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GKnee

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GKnee
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 73
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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GKnee's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that I'm so lonely I can no longer whack off without bursting into tears and crying like a little bitch. FML

#20564779
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35733) - you deserved it (13688)

On 03/29/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was on a girls' trip in Las Vegas. I met a cute guy at a bar and we were going back to his hotel room together. On the way up, he asked me how much it would cost. FML

#20564361
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41161) - you deserved it (18077)

On 03/28/2013 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by Hooker (woman) - United States

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40569) - you deserved it (15293)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

#20533607
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50219) - you deserved it (13070)

On 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by RedWaters - United States

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

#20523671
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40518) - you deserved it (5136)

On 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by Frostbitten (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my parents told me that I'm no longer allowed to come home from boarding school on weekends because it will confuse my cats and disrupt their lives. FML

#20519879
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37478) - you deserved it (2423)

On 02/24/2013 at 6:17am - animals - by incendiaaa (woman) - Australia

Today, I had to spend a few hours in a hospital with a toddler and a preschooler projecting vomit all over, because my husband thinks "expiration dates are for pussies." FML

#20511774
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30007) - you deserved it (2908)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:44am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assured her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and mugged me. FML

#20505342
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38384) - you deserved it (4332)

On 02/13/2013 at 7:00pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML

#20498998
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30283) - you deserved it (7881)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML

#20494543
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34048) - you deserved it (3009)

On 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm - misc - by Experience (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was helping clean my grandpa's garage when I found some of his old election posters from the '50s. They included slogans such as, "Dick: you know it feels right" and "Want growth? Choose Dick." I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed. FML

#17279382
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24365) - you deserved it (3977)

On 07/27/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67095) - you deserved it (6318)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34914) - you deserved it (3289)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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