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GetKayotic

Offline (the 08/29/2015 at 11:20am) | Search for a member

GetKayotic

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 781
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About GetKayotic : For those about to rock, we salute you.

GetKayotic's page activity

Visits<b>M3talJunki3</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 11:55pm<b>MikeonFML</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 8:52am<b>Cads1</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:58am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:55am<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 12:06am<b>suckmideck</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 6:33am<b>magnetic_aura</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:16am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:38am<b>paintedwings12</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 7:46am<b>kayana153</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:49am<b>brewer3800</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 5:09pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 12:41am<b>fleuretta</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 3:56am<b>jf_555</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 10:30pm<b>TheAtomicBomb</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 11:33pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 12:23pm<b>sean_coff</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 11:08am<b>TRaww21</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 4:07pm

GetKayotic's FML badges

50 favourites

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of GetKayotic's badges

GetKayotic's favorite FMLs

Today, I happily announced to my parents that I'm pregnant. My dad later handed me a printout containing a list of nearby abortion clinics. FML

#21461568
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23104) - you deserved it (2078)

On 08/28/2015 at 1:06am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23783) - you deserved it (6114)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, I told my boyfriend I was scared to open up to him because I had lost people in the past by doing so. After an hour of him trying to convince me to share my thoughts with him, I finally agreed to tell him some things that were worrying me. He broke up with me a minute later. FML

#21454874
101 comments

Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML

#21450062
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25027) - you deserved it (1804)

On 07/31/2015 at 2:28pm - misc - by ppema (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over the phone, after having left me to look after her dog while she went on a 2-week vacation with her family. Now I have to choose between paying for a kennel for her damn dog or taking care of it every day until she gets back. FML

#21448527
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24188) - you deserved it (2025)

On 07/28/2015 at 11:18am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a girl with a picture of One Direction as her desktop asked if I wanted to partner with her on a 70% law assignment. Two hours after saying no, I found out that she's a legal genius with a guaranteed job in the field and a near perfect GPA. FML

#21445322
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10873) - you deserved it (47247)

On 07/22/2015 at 2:18am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I was at a professional tennis match. The ball was hit extremely hard, resulting in it going into the crowd. And when I say crowd, I mean my face. FML

#21443966
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22136) - you deserved it (1925)

On 07/19/2015 at 10:36am - health - by Ouch - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I watched a young shop assistant try her hardest to flirt with my 20-year-old son. When he continued to be totally oblivious, she outright invited him back to her flat. When he asked, "What for?" a piece of my soul died at how completely I have failed as a father. FML

#21442690
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32553) - you deserved it (4582)

On 07/16/2015 at 6:21pm - kids - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my psycho ex girlfriend got up in my face after I dumped her. She said I'm going to pay and that one day, when I think I'm safe and happy, my joy will turn to ash in my mouth. When I pointed out she'd just ripped off a Game of Thrones quote, she kneed me in the balls. FML

#21439786
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25991) - you deserved it (3678)

On 07/10/2015 at 10:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife was in seemingly never-ending labor. It got so bad, I overheard a nurse in the doorway mutter to a coworker that she hoped my baby would just die or something, so she could finally go take a smoke break. FML

#21439756
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35574) - you deserved it (1699)

On 07/10/2015 at 9:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a week after my miscarriage, my little sister thought it appropriate to wrap her belt around her neck and scream, "Hey look, it's your baby!" FML

#21438976
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39357) - you deserved it (2167)

On 07/09/2015 at 10:38am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was working customer service at a large grocery store. I recently got a small, tasteful septum piercing that is barely visible. As I greeted a customer, she began to gag, held out her hand as though she was fending me off, and said, "I can't. Your nose ring makes me sick." FML

#21437504
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21277) - you deserved it (8862)

On 07/06/2015 at 5:37pm - work - by a_dani365 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I heard my skinny 14-year-old daughter tell her friend, "Ugh, I wish I had leukemia or something so that I could lose weight." Yes, she actually said that. FML

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31786) - you deserved it (2304)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)



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