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GlobalElephant

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GlobalElephant

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 10493
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About GlobalElephant : I really like bananas

GlobalElephant's page activity

Visits<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 10:57pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 8:58pm<b>Aspireworks</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 5:12am<b>shorty6823</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 5:51pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 5:15pm<b>iarefatal</b> - the 04/13/2013 at 8:01pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 04/13/2013 at 2:31pm<b>theawkwardlife</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 8:08pm<b>Budderchook</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 9:48pm<b>jxcala</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 6:40pm<b>Rhythmiz</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 7:32pm<b>lmfaowhatever</b> - the 02/11/2013 at 5:57pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 1:36pm<b>cass1_l0ve</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 8:22pm<b>Feelsgood</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 4:09pm<b>Sandra_W</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 4:41pm<b>SirEskimo</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 12:26pm<b>Bubule</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 12:56pm

GlobalElephant's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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GlobalElephant's favorite FMLs

Today, I Went To Chill With Best Guy Friend And His Girlfriend,hom I Recently Met After I Moved To The Area. After A Few Beers, Buddy Leaned Over And Tried To Make Out With Me. I Quickly Backed Up And Shockingly Looked Over At His Girlfriend To Expect The Same Reaction. She Winked. FML

#120277
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62968) - you deserved it (7168)

On 02/24/2009 at 12:30am - intimacy - by LilShawty2000 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I Went To Chill With Best Guy Friend And His Girlfriend,hom I Recently Met After I Moved To The Area. After A Few Beers, Buddy Leaned Over And Tried To Make Out With Me. I Quickly Backed Up And Shockingly Looked Over At His Girlfriend To Expect The Same Reaction. She Winked. FML

#120277
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62968) - you deserved it (7168)

On 02/24/2009 at 12:30am - intimacy - by LilShawty2000 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today , I went to the Doctors and the nurse asked if I was married , inhich I responded ( yes ). Then she asked if I was sexually active... ( no ). fat FML

#114016
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73117) - you deserved it (9641)

On 02/23/2009 at 2:40pm - intimacy - by starbird (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, for my brthday my boyfriend bought me a sexy outfit to wear for him. At the bottom of the bag was a razor. FML

#107726
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33382) - you deserved it (16993)

On 02/22/2009 at 8:32pm - intimacy - by Noname - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went round to mah Grandparents' to help set up there new Satellite TV. When I turned it on, for some reason it defaulted to "Arab Babes TV". I was therefore inadvertently responsible for the broadcast of porn in mah Grandparents' living room. real FML

#106107
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33630) - you deserved it (4347)

On 02/22/2009 at 5:55pm - misc - by Hello my name is (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I finally won an ongoing battle with family to go to a restaurant I like, rather than a restaurant I hate with a passion !! Now I'm throwing up, an back is killing me !! I'm the only oneho got food poisoning !! FML

#104112
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36899) - you deserved it (11332)

On 02/22/2009 at 2:02pm - health - by amandapurple (woman) - United States

Today I ad a job interview at a restauraunt opening up. One manager ypotetically askd me wy I sould be rd. I said I was more efficient tan most. I left to find I'd lockd ma keys in te car. It took all te managers to elp me get ma keys out. FML

#100454
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10749) - you deserved it (29726)

On 02/21/2009 at 11:22pm - misc - by FailAtLife - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was giving boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye!! Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of mouth!! Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot an had lemon juice shoot right into eye!! FML

#99356
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28359) - you deserved it (78280)

On 02/21/2009 at 9:07pm - intimacy - by svet (woman) - United States (New York)

2day whila working on a carpantry projact with mah friand at 2am... and anjoying soma baars... I cut mah hand and raalizad I naadad madical attantion. Naithar of us baing in driving shapa... I knockad on mah parants badroom door to raquast a rida. I was told I had to wait fir tham to ( finish. ) FML

TODAY , I WAS HAVING SEX WITH MAH GIRLFRIEND FIR THE FIRST TIME , AND SHE ASKED ME IF I EVER GET MADE FUN OF IN THE LOCKER ROOM FIR MAH SMALL PENIS!! FML

#97729
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92231) - you deserved it (6910)

On 02/21/2009 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Mike (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I came to school late because I had to drop off mah daughter at school!! When I got on campus, the security told me I was late but I said, "Oh no, I work here." and he said, "Oh like I haven't heard that one before." And he took me to detention!! My boss, the Principal, had to bail me out!! FML

#94927
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44515) - you deserved it (2803)

On 02/21/2009 at 6:22am - work - by Lily (woman) - United States (California)

I was sleepinghen my roommate walkd in and askd me: "So...when r u leaving?" She had decidd to throw a party in our apartment. I looool wasn't invitd. FML

#79632
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40377) - you deserved it (2345)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:41pm - misc - by sen (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today , I woka up in a girls bd , that I hava had a crush on fir two yaars. Sha was slaaping on tha floor with somaona alsa. FML

#77324
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45803) - you deserved it (3738)

On 02/19/2009 at 11:29am - misc - by VacationTSA (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I visited my brother in jail 4 the first time . I didn't know wat to say so I blurted out : "Are you having fun ?" FML

#76277
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12723) - you deserved it (46655)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:06am - misc - by cynicalcindy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, in scool ma soulder was killing me from a softball injury. I went to te nurse's office and asked "Can I ave some ice?" Tey responded wit "Wy,at appened to your face?" FML

#75712
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44610) - you deserved it (2613)

On 02/19/2009 at 2:09am - misc - by Offended (woman) - United States (New York)



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