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FucYoCouch

Offline (the 02/23/2014 at 5:10pm) | Search for a member

FucYoCouch

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 18 November 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 250
  • Number of comments : 85
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About FucYoCouch : I am eighteen years old. I moved to the U.S when I turned twenty and recently got engaged when I turned fifteen. I've played guitar, Piano, and drums since I was eight and I plan to travel the world at twelve years old. Oh yeah, and I became a teacher at twenty three years old c: How old am I? The world may never know ;D

FucYoCouch's page activity

Visits<b>theblockdude</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 3:11am<b>cutiesoprano22</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 8:18am<b>Jenra</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 3:16am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:30am<b>Adeptasaurus</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 12:17am<b>krupa1017</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 12:01pm<b>bassguitar98</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 4:11am<b>salamander461</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 9:12am<b>CloudBustah</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 7:14pm<b>TheFirstHipster</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 11:01pm<b>mikbrooke</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 5:49pm<b>ArmyDoc</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 3:36pm<b>Effulgence</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 1:44pm<b>tori_1434</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 12:53am<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:19pm<b>Soulsbane96</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 1:15pm<b>i_wuz_nver_here</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 12:06pm<b>MaybeMoo</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:38am

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FucYoCouch's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

#21131626
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38711) - you deserved it (4258)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm - health - by randomusername99 - United States (New York)

Today, I met up with my group for class. We were doing some final checks on the project we've been working on all semester, when I realized something about one guy's work seemed off. I googled it and found out it's almost completely plagiarized. It's all due in the morning. FML

#21130579
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40408) - you deserved it (3649)

On 05/04/2014 at 2:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he was moaning a lot. My ego was quickly crushed, though, when I found out they were moans of pain due to a foot cramp. We had to stop so I could rub his foot better. FML

#21120108
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45979) - you deserved it (5698)

On 04/22/2014 at 6:21pm - intimacy - by only my life (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, at my wedding, my husband stood up to give a speech. It started out beautiful, until he told everyone how he started to fall in love with me after I blew him on our first date. FML

#21118892
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53627) - you deserved it (13345)

On 04/21/2014 at 11:43am - intimacy - by Sue Ellen (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, the guy I live with demanded that I get a job or start paying rent. It'd be perfectly reasonable, if he wasn't my husband, and if I hadn't just given birth to our first child. FML

#21110568
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47174) - you deserved it (5365)

On 04/11/2014 at 7:49pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I'm in the process of adopting a child. When I called my mom to tell her the news, she just said, "Oh honey, don't adopt, it's the worst decision you'll ever make." I'm adopted. FML

#21110479
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47212) - you deserved it (2972)

On 04/11/2014 at 5:58pm - kids - by babylove - South Africa

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

#21110266
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40284) - you deserved it (2978)

On 04/11/2014 at 12:38pm - misc - by Cuntlette (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

#21110266
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40284) - you deserved it (2978)

On 04/11/2014 at 12:38pm - misc - by Cuntlette (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that my three closest online friends are the same person: my obsessive ex. I met all three before he and I even started dating. FML

#21105963
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39936) - you deserved it (5172)

On 04/06/2014 at 2:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I called my mom to ask for some help with my dishwasher. Somehow, the call got turned into a video call. I was wearing a bathrobe, and she was naked in her bathroom. Most awkward call ever. FML

#21105694
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37744) - you deserved it (4544)

On 04/06/2014 at 2:57am - misc - by FaceTime issues - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of pee all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML

#21105380
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37888) - you deserved it (5785)

On 04/05/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, my girlfriend and I were snuggling and we placed our hands together, palm to palm. I can bend the tips of my fingers over hers, which apparently surprised her because she commented, "Huh, so big hands AREN'T related to penis size." FML

#21101616
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53499) - you deserved it (6826)

On 04/01/2014 at 2:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dad got me one of those word locks for my gym locker, for which the password had to be a four-letter word instead of numbers. My dad chose the combo for me. It was "diet". FML

#21101196
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35619) - you deserved it (5222)

On 03/31/2014 at 6:10pm - health - by anon (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. Not only was he boring, he twice excused himself to go to the bathroom and both times he came back smelling of weed. FML

#21101191
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38963) - you deserved it (6203)

On 03/31/2014 at 6:05pm - love - by Jaime - United States (New York)

Today, while on patrol with my partner, we came across a guy getting a beat-down on the sidewalk. After restraining the attacker, we helped the victim to his feet, only for him to spit at us and call us "goddamn pigs". You're welcome, sir. FML

#21101111
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40828) - you deserved it (4030)

On 03/31/2014 at 4:07pm - work - by dunno why we bother (man) - United States (Florida)



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