Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Harpy20

Offline (the 10/12/2014 at 10:05am) | Search for a member

Harpy20

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 25364
  • Number of comments : 608
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About Harpy20 : Sith FTW.

For the Horde!

Harpy20's page activity

Visits<b>differentadi</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 11:09pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 12:03am<b>teentee401</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 6:22am<b>ODST_Panda</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 5:38pm<b>Zarniclopsindorf</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 5:56pm<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 10:39am<b>FaultInMyStars</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 11:58pm<b>KittehFreak</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 5:48pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 11:14pm<b>aayukat</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 5:54am<b>Donnellando</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 5:29am<b>nataliewby</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 11:50am<b>danthehuman</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 6:11pm<b>brwolfie</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 12:16pm<b>ArtemisGide</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 11:21pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 11:27pm<b>mrhammer101</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:42pm<b>jncldprs</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 4:02pm

Liked!<b>differentadi</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 5:09am

Harpy20's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Harpy20's badges

Harpy20's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

#21151127
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47446) - you deserved it (7218)

On 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm - misc - by great 1st impression (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my girlfriend and I got into an argument while she was in the bathroom. I told her I was leaving her because she's too needy. She came out of the bathroom and threw her used tampon at me. FML

#21151109
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45999) - you deserved it (32734)

On 05/25/2014 at 11:50am - love - by HomicidalPegasus (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I accidentally ripped out my boyfriend's insulin pump while trying to give him a lapdance. FML

#21148769
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48222) - you deserved it (15161)

On 05/22/2014 at 10:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I found out that just because my roommate doesn't buy alcohol, it doesn't mean she isn't stealing mine and slowly replacing it with water. That bottle cost me $150 and was destined to be a present for my best friend, whom I haven't seen in years. FML

#21147516
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41825) - you deserved it (4012)

On 05/21/2014 at 5:23pm - misc - by NoMoreMeatForAYear (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I had to take my daughter home from school because she had been caught flashing the boys during class. I tried to explain to her that it wasn't an appropriate way to act or behave but she interrupted me, "Mom, you don't even understand." You're right. I don't. FML

#21146764
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44831) - you deserved it (6290)

On 05/20/2014 at 10:24pm - kids - by HouseWife - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out that the built in lighter in my car does NOT in fact glow red when hot. I now have circles burned into my finger. FML

#21146659
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31322) - you deserved it (26710)

On 05/20/2014 at 8:53pm - misc - by My__life___ (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to kick my own father out of my house after he started attacking my wife for breastfeeding our newborn son in the living room. All the way to the door, he ranted that "You don't see me whipping my dick out and pissing in front of everyone, do you?" FML

#21146270
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54097) - you deserved it (4798)

On 05/20/2014 at 1:27pm - misc - by Q - United States

Today, my grandmother told me that since my dad was a mistake, I too am a mistake. FML

#21143150
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45701) - you deserved it (3757)

On 05/17/2014 at 5:56pm - misc - by 2ndgenoration (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was on my way to my first job interview in months. I wasn't even halfway to the place when a bunch of cockbites in a car drove past and hurled a bucket of paint out the window, drenching me and several other people on the street. FML

#21143094
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46448) - you deserved it (3549)

On 05/17/2014 at 4:51pm - misc - by spasti-cunt (woman) - Ireland

Today, my 15-year-old son told me that he and his new girlfriend are deeply in love and are meant for each other. The "girlfriend" in question? My fiancé's 12-year old daughter. FML

#21143037
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47187) - you deserved it (5242)

On 05/17/2014 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my mom showing her friends that she can deepthroat a banana. That's something I could've lived a long and happy life without seeing. FML

#21141912
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52082) - you deserved it (5038)

On 05/16/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by fuck florida (man) - United States (California)

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, I finally brought a girl home from college. While I was making her some coffee, my roommate came down in her underwear, pretended to be my girlfriend, and asked if we were having a threesome. My date left before I could explain, and my roommate thinks it's fucking hilarious. FML

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

#21140332
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66904) - you deserved it (4945)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: