GeniusInABottle

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Offline (the 08/10/2014 at 9:19pm)

GeniusInABottle

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3812
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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GeniusInABottle's page activity

Visits<b>Bustedbutsilent</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 4:23pm<b>mattjamt</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 8:47am<b>Faddyy6</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 7:29pm<b>SystemofaBlink41</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 2:07pm<b>devilsaide</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 1:54pm<b>gracehi</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 1:03pm<b>evilamoebaattack</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:27am<b>yamzie47</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 12:20pm<b>sophiurr</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 4:57pm<b>trigger42</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 7:43pm<b>CASMITTY133</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 10:48pm<b>Got7Dorks</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 7:09pm<b>jnunez0517</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 3:54pm<b>Rallred32</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 6:20pm<b>Dailym27</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 4:31pm<b>tr_guy79</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 3:42pm<b>swick25</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 3:10pm<b>skellingtonfart</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 5:43am

GeniusInABottle's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The rules are the rules

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See all of GeniusInABottle's badges

GeniusInABottle's favorite FMLs

Today, on my way home on my motorbike from a great party in the early hours of the morning, I was feeling pretty good about myself. Riding over a hill, I yawned in anticipation of climbing into bed. A huge winged bastard insect thing then flew straight into my throat. FML

by Nearly Crashed / 05/27/2013 at 9:42am / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, as I was lying on my bed with one of my arms hanging from the side, I felt something sniff my hand from underneath. I don't have any pets. FML

by scared-straight / 05/27/2013 at 12:05am / United States / Animals

Today, I invited my boyfriend to come to an event to meet some of my friends for the first time. I had been raving about him for weeks, and everyone was curious to meet this "amazing guy" I'd been dating. He showed up in a Darth Vader costume because he thought it would be funny to embarrass me. FML

by JJLight / 05/26/2013 at 11:14pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, a man asked about fishing in the river which flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:40pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Work

Today, I got on the subway with a broken leg. A kind woman stood up and offered me her seat. Before I could sit down, a guy shoved past me and took it for himself. The woman and I pointed out my cast and crutches, and asked him to give up the seat. He responded by flipping us off. FML

by a hex upon your anus, sir / 05/25/2013 at 12:14pm / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML

by redneckfamily / 05/24/2013 at 3:06am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML

by crappingrapping / 05/21/2013 at 11:01am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, my boss made me go outside and wash people's cars for free. I work at Verizon. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2013 at 2:31am / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

by well okay then / 05/20/2013 at 12:02pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

by harrington61 / 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML

by Anonymous / 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, my doorknob broke. While trying to impress my dad and show that I can fix things for girls, I somehow managed to lock myself in my room, with the doorknob on the other side of the door. When my dad finally heard my screams, he let me out. He had to take the whole door off. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2013 at 1:03pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me straight in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML

by sumhub94 / 05/14/2013 at 12:48pm / United States / Work