About GlobalElephant : I really like bananas
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I went to the Doctors and the nurse asked if I was married, in which I responded "yes". Then she asked if I was sexually active... "no". FML
I agree, your life sucks (65410) - you deserved it (8894)
On 02/23/2009 at 2:40pm - intimacy - by starbird (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, for my birthday my boyfriend bought me a sexy outfit to wear for him. At the bottom of the bag was a razor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26548) - you deserved it (13207)
On 02/22/2009 at 8:32pm - intimacy - by Noname - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went round to my Grandparents' to help set up their new Satellite TV. When I turned it on, for some reason it defaulted to "Arab Babes TV". I was therefore inadvertently responsible for the broadcast of porn in my Grandparents' living room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26960) - you deserved it (3517)
On 02/22/2009 at 5:55pm - misc - by Hello my name is (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I finally won an ongoing battle with my family to go to a restaurant I like, rather than a restaurant I hate with a passion. Now I'm throwing up, and my back is killing me. I'm the only one who got food poisoning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30014) - you deserved it (9434)
On 02/22/2009 at 2:02pm - health - by amandapurple (woman) - United States
Today, I had a job interview at a restauraunt opening up. One manager hypothetically asked me why I should be hired. I said I was more efficient than most. I left to find I'd locked my keys in the car. It took all the managers to help me get my keys out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8189) - you deserved it (22666)
On 02/21/2009 at 11:22pm - misc - by FailAtLife - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye. Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of my mouth. Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot and had lemon juice shoot right into my eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23422) - you deserved it (67206)
On 02/21/2009 at 9:07pm - intimacy - by svet (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while working on a carpentry project with my friend at 2am, and enjoying some beers, I cut my hand and realized I needed medical attention. Neither of us being in driving shape, I knocked on my parents bedroom door to request a ride. I was told I had to wait for them to "finish." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37662) - you deserved it (7246)
On 02/21/2009 at 7:39pm - misc - by Whothrewhim (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, and she asked me if I ever get made fun of in the locker room for my small penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80454) - you deserved it (5445)
On 02/21/2009 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Mike (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I came to school late because I had to drop off my daughter at school. When I got on campus, the security told me I was late but I said, "Oh no, I work here." and he said, "Oh like I haven't heard that one before." And he took me to detention. My boss, the Principal, had to bail me out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36708) - you deserved it (2047)
On 02/21/2009 at 6:22am - work - by Lily (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was sleeping when my roommate walked in and asked me: "So...when are you leaving?" She had decided to throw a party in our apartment. I wasn't invited. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32363) - you deserved it (1649)
On 02/19/2009 at 4:41pm - misc - by sen (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I woke up in a girls bed, that I have had a crush on for two years. She was sleeping on the floor with someone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38738) - you deserved it (3115)
On 02/19/2009 at 11:29am - misc - by VacationTSA (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I visited my brother in jail for the first time. I didn't know what to say so I blurted out : "Are you having fun ?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (8801) - you deserved it (37203)
On 02/19/2009 at 4:06am - misc - by cynicalcindy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, in school my shoulder was killing me from a softball injury. I went to the nurse's office and asked "Can I have some ice?" They responded with "Why, what happened to your face?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (36850) - you deserved it (1910)
On 02/19/2009 at 2:09am - misc - by Offended (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I told my long-distance girlfriend that I just could not handle the distance and we should just be friends. To which she responded, "What? You thought we were going out? Lol". FML
I agree, your life sucks (34693) - you deserved it (6279)
On 02/18/2009 at 7:43pm - misc - by Fack. (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went to McDonald's for lunch and ordered a salad. The man behind the counter looked at me and said "Well, at least you're trying." FML
I agree, your life sucks (46341) - you deserved it (6910)
On 02/18/2009 at 6:52pm - health - by blawbo (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
