About Kingbreezy04 : 1 Corinthians 16:13- Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. I love basketball, LeBron James is my favorite player of all time, so is Magic Johnson. I also love the new guys like Kyrie Irving, Rajon Rondo,Kevin Love, and Brandon Jennings. I also love some of the older players like Jerry West, Oscar Robertson, and Pete Maravich. One more thing if you don't like Batman, fuck you.
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Kingbreezy04's favorite FMLs
Today, I found my beloved hamster dead in her cage. Later that day, my boyfriend told me he already noticed that she was dead last night, but did not feel like telling me because he was afraid I wouldn't feel like doing it anymore that night. FML
by cinderella / 09/27/2010 at 10:47am / Netherlands (Groningen) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex for the first time when my 4 year old sister walked in. She thought we were making a dog pile, so just as soon as my boyfriend was about to finish, she jumped on his back. FML
by Ashley / 09/07/2010 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was riding the subway when a beautiful topless girl walked into my car and sat directly in front of me. Then, the train stopped abruptly and I banged my head. The girl was gone and I realized it had all been a dream. Then I realized I was supposed to get off 17 stops ago. FML
by Peekaman / 08/15/2010 at 6:31pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/17/2010 at 8:44am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by Hayley / 01/10/2010 at 10:37pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. I started tearing up and telling him that I feel like he never has time for me anymore. He responded with, "I'm hungry." FML
by hanzastfu / 10/26/2009 at 1:25pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, my 9 year old little sister is coming back in town with the rest of my family. She specifically asked me to feed her fish. I totally forgot until she called me 10 minutes ago to tell me she was on her way home and couldn't wait to see her fishie. He's dead. FML
by deadfish / 10/03/2009 at 12:28pm / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, I asked a woman where her beautiful accent was from. The woman stared at me for a while. Then her daughter told me that the reason her mother talked like that was because she had a stroke a few months ago. FML
by anonymus / 08/18/2009 at 12:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in line at a checkout. I have quite a few facial piercings and 1/2" gauges in my ears. The very heavy cashier asks how big my gauges are and then starts telling me about how she recently got her clitoris pierced and how sometimes she has orgasms behind the register. FML
by toomuchmetal / 06/24/2009 at 3:17pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, I was driving on the motorway when a cop car made me stop. It was a routine check and when they said "Have you been drinking?" of course I said no. To that, my 6 year old sitting in the back screamed "Yes she did! She's lying I saw her drink!" I had drunk a milkshake. FML
by Kimmiko / 06/04/2009 at 8:17am / Germany (Niedersachsen) / Transportation
Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML
by Anonymous / 04/18/2009 at 6:42am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at the beach walking on the boardwalk without a shirt on. Two cute girls are walking my way and I decide to try and impress them by flexing my abs. While I flexed them, I accidentally let a fart out that everyone heard. Everybody, including the girls, laughed hysterically at me. FML
by gotmon3y / 04/07/2009 at 12:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Love
Today, I walked past a church with a bunch of people standing outside waiting for the bride and groom to walk out. When the church doors opened, I yelled congratulations as loud as I could. It was a funeral. FML
by oops / 04/05/2009 at 1:20am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Jenny / 03/30/2009 at 8:06pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML
by JAY22 / 03/26/2009 at 7:41am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…
- Today, a young woman on the subway asked me to hold her pocket mirror open in front of her. I asked… Today, a lady came for a death certificate at the city hall reception where I work. Reflexively, I… Today, at 11:30 p.m., after a 5-hour train journey to get back to Paris carrying a suitcase that’s…