![[fr]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn4.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
About GazeboFoppery : I am a West Coast Canadian, an Anthropologist, and a teacher.
I've traveled and taught all around the world, and love every inch of this great planet.
I welcome respectful disagreement and discussion.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19318) - you deserved it (3664)
On 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14353) - you deserved it (6724)
On 03/14/2010 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my husband and I were going to have sex for the first time since having our baby, who was taking a nap. As soon as we lay down in bed, his mother rang saying she was five minutes away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15074) - you deserved it (1348)
On 02/26/2010 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by Ineedit (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boss made me some Tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my number 1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19606) - you deserved it (3731)
On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by meaganlea (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was working at Publix ringing up some 70 year old woman. She says "Man, you're a fast cashier, I like my men fast!" and then gives me a wink. I got really nervous and didn't know how to respond, so not thinking, I quickly said, "Yeah, me too." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17613) - you deserved it (4991)
On 02/22/2010 at 8:29pm - work - by Patrick (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I discovered that when business is slow at my family-owned store, my daughter and another employee make a habit of sneaking away to the back room. I have literally been paying this kid to screw around with my daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21833) - you deserved it (3373)
On 02/19/2010 at 3:36pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my little sister walked in on me and my boyfriend. I told her I would give her 10$ if she just pretended it never happened. She agreed, walked out and shut the door. Later, when my parents arrived, she yells: "Nicole and Joe were naked upstairs!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (15112) - you deserved it (12481)
On 02/19/2010 at 12:31am - kids - by ohemgee23 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12133) - you deserved it (3453)
On 02/14/2010 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by klsdhjla (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11624) - you deserved it (4148)
On 02/10/2010 at 10:08am - intimacy - by ryan - United States
Today, my son learned about various animals in school, and how they urinate to mark their territory. Apparently, the entire second floor of my house is now my son's territory. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22068) - you deserved it (1608)
On 02/07/2010 at 7:35pm - kids - by grrrr - United States
Today, I was in the car with my 16 year old daughter. There was a guy on a fast looking motorcycle next to me at the stop light. I yelled to him to "get it up!" so that he would do a wheelie. Just before the light turned green he yelled back, "You're too old for me, but I'll get it up for her!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (4905) - you deserved it (15750)
On 02/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I told my girlfriend's father that I wanted to talk about his daughter. I then went on to tell him I was thinking about 'popping the cherry', instead of 'popping the question'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12292) - you deserved it (8102)
On 02/04/2010 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by stoopidpoop (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13255) - you deserved it (3663)
On 02/02/2010 at 7:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I had to explain to my son that his dad was too busy in a raid on World of Warcraft to be at his award ceremony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37612) - you deserved it (29261)
On 02/02/2010 at 3:30pm - kids - by fuckmylife (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my mother gave my daughter a behavior chart. I noticed that "drinking beer" was at the top of one of the columns. It's a chart for my daughter to use on me so my mother can judge my parenting skills. I am currently losing a sticker right now for being on the computer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22320) - you deserved it (3136)
On 02/01/2010 at 8:17am - kids - by argh (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
