MainPrism

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Offline (the 06/14/2015 at 5:02am)

MainPrism

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 October 1987 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4893
  • Number of comments : 111
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MainPrism's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 3:52pm<b>sugoi72</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 5:13pm<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 6:33pm<b>silverflame1</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 6:48pm<b>rubez08</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 11:43pm<b>barreiroj</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 2:25pm<b>Fidge86</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 4:12pm<b>ellollama</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 7:20pm<b>xxBFMVAAMIWxx</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 7:14pm<b>foxxakush</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 5:06pm<b>bullhand93</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 2:08pm<b>schwaka</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 2:03pm<b>gladlily</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 1:33pm<b>chinaski7628</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 1:33pm<b>theinformer</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 1:27pm<b>TheAsma</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 12:14pm<b>potatomanjr</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 11:41am<b>bfsd42</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 11:23am

Fucked!<b>sugoi72</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 11:13pm

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MainPrism's favorite FMLs

Today, I invited my boyfriend to come to an event to meet some of my friends for the first time. I had been raving about him for weeks, and everyone was curious to meet this "amazing guy" I'd been dating. He showed up in a Darth Vader costume because he thought it would be funny to embarrass me. FML

by JJLight / 05/26/2013 at 11:14pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, a man asked about fishing in the river which flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:40pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Work

Today, and throughout the past week, my electricity, water, cable, and Internet were progressively shut off. Why? Because my deranged mother-in-law has been stealing the money orders I use to pay my bills out of my mailbox. She also stole the late notices because she didn't want me to be "mad". FML

by LightsOut / 05/21/2013 at 6:47pm / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, I have an upset stomach. Every other minute, it sounds like Chewbacca is screaming to get out. FML

by pixkalexi / 05/20/2013 at 4:14pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I was sitting next to an attractive man. Much to my surprise, he started stroking his foot against mine. I was happy at the flirting because I've been attracted to him forever, so I played along. That's when he stood up and explained he was trying to stretch out a cramp. FML

by Redfaced / 05/15/2013 at 12:54pm / United Kingdom (Walsall) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

by asdffhhjk / 05/15/2013 at 4:08am / Philippines (Manila) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was wearing a black shirt, black pants, and a black beanie at a grocery store. I came around a corner, bumped into a woman and she screamed, "Murderer." I was immediately thrown out. FML

by notarobber / 05/15/2013 at 3:20am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, in the doctor's waiting room, a little boy asked me for a cookie. I told him that I didn't have any. He replied, "But my mom says that ladies with big butts always have cookies in their handbags." FML

by grossesfesses / 05/15/2013 at 2:58am / France (Picardie) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up without my fiancé in bed next to me, but I assumed he'd gone to work early. I went on Facebook to find that he had posted a break-up post to himself from my account and set my status to single. I then found a note with "Sorry" written on it stuck to the kitchen counter. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2013 at 6:41pm / Love

Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML

by DrewK / 05/14/2013 at 4:09pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML

by toothache / 05/14/2013 at 8:03am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I was dancing in the passenger seat of my car with my family when a cop pulled us over. He thought I was trying to flag him down for help. I guess I'm not as good of a dancer as I thought. FML

by ktorih137 / 05/14/2013 at 7:32am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Transportation

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

by more than I wanted to know / 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm / Italy (Emilia-Romagna) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML

by What the fuck, son? / 05/11/2013 at 12:21pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Kids

Today, I let my dad put my dollar in the slot machine for me because I'm not old enough to gamble. I won $200 but he kept it because he "put the dollar in the slot machine." FML

by anonymous / 05/08/2013 at 8:07pm / United States (Wyoming) / Money