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GetKayotic

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GetKayotic

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 642
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About GetKayotic : For those about to rock, we salute you.

GetKayotic's page activity

Visits<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:55am<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 12:06am<b>suckmideck</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 6:33am<b>magnetic_aura</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:16am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:38am<b>paintedwings12</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 7:46am<b>kayana153</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:49am<b>brewer3800</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 5:09pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 12:41am<b>fleuretta</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 3:56am<b>jf_555</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 10:30pm<b>TheAtomicBomb</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 11:33pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 12:23pm<b>sean_coff</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 11:08am<b>TRaww21</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 4:07pm<b>pnutzmckracken</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 6:54pm<b>Mimi12589</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 2:27am<b>skittycat213</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 12:51am

GetKayotic's FML badges

50 favourites

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of GetKayotic's badges

GetKayotic's favorite FMLs

Today, my cat has decided she can't eat unless I'm right there with her, so when she gets hungry she finds me and howls until I follow her to her food dish. She likes to eat pretty frequently, and I'm already getting a headache. FML

Today, my girlfriend suggested we start using a safe word during sex - not because we're into BDSM or anything like that, it's just in case she gets bored and wants me to stop. FML

#21412386
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27381) - you deserved it (4355)

On 05/19/2015 at 2:45am - intimacy - by username - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I went to a domestic violence counseling group. I was the only male there, and I explained that my girlfriend punches me in the face in front of my kids. Everyone started laughing. FML

Today, I was supporting my aunt as she gave birth. She was getting tired during the pushing stage, so I tried to encourage her by making a show of pushing as well with each contraction. I got a little too into it and accidentally gave birth to a little turd of my own. FML

Today, I had to pick my brother up from work because he broke down crying. I arrived to find that apparently, you can get so stoned that serving a pregnant woman at a fast food joint moves you to tears over the miracle of life. FML

#21409953
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29702) - you deserved it (2206)

On 05/14/2015 at 10:23am - misc - by sistertaxi - Australia

Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put it in a box on my bed. I never had a tarantula, and the box was empty when I checked. FML

#21409835
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28590) - you deserved it (2150)

On 05/14/2015 at 1:11am - animals - by cricketsins (woman) - United States

Today, while out shopping with friends, I was apphrehended by two bounty hunters because they recognized my purple-dyed hair. Too bad my name isn't Natalie, who apparently shares the same hair color. They didn't believe me, even after I showed my ID. FML

Today, my 6-year-old daughter barged into the bathroom while I was peeing, inspected the toilet and said, "You're well hydrated, good job." FML

#21405462
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28537) - you deserved it (3362)

On 05/06/2015 at 1:22am - kids - by seethroughpee - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my fiancé called me 'thick' for not realising he'd been sleeping with his ex earlier. FML

Today, due to awkward circumstances, I am living with my ex-girlfriend and her new girlfriend. FML

Today, while with a large group of friends, my best friend started talking about my struggles with dating and intimacy. I quietly asked her to stop talking about it, as it was personal and I wasn't comfortable with everyone else knowing. Her response? "Um, it's really none of your business." FML

Today, while out walking with my son in a stroller, a couple passed by and the girl smiled sweetly at him. It made me really happy, until we passed and I heard her say "What? You're supposed to smile at babies, even if they look weird." FML

#21399622
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29083) - you deserved it (2291)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML

#21399141
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30086) - you deserved it (3557)

On 04/24/2015 at 6:04pm - kids - by anonymousyo - United States (California)

Today, I learned that, when you ask your girlfriend "Do you think we're having sex too often?" she might interpret it as, "I don't think we should have sex ever again," and entirely stop talking to you. FML

#21398912
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23854) - you deserved it (10694)

On 04/24/2015 at 7:38am - intimacy - by Sexless from Texas - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss gave me the job of dealing with the guys doing the roofing at our store. His reasoning is that since we're all Hispanic, I'm perfect for the job because "You guys all know each other." FML

#21397904
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28513) - you deserved it (2453)

On 04/22/2015 at 11:06am - work - by -_- (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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