GetKayotic

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Offline (the 10/21/2015 at 10:34am)

GetKayotic

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1289
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About GetKayotic : For those about to rock, we salute you.

GetKayotic's page activity

Visits<b>Emmalyne606777</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 8:56pm<b>M3talJunki3</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 11:55pm<b>MikeonFML</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 8:52am<b>Cads1</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:58am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:55am<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 12:06am<b>suckmideck</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 6:33am<b>magnetic_aura</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:16am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:38am<b>paintedwings12</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 7:46am<b>kayana153</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:49am<b>brewer3800</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 5:09pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 12:41am<b>fleuretta</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 3:56am<b>jf_555</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 10:30pm<b>TheAtomicBomb</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 11:33pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 12:23pm<b>sean_coff</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 11:08am

GetKayotic's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of GetKayotic's badges

GetKayotic's favorite FMLs

Today, my life became a lot more depressing. A while ago, some friends and I founded a "Forever Alone" club, because all of us were single at that time. I'm now the only member left. FML

by Lena / 10/18/2015 at 1:06pm / Germany / Love

Today, my parents pranked me hard. They spent breakfast messing with my head, all to convince me that I was dreaming. I got so excited at finally having a lucid dream that I ran outside in my pajamas, yelling "Woo-hoo!" and trying to fly. Nothing happened. People saw. FML

by Anonymous / 10/02/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, while eating at my college cafeteria, I started thinking about all the awful crap going on in my life right now, and I started sobbing. Some guy at another table started snickering at me, at which point the guy I like said, "Give her a break. If I was as fuck-ugly as her, I'd be crying too." FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2015 at 9:21am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I dropped my toothbrush. Because I have the spatial awareness of a mentally-retarded gnat, I hit my head against the sink as I bent down to get it. Then I did the same on the way back up, almost KO'ing myself. My boyfriend saw the whole thing and nearly pissed himself laughing. FML

by dammit / 09/12/2015 at 4:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I told to my girlfriend of 5 years that I'm depressed about having no friends, no job and a difficult family life. I told her that she's the one constant that keeps me going. She decided this was a good time to break up with me to "find" herself, since I was being so mopey. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2015 at 2:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I had an argument with my boyfriend who was accusing me of only being in a relationship with him because I'd fantasised about being with an Asian. When I told him he was wrong, he asked me what attracted me to him in the first place. "Your eyes" was definitely the wrong answer. FML

by Anonyme / 09/02/2015 at 12:21am / Love

Today, I happily announced to my parents that I'm pregnant. My dad later handed me a printout containing a list of nearby abortion clinics. FML

by Anonymous / 08/28/2015 at 1:06am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay / 08/21/2015 at 11:25am / Malta / Kids

Today, I told my boyfriend I was scared to open up to him because I had lost people in the past by doing so. After an hour of him trying to convince me to share my thoughts with him, I finally agreed to tell him some things that were worrying me. He broke up with me a minute later. FML

by Lady_Gunslinger9 / 08/11/2015 at 5:38pm / United Kingdom (Durham) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML

by ppema / 07/31/2015 at 2:28pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over the phone, after having left me to look after her dog while she went on a 2-week vacation with her family. Now I have to choose between paying for a kennel for her damn dog or taking care of it every day until she gets back. FML

by Anonymous / 07/28/2015 at 11:18am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, a girl with a picture of One Direction as her desktop asked if I wanted to partner with her on a 70% law assignment. Two hours after saying no, I found out that she's a legal genius with a guaranteed job in the field and a near perfect GPA. FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2015 at 2:18am / Work

Today, I was at a professional tennis match. The ball was hit extremely hard, resulting in it going into the crowd. And when I say crowd, I mean my face. FML

by Ouch / 07/19/2015 at 10:36am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I watched a young shop assistant try her hardest to flirt with my 20-year-old son. When he continued to be totally oblivious, she outright invited him back to her flat. When he asked, "What for?" a piece of my soul died at how completely I have failed as a father. FML

by anonymous / 07/16/2015 at 6:21pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, my psycho ex girlfriend got up in my face after I dumped her. She said I'm going to pay and that one day, when I think I'm safe and happy, my joy will turn to ash in my mouth. When I pointed out she'd just ripped off a Game of Thrones quote, she kneed me in the balls. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2015 at 10:42pm / United States (Texas) / Health