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GlobalElephant

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GlobalElephant
  • Town/Country : Montreal, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2496
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About GlobalElephant : I really like bananas

GlobalElephant's last visitors

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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GlobalElephant's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my Mum and Dad having sex and didn't even realize what they were doing until she shouted at him to go harder. FML

#4715
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36405) - you deserved it (4117)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Bear - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML

#4708
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33477) - you deserved it (7239)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:29pm - misc - by frankrizzo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my fiancée "thought I should know" that she has a $125,000 student loan debt. FML

#4321
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30762) - you deserved it (3828)

On 01/31/2009 at 7:15pm - money - by Noname - United States (California)

Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left. FML

#4243
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24926) - you deserved it (1912)

On 01/31/2009 at 4:40pm - misc - by toosmall - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I realized I bought 30 condoms last year. I now have 29. FML

#4119
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20500) - you deserved it (4322)

On 01/31/2009 at 12:24pm - misc - by fuckit - United States (Ohio)

Today, I have been reading FML for 12 hours. FML

#4028
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35900) - you deserved it (13027)

On 01/31/2009 at 8:51am - misc - by ayw329 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was offered a job. It only took me a year and 17 interviews to get an offer, and I have a PhD. FML

#3922
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23929) - you deserved it (2522)

On 01/31/2009 at 12:37am - work - by RogerReady - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy the Plan B pill. The pharmacist recognized me and said, "Really? Again?" FML

#3333
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8199) - you deserved it (31191)

On 01/29/2009 at 10:19am - misc - by Hahaha - United States (California)

Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for 2 years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML

#3168
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27747) - you deserved it (3932)

On 01/28/2009 at 6:02pm - love - by john - United States (Kansas)

Today, I almost had an orgasm. Unfortunately, he had one first. FML

#3084
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46627) - you deserved it (6385)

On 01/28/2009 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by karma - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I posted on a forum asking if I could be a moderator. Instead, I got banned. FML

#3026
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5449) - you deserved it (23029)

On 01/28/2009 at 10:00am - misc - by hypebeast - United States (New York)

Today, I went to surprise my boyfriend in the shower. I opened the door and there was a giant shit in the open toilet. I pretended I was looking for my hairbrush. FML

#2705
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26233) - you deserved it (6477)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:45pm - intimacy - by bad surprise - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

#2696
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14817) - you deserved it (65965)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

#2696
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14817) - you deserved it (65965)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

#2696
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14817) - you deserved it (65965)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States



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