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MauriceWinifred

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MauriceWinifred

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 10 July 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4074
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About MauriceWinifred : Hola, me hablo espanol

MauriceWinifred's page activity

Visits<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 3:50am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:15pm<b>SarahSehhati</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 10:54pm<b>eminemineminem</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 7:40pm<b>Mipam</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 12:29pm<b>amadeclton</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 10:21am<b>frozenlover218</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 1:28pm<b>SailorSolaris</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 1:52am<b>tailyerd</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 8:39pm<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 2:02pm<b>tigerisabelle</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 9:13pm<b>amonk</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 11:39pm<b>joliexoxo</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:02pm<b>AE101</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 6:40pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 4:32pm<b>DepartmentStore</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 4:31pm<b>abattior</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 10:34pm<b>swell_belle</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 5:22am

MauriceWinifred's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

MauriceWinifred's favorite FMLs

Today, my father who left my family over 10 years ago and never contacted us or paid child support, poked me on Facebook. FML

#15209199
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57506) - you deserved it (3680)

On 03/05/2011 at 7:24pm - misc - by poked - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

#15203950
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36716) - you deserved it (12476)

On 03/05/2011 at 1:55am - misc - by insomnitude (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was paired up with a partner in my film class. He has an idea for a film: "Shoot an onion from all angles, light it on fire, and roll it down a hill". He was dead serious. I'm stuck with this guy for the whole year. FML

#15076677
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27897) - you deserved it (3685)

On 02/22/2011 at 9:28am - work - by Dean Heffern -

Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML

#14990668
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46229) - you deserved it (13262)

On 02/15/2011 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46849) - you deserved it (9273)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML

#14738365
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45783) - you deserved it (5505)

On 01/27/2011 at 11:35pm - misc - by Scaredwitless (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a friend and I saw some deer outside my car. Since we were both leaving for college the next day we wanted to do something memorable so we decided to chase the deer. Turns out the deer wanted to chase us too. We ran for over five minutes screaming. FML

#14670842
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7150) - you deserved it (47900)

On 01/22/2011 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out I have a huge infected boil on my vagina. The worst part was that I wasn't the one to discover this. My boyfriend was. FML

#14665942
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33479) - you deserved it (9046)

On 01/21/2011 at 8:27pm - intimacy - by alaskan1989 - United States (Alaska)

Today, it was my daughter's birthday. She had been wanting a cat for a long time, so I went to the animal shelter and got an orange one. As soon as she saw it, she ran upstairs screaming, "GINGER! GINGER!" She refuses to come downstairs until I get rid of "the soulless creature." FML

#14644616
365 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34001) - you deserved it (7634)

On 01/19/2011 at 10:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I drove to buy new sneakers to work out and lose weight. Coming out of the store, I saw someone had parked too close to me. I had to beg a stranger to back my car out for me, because no matter how I tried, I couldn't get into the driver's seat. FML

#14634779
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23776) - you deserved it (9448)

On 01/19/2011 at 1:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was going to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. I had awful diarrhea and was almost done, when I noticed a spider on the ground. Being terrified, I took a giant ball of toilet paper to kill it. I realized then that I had no toilet paper left to use. FML

#14634381
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9819) - you deserved it (30848)

On 01/19/2011 at 12:45am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

#14512160
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68709) - you deserved it (3656)

On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

#14512160
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68709) - you deserved it (3656)

On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend told me to stuff my bra before going to a party with him and his friends because he didn't want to be embarrassed. FML

#14428491
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36870) - you deserved it (4616)

On 01/01/2011 at 7:51pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw a girl on the subway that I knew so I started waving frantically. She gave me a really weird expression and moved quickly away from me. Then I realised that I only knew her because I had stalked her Facebook once. FML

#14381626
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8086) - you deserved it (47871)

On 12/29/2010 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)



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