Miss_Kristen

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Miss_Kristen

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 February 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2860
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Miss_Kristen : Every saint has a past, every sinner has a future.

Miss_Kristen's page activity

Visits<b>westernspykolya</b> - the 09/10/2016 at 12:05pm<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 7:33pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 10:06pm<b>smrn95</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 3:47pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 8:09pm<b>sanchogrim</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 10:46pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 11:05am<b>Ninjahiga</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 11:11pm<b>edenxero</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 3:31am<b>172pilot</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 11:10am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 2:35pm<b>kianabanannna</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 9:44am<b>tardisseeker</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:00pm<b>MrPlamen</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 8:00am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 4:27pm<b>Scarface408</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 5:21am<b>TiddlesWiddles</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 8:19am<b>VeganDarkLight</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 10:19pm

Fucked!<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 1:33am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 1:46pm

Miss_Kristen's FML badges

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Miss_Kristen's badges

Miss_Kristen's favorite FMLs

Today, my entire extended family was over for Christmas. I opened a gift to see that it was a fruitcake and saw everyone looking at me, smiling. This is their way to tell me that they know I'm gay and that they accept me. I'm straight. FML

by notgay / 12/25/2009 at 2:34pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the cinema. There was a really tall woman in front of me and whenever I leaned to the right or left she would lean to the same side I do. Later, she started laughing. They guy next to her was telling her where I moved. FML

by Mogg / 12/18/2009 at 3:42am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sneezed in the shower. When I got out, I got a text from my creepy old neighbor saying "Bless you". FML

by errrmkl46 / 12/02/2009 at 1:25am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, while on the phone with a client at work, I was planning on saying either "Yeah." or "Uh-huh." Without thinking, I combined the two and ended up saying "Yee-hah," like a cowboy. FML

by Jen / 12/01/2009 at 12:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 7:11am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was putting on my new pair of jeans, when my girlfriend walked in. She found the "XS" size sticker on the side of my pants, held it for a little while then put it on my crotch. She then looked at me, gave a little shrug and half-smile and walked away. FML

by just_a_bit_akwRd / 08/04/2009 at 12:15am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, three women came into my work and one was wearing a shirt with a rainbow that said, "We are everywhere". I had just gotten what it was referring to and when I greeted them I ended up saying "Hi gays!" instead of the standard "Hi guys". FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2009 at 6:46am / United States (California) / Work

Today, we were visiting my great-grandma, who has Alzheimer’s. We spent most of the day with her and she didn't know who we all were. Time came for us to leave so when I gave her a hug good-bye, she whispered into my ear, "You're my type." FML

by KarlwithaK / 05/18/2009 at 11:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a 'damn fine ass'. I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML

by elevator-troubles / 03/18/2009 at 3:59am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML

by jessica / 02/17/2009 at 6:56pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, a co-worker asked me if I had a comb he could borrow. I'm bald. FML

by poisonhand / 01/14/2009 at 10:32am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I went on a walk. I like to crush acorns as I go. One nut was actually a piece of dog poop. FML

by Elizabeth / 01/09/2009 at 6:40am / United States (Texas) / Animals