About ImAFaker : Horror movies, video games, soccer, and football. Chat me up if you want. P.S. This is a comedy website, I don't care if you're feelings are hurt as long as it's funny. I may sound like an asshole but this is called comedy for a reason. I will check out your profile but sorry people, I have no fucks to give.
ImAFaker's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
ImAFaker's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 08/21/2016 at 5:21am / Ukraine (Kyyiv) / Miscellaneous
Today, all of my friends bailed from the birthday party I was throwing myself. This was also after they had encouraged me for months to have one, knowing I'd never had my birthday celebrated before. FML
by Its My BDay I Can Cry If I Want To / 08/10/2016 at 12:51pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I thought I'd spice things up by kissing my husband on the lips and then working my way down. But about halfway, I got some of his chest hairs lodged in my throat and started gagging. To avoid ruining the mood, I kept going, silently gagging, until we finished. I swallowed the hair. FML
by so unsexy / 08/04/2016 at 5:32pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, my mom grabbed my phone, said she was taking it because I'd been disrespectful, and hung up my call. I'd been speaking with a work client. This is the gratitude I get for paying all her bills for the past 2 years, all because she's too lazy to get a job. FML
by Anonymous / 07/27/2016 at 11:24am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Lady Bloodshart of the Redwater / 07/15/2016 at 4:27pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by You're Not a Wizard / 06/30/2016 at 8:29am / Work
by r1has / 06/29/2016 at 4:01pm / Pakistan (Punjab) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my girlfriend to her ex boyfriend's apartment for her to exchange his spare car keys for some of her grandmothers items. I waited outside in the parking lot for an hour, with no idea which door was his. She came out no longer a virgin. FML
by Joey / 06/04/2016 at 2:52pm / United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East) / Love
by humanshield / 04/10/2016 at 12:49pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/02/2016 at 12:06am / United States (Florida) / Work
by cutiecuppiecakez / 02/29/2016 at 4:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I completed driving school. After 30 hours of classwork, 6 hours of driving lessons, and a very tough driving test, I passed and can now get a 15% safe driver insurance discount. My friend just told me he only had to watch a 15 minute video to get the same discount. FML
by Whatthehell / 02/20/2016 at 8:35pm / United States (Tennessee) / Money
Today, the play I was directing opened. The curtain opened, and my lead actor and actress weren't prepared. I could tell from the looks on their faces as the whole audience saw him balls deep in her, doggy style, on stage. FML
by headinabag33 / 02/14/2016 at 8:57pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, after finding out that my professor likes to talk trash about, and constantly belittle, Muslims in every American History class he teaches, I submitted an essay about Muslim contributions to humanity. He held me back after class and asked why I gave him such filth. I'm a Muslim. FML
by Upset / 02/03/2016 at 1:14pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, at my job drug testing high schoolers, I see that one of the kids selected for the testing looked incredibly high. So, after he goes in the bathroom and gives me his cup with his urine inside, I take a closer look and see that the little shit jizzed in the cup. I hate my job. FML
by zachhewett / 02/02/2016 at 5:53pm / United States (Alabama) / Work
- 1Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana…