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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 6 September 1965 (50 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9351
  • Number of comments : 3240
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About False_Stupidity : Nothing to see here... Move along

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I told you there was nothing here, but you just had to look!

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False_Stupidity's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (46808) - you deserved it (4477)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:19am - animals - by PerfectTiming - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, the massive bogey that had been dangling precariously from my manager's nose for half an hour finally detached itself. Into my coffee. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47096) - you deserved it (5093)

On 07/03/2013 at 5:09am - work - by melons (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML


I agree, your life sucks (72591) - you deserved it (4448)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, on my way home on my motorbike from a great party in the early hours of the morning, I was feeling pretty good about myself. Riding over a hill, I yawned in anticipation of climbing into bed. A huge winged bastard insect thing then flew straight into my throat. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47482) - you deserved it (8792)

On 05/27/2013 at 9:42am - animals - by Nearly Crashed (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my stalker ex girlfriend turned up at my wedding, uninvited, wearing a wedding dress. FML


I agree, your life sucks (93003) - you deserved it (5877)

On 05/11/2013 at 2:25am - love - by tdrtnlz - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, I found out that Yale had actually accepted me seventeen years ago. My mother apparently burned my acceptance package and letters because she didn't want me to upstage her UChicago degree. FML

Today, with 24 inches of snow on the ground, it is raining like hell. The weight of the snow, now full of rain water, collapsed the roof over my living room. I was eating cereal in my underwear, in the living room, directly under the failure. I'm cold. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44746) - you deserved it (3658)

On 02/11/2013 at 3:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I attended my first surgery as part of my program at med school. I found out that when I see someone's intestines, I vomit. Even if I'm still wearing a surgical mask. There goes the thousands of dollars I spent on college. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31037) - you deserved it (6391)

On 02/05/2013 at 10:08pm - health - by A troubled ex med school student - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got so lonely I decided to make sock puppets and play with them. I played for four hours straight, only to be interrupted by a phone call. I didn't answer because my sock puppets were "on a date" and I didn't want to stop playing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33674) - you deserved it (21321)

On 02/02/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by ineedalife (woman) - Australia

Today, my pants ripped while I was at work. I had to keep my balls to the wall while I dodged customers and edged ever closer to the break room. Before I could call my wife and ask her to bring a new pair, my boss burst in, got pissed, and made me go back out and deal with irate customers. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28096) - you deserved it (2308)

On 01/31/2013 at 3:27pm - work - by fuckit (man) - Italy (Lazio)

Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35414) - you deserved it (4904) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by jay ze punk - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I made a new friend: the cricket the doctor pulled out of my ear canal. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34191) - you deserved it (3299)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:53am - animals - by Ear Invasion - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I made my first snowman ever, and then cried when my big brother kicked it to pieces. I'm 27. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32944) - you deserved it (9863)

On 01/23/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I asked him to make me some coffee too. When he brought me my drink, I took a sip, and realized he'd poured salt in it. As I gagged, he muttered, "Next time, make it yourself." FML


I agree, your life sucks (31660) - you deserved it (7719)

On 01/20/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by megean c.l. (woman) - United States

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Friday 27 November 2015

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