About JenDanielle917 : I never thumb down comments.(:
Things I love:
- milky ways
- love
- friends
- FML
- when people thumb up my comments
- my iPod
- my dogs
Things I hate:
- society
- bitches
- when people thumb down everyone's comments
- when people thumb up their own comments
Don't message, I only use the iPod app.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I was watching TV when the Jim Beam commercial came on with the hot girl saying how she likes her men fat and hairy. My mom walked in and said, "See honey, you still have a chance." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30738) - you deserved it (3467)
On 02/16/2009 at 4:45pm - misc - by LonelyInLA (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was hooking up with a girl in my apartment when I told her I didn't have a condom. She started laughing and upon realizing my look of confusion, said "Oh, you actually thought I was going to have sex with you?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (47484) - you deserved it (13293)
On 02/16/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by pineapple456 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I lost 200 dollars while playing poker with my new sunglasses. Turns out you can see the cards in the reflection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9832) - you deserved it (65276)
On 02/16/2009 at 10:25am - misc - by jwz (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, I took a friend out for what I thought was date. After dinner was over and I paid, she pulled the bill out and wrote her name phone number on it for the waiter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41349) - you deserved it (2644)
On 02/16/2009 at 1:41am - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, on campus, these really overly-happy people walking around with big signs saying "free hugs". When I walked towards them, their smiles faded, and they put their signs down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39562) - you deserved it (3323)
On 02/13/2009 at 4:51pm - misc - by shit's weak - United States (Indiana)
Today, I told my mom I was going through a growth spurt. She said "Yeah, horizontally." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24025) - you deserved it (5541)
On 02/13/2009 at 2:18pm - misc - by shorty (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (416353) - you deserved it (26644)
On 02/13/2009 at 10:54am - intimacy - by The Sbeak (man) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I found a bone in my sandwich. It was a veggie burger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34521) - you deserved it (5572)
On 02/13/2009 at 9:45am - misc - by veggiegal (woman) - United States (Vermont)
Today, I was complaining to my sister about how jealous I was of her looks. Her response was "Sometimes it's okay to be the ugly sister. Like, you have less of a chance of getting raped." FML
I agree, your life sucks (44693) - you deserved it (4500)
On 02/12/2009 at 8:24pm - misc - by Duckie W (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I took my friend to buy a pregancy test. She took it and it came out negative. I decided to re-pee on it to be funny...it turned to positive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45474) - you deserved it (16994)
On 02/12/2009 at 11:34am - misc - by whybia (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I found my daughter on Facebook after years of looking for her after the divorce. It turns out it was my ex pretending to be my daughter so she could track me down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39820) - you deserved it (4759)
On 02/11/2009 at 9:06pm - misc - by toad (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my boyfriend told me he was going to take me out somewhere special, so I called in sick for work. Turns out he had made reservations for the restaurant I worked at. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26826) - you deserved it (6330)
On 02/11/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by seriously?! (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was in the car with a group of my girl friends discussing sexual experiences when I looked down and realized my Blackberry had dialed the family I babysit for and had left a five minute voicemail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37950) - you deserved it (12295)
On 02/10/2009 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by Embarrassed (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8833) - you deserved it (61117)
On 02/10/2009 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by JLoistheBomb (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my tennis coach showed up to practice in an all white outfit. I exclaimed, "You're looking very white today!" He's African American. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7083) - you deserved it (33819)
On 02/10/2009 at 12:59am - misc - by Tennisplayer (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Monday 17 June 2013
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