About MitunaCaptor : Predictably unpredictable.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I auditioned for a role in ballet. My stomach was in pain and as I ran to be lifted into the air by my partner, I let out a huge fart. The auditorium was dead silent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30905) - you deserved it (2880)
On 12/29/2012 at 4:32am - misc - by gassy - United States (Washington)
Today, I realized something: when other people are drunk, they dance around and make out with people. When I'm drunk, I apparently think it's a great idea to chew on electrical cords. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13442) - you deserved it (19521)
On 12/29/2012 at 2:30am - misc - by almostkilledmyself - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I woke up with an engagement ring on my left hand. The same one I refused last month. My boyfriend apparently waited for me to be drunk to propose again last night, and has already posted the pics on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30874) - you deserved it (10201)
On 12/28/2012 at 10:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32151) - you deserved it (6013)
On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States
Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32582) - you deserved it (2148)
On 12/24/2012 at 10:20pm - misc - by Julie (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I had to slowly explain to my mother that Americans are not the only people who celebrate Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24649) - you deserved it (2218)
On 12/24/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11396) - you deserved it (24435)
On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45270) - you deserved it (7295)
On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I looked at my neighbor's empty lawn; he's an old guy and he usually has the best Christmas lights. We knew he might not be able to do them this year, so I felt bad and I did them for him. Later, a neighbor asked about them and I told her that I helped out. She said, "You do know he died, right?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26835) - you deserved it (13117)
On 12/21/2012 at 11:00am - misc - by Syd - United States (Texas)
Today, the highly intoxicated singer of my band decided it would be a wonderful idea to squat down and take a shit on stage in the middle of a gig. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31528) - you deserved it (3278)
On 12/20/2012 at 3:16am - misc - by dudeyouarefired -
Today, someone painted the "Dark Mark" on the side of my car. It won't come off and my kids refuse to get in because it means "a wizard died in there." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27675) - you deserved it (3160)
On 12/19/2012 at 9:59am - kids - by spellbound - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23959) - you deserved it (2661)
On 12/19/2012 at 12:16am - health - by Igor (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, some beefed-up guy wearing a wife-beater sat in my restaurant, took out a big sack of coins, and played My Little Pony songs on the jukebox for 4 hours straight. I couldn't summon the courage to tell him to leave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16664) - you deserved it (3690)
On 12/15/2012 at 7:57pm - work - by lingling (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was on a crowded bus when the woman behind me vomited. The guy next to her was a sympathy puker. So were 3 other people. There was no room to escape. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22510) - you deserved it (1106)
On 12/14/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by MiscHats (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14282) - you deserved it (5018)
On 12/09/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by HOLY SHIT, A WALKING SNOWGLOBE (man) - United Kingdom (Barking and Dagenham)
Monday 17 June 2013
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