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Jimster1712

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Jimster1712
  • Town/Country : Beijing, China
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 December 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 2999
  • Number of comments : 235
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About Jimster1712 : Hi I'm Jimmy, 14 years old, an asian guy whoI really loves drumming and metal. Favorite metal bands : Lamb Of God, Trivium , Dream Theater, Divine Heresy etc , I also really like Memes, can tell from my Me Gusta pic. Don't take my comments seriously, most are jokes.

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Jimster1712's favorite FMLs

Today, my five year old son decided to move all my stuffed animals I have around the house, into sex positions and massive orgies. What have I been teaching my son lately? FML

#15229654
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11181) - you deserved it (37511)

On 03/07/2011 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by lolzboss - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

#14974014
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28297) - you deserved it (10639)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:51pm - kids - by Mikabe (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

#14838014
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65525) - you deserved it (6031)

On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

#14610612
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41434) - you deserved it (2809) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I fell and got a nasty cut above my right eye. The doctor in the ER sealed the wound with surgical glue. He also glued his glove to my eyebrow, and let glue run onto my eyelid. Not only do I have a scar and medical bill, I now have no eyebrow or eyelashes on my right eye. FML

#14488481
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24729) - you deserved it (1570)

On 01/06/2011 at 7:26pm - health - by Dante -

Today, my boyfriend decided to re-enact a scene from Family Guy. He locked me in the car with him and farted deadly ones repeatedly. He wouldn't let me out until I learned to "love the gas." FML

#14463495
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32426) - you deserved it (7172)

On 01/04/2011 at 3:09pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved

Today, a woman came to my counter and ordered 12 donuts. I said, "OK sure, a dozen donuts." She paused, looked at me with disgust and yelled, "I said 12, NOT a dozen." FML

#14277072
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41437) - you deserved it (3370)

On 12/20/2010 at 8:52pm - work - by morenita27 (woman) - Canada

Today, a woman came to my counter and ordered 12 donuts. I said, "OK sure, a dozen donuts." She paused, looked at me with disgust and yelled, "I said 12, NOT a dozen." FML

#14277072
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41437) - you deserved it (3370)

On 12/20/2010 at 8:52pm - work - by morenita27 (woman) - Canada

Today, I hit my boss's car. It's only my second day on the job. FML

#14230878
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18926) - you deserved it (8583)

On 12/17/2010 at 12:14am - work - by iswearicandrive (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I learned that I wasn't really allergic to chocolate. My parents made it up when I was a child because they didn't want me to get fat. FML

#13970714
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31385) - you deserved it (3018)

On 11/25/2010 at 2:32am - misc - by wow (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, a telemarketer found me so weird that he hung up on me. FML

#13861798
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19386) - you deserved it (7430)

On 11/16/2010 at 3:07am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was taking medicine for my sinus problems and trying to write an essay. I got most of the way done, then unexpectedly fell asleep on my keyboard. When I woke up, my face was wet. I drowned my laptop in my drool. FML

#13777166
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16012) - you deserved it (4464)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:17pm - work - by drooooooool (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

#13773002
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45150) - you deserved it (8491)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend got mugged. I found out because the mugger had the courtesy to ring me, after I texted several times asking where he was, to say "He won't reply. He got robbed." FML

#13634930
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24304) - you deserved it (2067)

On 10/29/2010 at 2:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

#13572879
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12127) - you deserved it (40300)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)



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