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GetKayotic

Offline (the 03/30/2015 at 8:59am) | Search for a member

GetKayotic

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 521
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About GetKayotic : For those about to rock, we salute you.

GetKayotic's page activity

Visits<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 12:06am<b>suckmideck</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 6:33am<b>magnetic_aura</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:16am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:38am<b>paintedwings12</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 7:46am<b>kayana153</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:49am<b>brewer3800</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 5:09pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 12:41am<b>fleuretta</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 3:56am<b>jf_555</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 10:30pm<b>TheAtomicBomb</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 11:33pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 12:23pm<b>sean_coff</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 11:08am<b>TRaww21</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 4:07pm<b>pnutzmckracken</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 6:54pm<b>Mimi12589</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 2:27am<b>skittycat213</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 12:51am<b>brittbug99</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 11:22pm

GetKayotic's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of GetKayotic's badges

GetKayotic's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home from a crazy costume party and took a hot shower. When I opened my eyes and saw the water running from my head was bloody, I freaked out and called my friend for help. She had to remind me that for the party, I'd coloured my hair red with washable hair dye. FML

#21376371
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22690) - you deserved it (15244)

On 03/17/2015 at 12:52pm - health - by Iwtumn (woman) - Austria

Today, I accidentally ate a cat treat instead of a cinnamon glazed pecan. I thought it must have been burnt by the way it tasted, so ate a few more before I figured out my mistake and spat them out. FML

#21376174
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22493) - you deserved it (12252)

On 03/17/2015 at 3:14am - animals - by ilovecharliesheen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I worked up the courage to tell my girlfriend that I love her. She made a face like she'd just sucked on a lemon and said "Um... yay, I guess...?" and awkwardly left the room. FML

#21374314
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30279) - you deserved it (2512)

On 03/14/2015 at 7:04am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Flevoland)

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

#21369938
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32556) - you deserved it (3035)

On 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by killme (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, as I was riding my bike home from school, I saw a homeless man sitting on a bench. I was about to walk up to him and give him money, but before I could do anything my mother walked up and kissed him. My mom is dating this guy. FML

#21368890
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35112) - you deserved it (2782)

On 03/05/2015 at 8:38pm - love - by Not Homeless - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I'm faced with the prospect of having to defend my sister from a herd of very angry bronies. FML

#21368771
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24176) - you deserved it (2087)

On 03/05/2015 at 5:34pm - misc - by Why? - United States (Colorado)

Today, during a family game of "Cards Against Humanity," I had to explain to my mom what queefing is. FML

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11) - you deserved it (8)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I met my biological parents for the first time, 29 years into my life. They turned out to be two of the most pathetic people I have ever met, and the meeting ended after they asked me to lend them money because I "literally owe them my life." FML

#21364287
161 comments

Today, a man approached me and told me he wanted to drink my dirty bath water. FML

Today, my extremely hot coworker told me that I smelled good. At a complete loss for words, I replied, "Oh, I'm sure I don't." FML

#21359386
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27458) - you deserved it (4813)

On 02/19/2015 at 7:14pm - misc - by thisiswhyimavirgin (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I gave birth to a baby girl. Where was my husband after the agony finally ended? Standing just outside the room, flirting with a nurse. FML

#21355574
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35049) - you deserved it (2917)

On 02/13/2015 at 9:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

#21354315
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18761) - you deserved it (35615)

On 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm - misc - by SDCore (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my Breaking Bad obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks." during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML

#21347719
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30227) - you deserved it (3297)

On 02/01/2015 at 11:17am - intimacy - by SKYYYLLLARRRR!!!! (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. In the middle of it he said, "I want us to be covalent bonds". I didn't understand what he meant, and he actually stopped to explain it to me. FML

#21346746
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25648) - you deserved it (6818)

On 01/30/2015 at 10:11am - intimacy - by Chemist-why (woman) - United States (California)



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