Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MitunaCaptor

Offline (the 08/27/2015 at 10:12pm) | Search for a member

MitunaCaptor

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 July 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3192
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About MitunaCaptor : Predictably unpredictable.
I'm still afraid of the toaster popping.
Its hard for me to talk to people so if you message me please understand the delay; I'll eventually get myself to respond.

MitunaCaptor's page activity

Visits<b>flupsht</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 9:13am<b>bloodlusthatter</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 4:07pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 10:53am<b>lolo717</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 10:59pm<b>kcoffey_69</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 5:12am<b>fastman19</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 7:00am<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 11:41am<b>charrbee90</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 5:50am<b>firecracker5</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 10:28pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 11:37am<b>ramman43</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 12:12pm<b>twye</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 3:08pm<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 6:09am<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 9:27am<b>homesuckfucker</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 11:00pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 7:58pm<b>gamernation89</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 6:00pm<b>LeBandit</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 2:59pm

Fucked!<b>bloodlusthatter</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 10:07pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 5:33pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 5:38pm<b>ramman43</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 6:12pm

MitunaCaptor's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of MitunaCaptor's badges

MitunaCaptor's favorite FMLs

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

#21365639
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30723) - you deserved it (3338)

On 03/01/2015 at 1:05am - misc - by mszoe - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

#21300031
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28613) - you deserved it (3350)

On 11/16/2014 at 4:44am - love - by tine - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while giving directions to a blind guy, I accidentally made him walk into a wall. FML

#21261532
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32618) - you deserved it (7723)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:14pm - misc - by camerashyguy - United States (Texas)

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

#21261205
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34828) - you deserved it (4402)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31916) - you deserved it (18307)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I went out with my best friend to McDonald's for a late night snack. Turns out she lied to me and just used me to pick up the boy she likes so they could go stargazing. I'm now laying beside them as they look at the stars and make out. I just want fries. FML

#21249351
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45320) - you deserved it (4755)

On 08/31/2014 at 10:55pm - love - by emilyparker - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a guy in my class was talking about himself. He started his story with, "When I was little, I was a ginger." I replied without thinking, "Is that why you got put up for adoption?" Him being adopted was the actual story he wanted to tell. FML

#21246134
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20261) - you deserved it (151)

On 08/26/2014 at 11:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

#21008430
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42906) - you deserved it (10053)

On 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm - health - by beemove (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, a man started a deep conversation with me at the bus stop about life, death, and the miracles of things we take for granted every day. I was really enjoying it until he looked at his watch and said, "Oh shit, mushrooms make me lose track of time!" and ran off into the night. FML

#20998821
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41589) - you deserved it (4654)

On 12/20/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by whatjusthappened (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33493) - you deserved it (15691)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

#20949272
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53710) - you deserved it (5600)

On 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Derry)

Today, while I was working out, I was listening to music with my earbuds in. The Pokémon theme started playing and I begun singing along. It wasn't too long after that I remembered I was in a crowded gym on a military base. FML

#20940589
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37516) - you deserved it (10687)

On 10/31/2013 at 7:18pm - misc - by GymBattle (man) - United States

Today, my mother kept nagging at me because my 9-month-old daughter only calms down when I play her metal. She demands I use gospel, otherwise she will turn into a "devil-worshipping lunatic like her mother". FML

#20915864
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44727) - you deserved it (4870)

On 10/10/2013 at 11:04pm - kids - by SlapAndTickle - United States

Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML

#20908715
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45134) - you deserved it (3816)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:34pm - animals - by animal lover... -



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: