering like a half-dead carp in the surf on a hot day. So much so in fact that I actually draw a measure of comfort from being married to an elf. FML

#20501864
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24294) - you deserved it (9645)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19am - love - by mr_loveless (man) - United States

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

#20490478
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23675) - you deserved it (35927)

On 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Brock (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

#20482313
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38678) - you deserved it (2543)

On 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm - kids - by andy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I played an intense paintball match, with me and my friends versus my boyfriend and his buddies. When we won, my boyfriend went mental and said he only lost because of "lag". When I pointed out we weren't in a video game, he reacted by firing a paintball straight into my chest. FML

#20478409
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37564) - you deserved it (5455)

On 01/25/2013 at 5:19pm - health - by LagSwitchFTW (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend complimented me on my ass. Before I could say thanks, she continued by commenting that she wouldn't mind "breaking it in". FML

#20478275
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35249) - you deserved it (5960)

On 01/25/2013 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by great (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum". I'm only 26 years old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML

#20473479
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38291) - you deserved it (2412)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:16pm - kids - by Female (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I have to take a midterm, which is worth a large part of my grade. All our teacher has taught us so far is how to roast s'mores over a Bunsen burner, and how to make gummy bears explode. Our test is on kinetics. FML

#20471562
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31264) - you deserved it (3574)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I realised in the middle of my shift how useless my deodorant is in the stifling heatwave spreading through my country. It's no longer effective against my awful B.O., which is a problem because I'm a mascot, and my costume traps the smell inside like a portable toilet. FML

#20469816
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30399) - you deserved it (4690)

On 01/20/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML

#20451560
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32294) - you deserved it (9006)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia

Today, my dad made a voodoo doll out of a melon. This seems to happen a lot. FML

#20449532
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22938) - you deserved it (2538)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34534) - you deserved it (2787)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I saw Les Misérables. I was singing along to one of the songs when the guy next to me dumped his soda over my head and told me to shut up. FML

#20447311
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17981) - you deserved it (95832)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:34am - misc - by maddiecat - United States (Missouri)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: