Miss_Kristen

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Miss_Kristen

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 February 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2647
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Miss_Kristen : Every saint has a past, every sinner has a future.

Miss_Kristen's page activity

Visits<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 10:06pm<b>smrn95</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 3:47pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 8:09pm<b>sanchogrim</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 10:46pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 11:05am<b>Ninjahiga</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 11:11pm<b>edenxero</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 3:31am<b>172pilot</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 11:10am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 2:35pm<b>kianabanannna</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 9:44am<b>tardisseeker</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:00pm<b>MrPlamen</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 8:00am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 4:27pm<b>Scarface408</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 5:21am<b>TiddlesWiddles</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 8:19am<b>VeganDarkLight</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 10:19pm<b>ZelmaSlayer</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 6:56pm<b>waffleeater_153</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 6:29pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 1:46pm

Miss_Kristen's FML badges

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Miss_Kristen's badges

Miss_Kristen's favorite FMLs

Today, my step dad stole over $400 worth of savings from me. He spent it on alcohol, fireworks, and a very large sombrero. FML

by _TaToRtOt_ / 07/18/2011 at 9:08am / United States (Virginia) / Money

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

by Lame / 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, I had to give a reference for a former employee. I tried to say he was always willing to give us a hand on the job. Instead, I said he was always willing to give us hand-jobs. FML

by Username / 06/01/2011 at 8:35am / Canada / Work

Today, I was at Walmart with my mom, when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML

by nicknick2 / 05/18/2011 at 12:08pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

­Today, my dog decided to fly through the front door like Superman. All 180lbs of her promptly slammed sideways into the wall, putting a dog-sized hole in the plaster. FML

by a man / 04/10/2011 at 3:32pm / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

by insomnitude / 03/05/2011 at 1:55am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. I had awful diarrhea and was almost done, when I noticed a spider on the ground. Being terrified, I took a giant ball of toilet paper to kill it. I realized then that I had no toilet paper left to use. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2011 at 12:45am / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, I went to the grocery store with my mom's boyfriend. We were in the bread aisle when he picked up a loaf that was in my hand, and said, "No, no, you have to FEEL the bread," and started rubbing it all over his body. He's moving in next week. FML

by Anonymous / 01/15/2011 at 12:39pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML

by stifledbyyou / 12/11/2010 at 7:06pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, I learned the hard way that leaving eye drops in your car all day makes them scorching hot. FML

by Username / 10/08/2010 at 5:30pm / Health

Today, my boyfriend found out I have OCD. When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other or I freak. After I brushed his face with the back of my hand he tackled me to the floor, held me down, and laughed at me while I panicked and tried to touch him with my other hand. FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2010 at 2:29am / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

by fartwoman / 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I brought my new girlfriend over to show off to my family when my senile great-grandmother walked into the room wearing nothing but her underpants asking when the Olympics come on. FML

by unfortunate419 / 02/17/2010 at 2:30am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, after a 9 hour train journey through the Polish mountains, I mistook a small black and white cat for a penguin. FML

by saintmichi / 01/31/2010 at 7:21pm / Poland (Malopolskie) / Transportation