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Melofa

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Melofa

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 December 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1026
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Melofa : Hi :)

Melofa's page activity

Visits<b>rob02</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 4:31am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 6:44pm<b>blackwidowtaco</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 4:06am<b>b4dah15</b> - the 03/22/2013 at 11:22am<b>Douggiedog</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 5:55pm<b>VannahJane</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 1:27am<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 10:39pm<b>rickaashe</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 7:31pm<b>Wiringify</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 3:32pm<b>DazzedKarent</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 2:29pm<b>martinez121797</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 12:32pm<b>pradip</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 12:27pm<b>olis64</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 11:13am<b>tygerarmy</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 10:34pm

Melofa's FML badges

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of Melofa's badges

Melofa's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

#20417691
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55359) - you deserved it (9846)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had plans for a romantic night with my boyfriend, who is perfect in every way possible. We were going to have sex for the first time as well. Unfortunately, I had a dream last night about him shitting all over me and I can't look at him with a straight face. FML

#20403258
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35074) - you deserved it (13787)

On 12/17/2012 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. I went slowly to build up the excitement, and I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." and told me to stop embarrassing him. FML

#20399775
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33903) - you deserved it (8314)

On 12/14/2012 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by sucks at sucking (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)

Today, I smiled at a new kid and started a conversation with him, just to be nice. He later sent me 24 messages describing how strong his love for me is. I'm scared to go to school tomorrow. FML

#20200101
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29245) - you deserved it (3237)

On 12/11/2012 at 3:39am - love - by you're just creepy. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I had to do a presentation in front of my entire school. I was very nervous, so I used the old trick of picturing everyone naked. Everyone then got a good view of my erection. FML

#20199177
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35053) - you deserved it (14535)

On 12/10/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at school, I have to do a 45 minute presentation with a girl who has panic attacks so bad that she cries, runs out of the room, and sometimes passes out. This presentation terrifies her and it's a major part of my final grade. FML

#20192286
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22106) - you deserved it (2013)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by Murlocmurk - United States

Today, my guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML

#20187578
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29409) - you deserved it (2209)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:03am - love - by Anna - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26709) - you deserved it (2912)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML

#20176354
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34171) - you deserved it (10893)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:54am - intimacy - by ladylol (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML

#20174722
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47122) - you deserved it (13985)

On 11/23/2012 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Embarassed (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat, he also got inside the car and sat next to my date, pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back to the house. My mom laughed and gave him $20. It was a dare. FML

Today, my best friend got engaged to the guy she's been seeing for five years. He also happens to be the man I've been in love with for eight. As she was giving me the details, she nonchalantly gave me her reason for accepting the proposal: "Why the hell not, there's always divorce." FML

#20149647
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24705) - you deserved it (3812)

On 11/05/2012 at 9:48pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, at archery practice, I jokingly said that I'd kiss the next person to get a bullseye. They all made a point of missing their targets, some even shooting their arrows way off to the side. FML

#20146224
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20581) - you deserved it (6829)

On 11/03/2012 at 8:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks to me, all I could think about was how I could seduce my therapist. I think I still need a lot of help. FML

#20133155
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19980) - you deserved it (5066)

On 10/25/2012 at 7:09pm - love - by mental - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

#20132312
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23726) - you deserved it (16460)

On 10/25/2012 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States



FML's blog

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  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

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