About KatieHoof345 : Hey, I'm Katie(: The shit you hear about me may be true, but it could be as fake as the bitch who told you
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YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47449) - you deserved it (4251) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I helped myself to a small glass of cocktail from the fridge, not realising it was alcoholic. I told my mom what happened. She made me drink salt and water until I vomited so I wouldn't get "alcohol poisoning". I'm 19. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23856) - you deserved it (5581)
On 12/03/2011 at 5:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36947) - you deserved it (2822)
On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)
Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32462) - you deserved it (7238)
On 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by pops up - United States (Missouri)
Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45096) - you deserved it (2146)
On 12/01/2011 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by sometingwong (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, after recently moving to America as I've always dreamt of, I saw my first, majestic deer. My boyfriend slammed it with the rental car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21292) - you deserved it (2431)
On 12/01/2011 at 12:41am - misc - by AmericanDream (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24479) - you deserved it (2852)
On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my fiancé insists that instead of kissing at the crucial moment of our wedding ceremony, we should give each other a high five. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32941) - you deserved it (4315)
On 11/30/2011 at 6:17am - love - by no low five (woman) - United States
Today, my husband asked me, "Why do you love me?" I spent the next five minutes spilling my heart and soul out to him. After I'd asked the same question, he looked me straight in the eye and said, "I don't." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42489) - you deserved it (2834)
On 11/28/2011 at 7:51am - love - by nirvana_mama157 - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22756) - you deserved it (6679)
Today, my mom went through my textbook and sharpied everything that could be "pornographic." It's a high-school biology textbook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23069) - you deserved it (1372)
On 11/27/2011 at 8:07pm - misc - by wow - United States (Texas)
Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31492) - you deserved it (2260)
On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, my brother decided deodorant causes cancer. He goes to the gym every day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20878) - you deserved it (1764)
On 11/27/2011 at 5:19am - health - by smellyhouse (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I ran into my boyfriend's ex. I decided to be a good person and hold the door for her as we walked into the store. She decided to be the bitch she is and stomp on my foot as she walked through the open doorway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24312) - you deserved it (4673)
On 11/27/2011 at 3:58am - love - by good citizen - United States
Today, I was at the mall and started singing along to the playing of "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas." A kid glanced at me and said to her mom, "She IS a hippopotamus." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24830) - you deserved it (7203)
On 11/26/2011 at 6:13pm - misc - by Person15 - United States (Indiana)
Monday 20 May 2013
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