Melofa

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Melofa

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 December 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2694
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Melofa : Hi :)

Melofa's page activity

Visits<b>molloy2</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 10:58am<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 8:11am<b>Tomfire9</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 12:00am<b>HerpaderpGlaze</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 11:50am<b>rob02</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 4:31am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 6:44pm<b>blackwidowtaco</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 4:06am<b>b4dah15</b> - the 03/22/2013 at 11:22am<b>Douggiedog</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 5:55pm<b>VannahJane</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 1:27am<b>rickaashe</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 7:31pm<b>Wiringify</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 3:32pm<b>DazzedKarent</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 2:29pm<b>martinez121797</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 12:32pm<b>pradip</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 12:27pm<b>olis64</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 11:13am<b>tygerarmy</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 10:34pm

Melofa's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of Melofa's badges

Melofa's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was getting intimate with my husband, he moaned someone else's name. He actually tried to explain himself by saying that he'd had a "divine encounter," and while "possessed by the Lord," he'd been told the name of our future daughter. FML

by lils / 08/05/2012 at 1:45pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, while attempting the Italian Chandelier with my girlfriend, I heard a popping noise, and then had a sharp pain in my dick. Turns out I "broke" it. Instead of calling 911 immediately, my girlfriend remarked how my now black and blue penis looked like a Smurf. FML

by Anonymous / 08/05/2012 at 1:33am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking to the movie theatre with my boyfriend, when three guys muscled over and told us to hand over our phones. My boyfriend didn't waste any time pushing past me and running like hell, leaving me in tears and almost having a panic attack. FML

by Anonymous / 07/30/2012 at 4:02pm / Ukraine (Kyyiv) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML

by soph511 / 07/30/2012 at 2:05pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Animals

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

by tuggernuts / 07/17/2012 at 11:32am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my dad was driving me home and was angrily explaining how my boyfriend was a bad influence and that he was hanging out with the wrong crowd. After finally convincing him to give him another chance, we stopped at a traffic light just in time to see my boyfriend being chased by police. FML

by Jenna / 07/03/2012 at 7:20pm / United Kingdom (Reading) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm / Intimacy

Today, I exchanged pictures with a guy I met online, whose devotion to his family really impressed me. In his picture, he was wearing clown makeup, holding a huge knife to his throat with one hand, and an ICP album in the other. All this with a psychopathic grin on his face. FML

by probablydeadbymidnight / 07/01/2012 at 6:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking dirty with someone on the phone, when at one point I said, "Oh yeah, you like that?" She responded, "I can't actually feel anything you know, we're just on the phone." FML

by talkingtoaretard / 01/25/2012 at 12:00am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML

by actor my ass / 01/21/2012 at 5:44pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I had to cancel my birthday party because of snow. It's October. FML

by bethanygirl / 10/29/2011 at 3:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to cancel my birthday party because of snow. It's October. FML

by bethanygirl / 10/29/2011 at 3:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to cancel my birthday party because of snow. It's October. FML

by bethanygirl / 10/29/2011 at 3:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbour's boiler broke and flooded his home. To solve the problem, the water company shut off the neighbourhood's water supply while they fixed his boiler. I am now unable to shower, and I smell like a zoo animal. FML

by failure / 07/14/2011 at 12:24pm / Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister told me not to come over anymore because her baby is scared of my face. FML

by ugly / 06/26/2011 at 3:02am / United States / Kids