Killer_fel

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Killer_fel

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 September 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5156
  • Number of comments : 80
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About Killer_fel : I'm somewhat weird. I live in Quebec, Canada. I use the app, so message me if you dare! I fluently speak Français.

Killer_fel's page activity

Visits<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 5:55pm<b>whoopydoodah</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 6:19pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 5:31pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 5:51pm<b>TTesla</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 5:40pm<b>ajean97</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 7:26pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:40pm<b>NorskItaliano</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 2:51pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 9:13pm<b>adelinchen3</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:31am<b>zyperman43</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 6:20pm<b>barnee26</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 2:59pm<b>Slaet95</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 8:39am<b>runnamuk</b> - the 04/10/2012 at 8:29am

Killer_fel's FML badges

50 quality responses

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Perfectionist

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Killer_fel's favorite FMLs

Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML

by oops / 07/15/2012 at 1:34am / United States / Intimacy

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2012 at 2:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

by kalikanna / 07/07/2012 at 2:10am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

by Dammit / 07/07/2012 at 12:45am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a diet coke?" FML

by Anonymous / 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a home at a bargain. It will need 5 grand in repairs to fix plumbing and electric, but it's mine. When I pulled up the listing to show pictures to my friends, there was a new listing that was in the same neighborhood, and a larger, nicer house that is move in ready. Same price. FML

by jenjam / 07/04/2012 at 8:50pm / Money

Today, my new boss gave everyone a lecture about sexual harassment in the workplace. Which would be fine if he'd been able to tear his gaze off my chest for more than a minute at a time. FML

by hypocrite / 07/03/2012 at 12:43pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, my mom called to chew me out for having my sister arrested. My sister broke into my apartment, rearranged my living room, and claimed she now lived with me. She then threatened me with a butcher's knife for not appreciating what she had done. My mom wants me to pay the bail. FML

by needmorelocks / 07/03/2012 at 1:36am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend got a tattoo of a Rainbow Dash over her pubic mound. Now whenever I go down on her, I'll be eye-to-eye with an adorable pony that shits rainbows. FML

by nobrony / 07/02/2012 at 3:53pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

by BloodFaerie / 06/30/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was fired for using violence and intimidation in the work place. I was a bouncer at a strip club. FML

by John / 06/30/2012 at 1:08am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I saw my girlfriend walking hand-in-hand down the street with another man. When I confronted her, she claimed she had no idea who I was, and the guy told me to beat it. Later on, she returned to our apartment and actually tried to act as if nothing had happened. FML

by Anonymous / 06/29/2012 at 9:06pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

by Nick / 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend doesn't have time to text me back, but he does have time to post an entire Facebook album dedicated to cats. FML

by JJBones / 06/29/2012 at 6:03am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the only way I can convince my husband to start working out is by convincing him that we are training for when the "zombie outbreak" happens. FML

by zombieguyswife / 06/28/2012 at 7:44pm / United States (Missouri) / Health