Laurgasming

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Laurgasming

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 15 September 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3465
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Laurgasming's page activity

Visits<b>5t3ff1k4h</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 9:52am<b>Red_140</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 10:25pm<b>Fireashes250</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 8:07pm<b>lectricpharaoh</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 4:29am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 6:42am<b>golden_warrior</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 7:38pm<b>gmc_blossom</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 5:24am<b>fml0505</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 2:03am<b>NoDontKillMe</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 6:14pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 10:09pm<b>Callilah</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 4:24pm<b>Pikawhore</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 11:08pm<b>BlitheNightmare</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 2:37am<b>SamKiwi</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 3:43am<b>GothickNihilist</b> - the 01/26/2013 at 2:01am<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 01/11/2013 at 9:00am<b>Pwobbles</b> - the 12/23/2012 at 6:06pm<b>kemnet</b> - the 11/25/2012 at 7:16pm

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Laurgasming's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to school with a bad haircut. I got about 50 cancer jokes so far. FML

by Finding Kemo / 04/16/2016 at 3:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sat at work for 8 hours daydreaming about the homemade 4 cheese ravioli I would come home to after spending 3 hours making it from scratch the night before. When I finally got home and heated the ravioli, I dropped it all over my feet, giving me second degree burns. FML

by HolyRavioli / 03/21/2016 at 1:37pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my psycho ex defaced my car. She didn't key it or slash my tires. She posted "TRUMP 2016" bumper stickers all over it. I don't know what glue they use, but it's been 2 hours and I haven't gotten any of them off. FML

by Baegel / 03/01/2016 at 8:52pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that not only am I pregnant, I'm too far along for an abortion. My husband and I originally bonded over the fact that we both hate children. FML

by wellthisisbad / 02/29/2016 at 7:27am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I was quizzing a girl at my college, and I noticed that when she answered a question, her ears wiggled. It was cute, so I pointed it out. She burst into tears, and the guy next to me said, "Way to make her feel insecure, douchebag." FML

Today, I failed on a school presentation because I was not prepared. Apparently, the fact that my computer crapped itself and started giving off smoke last period isn't a good reason for not having my presentation prepared. FML

by pissedandcomputerless / 11/07/2013 at 1:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for knowing more about Batman than he does. He's only seen some of the movies, and as a kid my dad owned a comic book store. He still doesn't see why I should know more, because I'm a girl, and "girls aren't supposed to know about super heroes." FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2013 at 5:48pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my online order arrived earlier than I expected. I opened it to find some kind of anal sex toy. Whoever this is for is going to be disappointed when they get my 3DS game. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2013 at 12:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up and saw that my alarm clock had fallen on the floor. It read 9:05 am. I panicked because I was late for work. As I frantically got ready, I went to pick my alarm clock up to place it back on my nightstand when I realized it was upside down. The actual time was 5:06. FML

by NoorFML / 09/13/2013 at 9:24am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my superior gave me a box of ethernet cables which were previously attached to mainframes storing classified data. He requested I cut them in half so that the residual data would leak out. Not only does this guy make twice my salary, there was no convincing him otherwise. We cut them up. FML

by SparkOfJade / 08/13/2013 at 12:07am / United States (Maryland) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my dog died. In the same kitchen corner that two of my other dogs have died. I have a "Corner Of Death" in my kitchen. FML

by The Corner Of Death / 08/12/2013 at 4:17am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

by zackeryburch / 08/03/2013 at 9:01am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching my 3-year-old sister play in the bathtub. She started screaming at her toys, saying "You're staying under the water until you DIE!" She then looked at me and cackled. I share a room with this demon child. FML

by ktiskool / 08/01/2013 at 12:03am / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

by turning red / 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Instead of moaning like any normal person, he just kept saying stuff like "uh-huh," "not too bad," and "yup" in a complete monotone. It was probably the most uncomfortable experience of my life. FML

by awkward / 07/26/2013 at 2:00pm / United States (California) / Intimacy