Kruiser

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Offline (the 01/07/2015 at 8:49am)

Kruiser

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1773
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Kruiser's page activity

Visits<b>ExtremeEncounter</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 12:11am<b>IAm123</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 8:37pm<b>amyfann</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 3:48am<b>cwenboo</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 8:45am<b>eminemineminem</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 12:50pm<b>teentee401</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 9:26am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 12:34pm<b>Cortezthe1st</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 4:24pm<b>ElmoSaysSquishy</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 6:09am<b>Domdom96</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 4:50am<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 8:04am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:27am<b>iG_08</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 4:06am<b>854alice</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 3:49am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 6:42pm<b>anonisfab</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 1:49am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 11:44pm<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 4:17pm

Kruiser's FML badges

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Kruiser's favorite FMLs

Today, I used my vaporiser to make my house smell like lavender while I went to work. My brother thought it would be funny to pee inside it. My whole house now smells like pissy lavender. FML

by lavenderpiss / 12/15/2013 at 9:04pm / Australia (South Australia) / Kids

Today, my boss found out that my girlfriend dumped me. He asked if that meant she would no longer bring her delicious homemade cookies to the office. When I said yes, he fired me on the spot. FML

by justin / 12/12/2013 at 10:08pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML

by UnfortunatelyAmusing / 11/04/2013 at 7:25pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I got stuck in the bathroom with no toilet paper. I had to reach into my small trash can and use soiled toilet paper to clean myself. When I went to flush the toilet, I noticed three unused rolls of toilet paper sitting on the counter. FML

by calobrisi / 10/15/2013 at 3:34pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later put on Facebook that, "Today was a great day!" FML

by WTF / 09/12/2013 at 7:08pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I noticed that my car's passenger-side door has cobwebs all over it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2013 at 10:16am / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, a customer screamed at me, because her iced coffee tasted exactly like coffee, and she hates coffee. Sadly, this isn't even the most insane person I've had to deal with at this job. FML

by Neanderthals walk among us / 08/04/2013 at 3:09pm / Hungary (Budapest) / Work

Today, I got the sex talk from my dad. It wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't said "It's not the size of the stick, it's how you use it." I'm a girl. FML

by confused_girl / 08/01/2013 at 1:10am / United States (Iowa) / Intimacy

Today, I was watching my 3-year-old sister play in the bathtub. She started screaming at her toys, saying "You're staying under the water until you DIE!" She then looked at me and cackled. I share a room with this demon child. FML

by ktiskool / 08/01/2013 at 12:03am / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, whilst driving past a cyclist, I thought it would be funny to make him jump by blasting my horn right behind him and then driving off. I guess he thought it would be funny to catch up with me, yank off my wing-mirror, and hurl it through the open window at my face. FML

Today, I visited my grandparents at their farm. When I went to pee in the outhouse, I noticed a round thing in the middle of the hole, so I peed on it. It was a beehive. FML

by random / 05/13/2013 at 11:06am / United States / Animals

Today, I answered a call at work from a very irate gentleman. After being shouted and sworn at profusely, I ended the call in a slightly less than civil manner. Turns out that guy is one of our company's biggest clients. FML

by hatemyjob / 04/23/2013 at 2:25pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Work

Today, while practicing a song in choir, I got a boner. Trying to cover it up, I tried sitting down. My choir teacher got mad and made me stand in front of the whole class. FML

by Soundofaboner / 04/23/2013 at 12:08pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was small talking with an elderly man, who told me that nobody cares about him. Even though I had only known him for an hour, to try and make him feel a little better I told him I care about him. He then called me a creep, stomped his cane onto my foot, and walked off. FML

by 'creep' / 04/22/2013 at 1:01am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my only day off work in a while. I told my boss I'd be available via phone in case of emergencies. So far I've been called three times: To ask how the fax works, to let me know it's a slow day, and to ask me where the letter R is on a keyboard. FML

by Anonymous / 04/19/2013 at 6:17am / Germany (Berlin) / Work