Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Harpy20

Offline (the 09/20/2014 at 8:14pm) | Search for a member

Harpy20

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 23448
  • Number of comments : 608
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About Harpy20 : Sith FTW.

For the Horde!

Harpy20's page activity

Visits<b>FaultInMyStars</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 11:58pm<b>KittehFreak</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 5:48pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 11:14pm<b>aayukat</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 5:54am<b>Donnellando</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 5:29am<b>nataliewby</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 11:50am<b>danthehuman</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 6:11pm<b>brwolfie</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 12:16pm<b>ArtemisGide</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 11:21pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 11:27pm<b>mrhammer101</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:42pm<b>jncldprs</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 4:02pm<b>Raxal</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 6:11am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 1:08pm<b>palosqueak</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 7:30am<b>g9m9brown</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 1:44pm<b>Fancyman123</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 1:00pm<b>hetalia_thailand</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 12:15pm

Harpy20's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Harpy20's badges

Harpy20's favorite FMLs

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

#21140332
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66851) - you deserved it (4944)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States

Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML

#21135849
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22651) - you deserved it (53247)

On 05/10/2014 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by vivelawank - United Kingdom

Today, I was bored at work, so I started browsing the Internet. While I was on my Facebook page, my boss tagged me in a status: "I've been standing behind you for ten minutes." FML

#21134321
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22210) - you deserved it (46121)

On 05/08/2014 at 7:46pm - work - by notbrowsingnow (man) - United States

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63637) - you deserved it (8091)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37731) - you deserved it (20044)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband and I put our children to bed a little earlier than usual, so we could have some sexy time. Immediately following my full-blown orgasm, I rolled over, only to see my wide-eyed son peeking over the top of the mattress. FML

#21133668
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59810) - you deserved it (13569)

On 05/07/2014 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I retrieved the wrong luggage from an airport carousel. I'm now the owner of two water-bras, a false beard, a bag of cat litter, and some anal beads. I am afraid to get in touch with the original owner. FML

#21133607
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37826) - you deserved it (5585)

On 05/07/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by BaggedDown (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my neighbor scolded me for "allowing" her son to be bitten by one of my dogs. This would be reasonable, except for the fact that her kid had jumped my fence and tried to steal a rattle out of my daughter's hands. FML

#21133303
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42412) - you deserved it (2766)

On 05/07/2014 at 3:16pm - kids - by Arthur - United States

Today, I had just sat down in the lobby of my doctor's office when my phone alerted me that I had a friend request. I checked; it was from some girl from high school. I muttered to myself, "I don't want to be your friend." I then heard a gasp. She was sitting across from me. FML

Today, I am on vacation in Dubai with my dad and a few of his friends. I thought we were going to travel and see some amazing things, but I'm confined to my hotel room while everyone drinks and watches Family Guy. FML

#21123610
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40345) - you deserved it (4291)

On 04/26/2014 at 4:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, I realised that when I asked my girlfriend 4 months ago if was she on the pill, she thought I meant hay fever tablets. I'm going to be a father. FML

#21123315
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54297) - you deserved it (25340)

On 04/26/2014 at 8:28am - intimacy - by Sniffles (man) - Ireland

Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend of 3 years believes sex before marriage or even me just jacking off is a big no, doing online strip-shows for money is a big yes for her. Both times that I've proposed, she claimed she isn't "ready" for marriage. FML

#21118108
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43778) - you deserved it (8611)

On 04/20/2014 at 1:58pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51056) - you deserved it (4482)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I work at a food joint as a chef, and a customer found a long strand of hair in her food. The manager blamed me, even though I'm bald. FML

#21117573
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43814) - you deserved it (3187)

On 04/19/2014 at 10:39pm - work - by notmine (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex and in the heat of the moment I cried out for him to go harder. He had an exasperated expression on his face, and in an adamantly offended tone he said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he stopped and left the room. FML

#21115855
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56087) - you deserved it (7824)

On 04/17/2014 at 10:27pm - intimacy - by belljars (woman) - United States (California)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: