About Harpy20 : Sith FTW.
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About Harpy20 : Sith FTW.
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Harpy20's favorite FMLs
by clueless / 10/29/2009 at 12:09am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I went running for the first time in a few months. I had what I thought was an asthma attack. When I got home, I realized that it was not asthma, but instead I have gained so much weight that my running bra restricted my breathing. FML
by Anonymous / 10/29/2009 at 12:07am / United States (Georgia) / Health
by mintyfresh / 10/28/2009 at 10:54pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, I decided I'd take a nap in my car because I got to work very early. As I was waking up from my nap, I saw a cop looking right at me. Turns out, a lady who'd parked her car right next to mine after I was asleep had called the cops on me because she thought I was dead. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2009 at 9:09pm / United States (Maryland) / Transportation
Today, at work we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
by R / 10/28/2009 at 6:29pm / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Work
Today, it was my wedding day. I gave a speech about the first time my wife and I met. I said I knew she was the perfect woman for me and it was love at first sight. I looked to my right as she stormed off and then realized I had told a story about my ex-girlfriend who was sitting in the crowd. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2009 at 5:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I was playing with my cat and holding her upside down. She started frantically meowing, but I still continued on playing with her. Seconds later, she got explosive diarrhea everywhere, including my hair, face, shirt, and mouth. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2009 at 2:40pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals
by Slayeddd / 10/28/2009 at 9:06am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in my car studying on the campus parking lot. It was cold outside so I had the windows up. I had a severe upset stomach and was privately drowning in my own flatulence. Moments later, my crush knocks on the window to ask me something. I had to roll the windows down. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, someone left a used condom under the windshield wiper of my car. I didn't notice it until I was driving. And it was raining. It was even tied, so the contents couldn't leak out. I'm not planning artificial insemination anytime soon, but thanks for the thought. Man, I love college. FML
by bubblensuds1 / 10/28/2009 at 12:22am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was moving into my new house. While trying to turn on the light in the bedroom, I realized I couldn't reach the string on the fan. I got a chair, climbed up, reached over, and fell badly. While writhing in agony on the floor, I looked over to see a light switch on the wall. FML
by Kailey / 10/27/2009 at 8:37pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by dumped / 10/27/2009 at 7:13pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I took a trip to Wal-Mart. There's a car wash that they conveniently built right outside of this Wal-Mart. So as I was leaving, I decided to make use of this car wash, not even thinking about the $200 worth of groceries I had just purchased. I drive a pick-up truck. FML
by dave / 10/27/2009 at 11:36am / United States / Transportation
Today, I received the newspaper from my hometown. My ex-husband's wedding announcement and picture were on the front page. His new wife has the same first name as me. All my Facebook friends from high school commented on how much weight I've lost and how good I look in my wedding photo. FML
by WasFeelingGood / 10/27/2009 at 9:32am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend of five years gave me the silent treatment, refusing to talk to me or do anything more than glare at me during the entire three hour drive we took this morning. Why? Because I slept with his best friend. In his dream last night. FML
by anonymous / 10/27/2009 at 9:27am / United States (Wisconsin) / Love