Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

KK3137

Offline (15 hours ago) | Search for a member

KK3137

46Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 7277
  • Number of comments : 329
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 7 posted

About KK3137 : Im just a girl who lives in the world...

I like to comment sometimes, but I usually just stick to reading other people's comments. My favourite commentors are DocBastard (I also read his blog, I highly recommend it), Pleonasm, Perdix and Noor.

I speak fluent Swedish, Czech, English and French, and I speak both German and Spanish at a conversational level, though my grammar could still be greatly improved.

I'm a very social person and enjoy meeting new people, so feel free to message me if you like ;) (oh, and the pic is a beer mug that I bought for my brother's birthday. He loved it, to say the least.)

KK3137's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - 24 hours ago<b>bjake93mec</b> - yesterday at 11:38am<b>Saxicolous</b> - yesterday at 3:01pm<b>Pokefinch27</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 9:33am<b>cheshirecat13242</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 2:24pm<b>DragonDude</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 12:39pm<b>DaEpicTaco</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 2:35am<b>fatjoeman</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 6:26pm<b>jaschwabz</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 7:01am<b>powerkicker</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:21pm<b>kingneirad</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 2:09pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 12:13am<b>blackneko</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 10:26am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 9:41pm<b>FmlYdi4ever</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 7:36pm<b>Xx_dankdoge_xX</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:19am<b>pete9913</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 7:27pm<b>caaguilar</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 8:07pm

Fucked!<b>One_Way</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 6:13am<b>caaguilar</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 2:07am<b>lukian</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 10:04am<b>ddeveshh</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 9:39am<b>hippodankamus</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 9:35am<b>blackneko</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 6:33am<b>mr_dour</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 6:55am<b>daken96</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 12:17am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 4:33am<b>jaschwabz</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 11:50pm<b>ManUtdforlife</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 3:43pm<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 7:33am<b>andres__13</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 5:57am<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 5:59pm<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 2:21am<b>muarif</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:07pm<b>aliah_heard</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 12:44am<b>Roxy4102</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 8:00am

KK3137's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of KK3137's badges

KK3137's favorite FMLs

Today, while training a new employee, I had to run after a naked guy chasing a hooker at the hotel I work at. I made him go back to his room, while she offered me a good time for 300 bucks. The trainee left and hasn't come back yet. FML

#20849812
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39247) - you deserved it (2798)

On 08/22/2013 at 7:50pm - work - by Awkward - United States

Today, I found out that apparently I'm in Miami. I am also enjoying a five-star hotel and all of its services. Only one problem: I'm still here, stuck in a small suburban town. F*ck identity theft. FML

#20844068
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49651) - you deserved it (2871)

On 08/19/2013 at 12:30am - misc - by iwannagotomiamitoo - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
190 comments

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML

#20836995
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66493) - you deserved it (8446)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to my boss's dinner party. My sister, who also works with me, sat across from me at the table. I felt her kick me so I kicked her back. Then I heard something start crying. It was the boss's baby crawling under the table. FML

#20823157
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54338) - you deserved it (18261)

On 08/06/2013 at 1:07am - work - by offuckingcourse - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I arrived in Barbados on vacation. We visited a club, and they had a selection of drinks with weird names. My husband ordered one called the Raging Bitch, flicked his finger towards me, and said to the barkeeper, "Might as well get something I'm used to." FML

#20820272
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45165) - you deserved it (10399)

On 08/04/2013 at 12:45pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML

#20817265
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57066) - you deserved it (5540)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by um... what the fuck, miss? (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

#20805312
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58927) - you deserved it (9693)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

#20793994
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57480) - you deserved it (6639)

On 07/20/2013 at 11:45am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was at the park playing Frisbee with my friends, when I saw a boy sitting on a bench looking rather sad. "Hey!" I yelled, and he looked up at me. I lightly threw the Frisbee in his direction, and it hit him in the face. He was blind. FML

#20788974
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54911) - you deserved it (17103)

On 07/17/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by WasntMe - United States

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

#20786268
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44468) - you deserved it (32533) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/16/2013 at 9:18am - health - by Aliiiice (woman) - France (Haute-Normandie)

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55221) - you deserved it (9460)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was working as a nurse, and an elderly man had just passed away. As the patient's wife was leaving she said, "Thank you for taking such good care of my husband." Then I, intending to say "Sorry for your loss," said "Thank you for your loss." FML

#20758244
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49643) - you deserved it (8981)

On 07/01/2013 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

#20750993
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43345) - you deserved it (3111)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by keiran123 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be funny to go to the Apple store and log me on to Facebook on every single computer. FML

#20695876
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46092) - you deserved it (8651)

On 05/30/2013 at 7:06pm - love - by Terminator101101 - United States (Nevada)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: