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MinatoArisato

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MinatoArisato

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : New York, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 February 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1433
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

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MinatoArisato's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my dog's new favorite game to play : "If you don't stop petting me, I'll bite your balls as hard as I can." FML

#21416427
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9397) - you deserved it (1231)

On 05/27/2015 at 12:29am - animals - by FMLintheanus (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got so used to using this FML app while going to the bathroom that when I opened it, I accidentally peed a little. FML

#21415171
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22419) - you deserved it (8841)

On 05/24/2015 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, I checked my son's browser history, as he's been acting strangely around his computer recently. I found several bizarre Google searches, including but not limited to: "unicorn dick-farts", "sharting kittens", and "can you get AIDS from Asians?" What the fuck is wrong with him? FML

#21414033
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24909) - you deserved it (3952)

On 05/22/2015 at 2:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I found out my mom put breast milk in my cereal until I was 7 years old. FML

#21413959
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28953) - you deserved it (2645)

On 05/22/2015 at 11:17am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend of a week showed me her talent: shooting milk out of her vagina across the room. Goodbye dairy products. FML

#21413854
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26075) - you deserved it (3059)

On 05/22/2015 at 2:55am - intimacy - by zzarzzur (man) - United States (California)

Today, some guy walked into the restaurant I work at and ordered enough food to serve the entire National Guard of Texas. He thanked us by leaving a $0.50 tip and shitting on the bathroom floor. FML

#21413064
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25622) - you deserved it (1613)

On 05/20/2015 at 2:40pm - work - by kmctl - United States (California)

Today, I had the most rancid fart. My dog woke up from his nap and bit me as punishment. FML

#21412078
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24513) - you deserved it (7001)

On 05/18/2015 at 4:40pm - misc - by Swabidizop - United States (Colorado)

Today, one of my idiot co-workers thought it'd be hilarious to "fix" my car while I was working. Now every time I step on the brake pedal, the horn goes off. FML

#21412007
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27748) - you deserved it (2290)

On 05/18/2015 at 2:41pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

#21411735
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26357) - you deserved it (3944)

On 05/17/2015 at 10:54pm - intimacy - by fuckingdonuts - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had the most excitement I have felt in the last two months when I went to a drugstore and they had my favourite bandaids. FML

#21410948
68 comments

Today, I was supporting my aunt as she gave birth. She was getting tired during the pushing stage, so I tried to encourage her by making a show of pushing as well with each contraction. I got a little too into it and accidentally gave birth to a little turd of my own. FML

Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML

#21408378
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30970) - you deserved it (4767)

On 05/11/2015 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

#21406764
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18289) - you deserved it (34631)

On 05/08/2015 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I finally worked up the courage to tell my dad about my worries for my mental health. He then told me about the tracking device the aliens had implanted in his hand when they abducted him. There's nothing like family. FML



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