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False_Stupidity

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False_Stupidity
  • Town/Country : Somewhere, Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 5 September 1975 (37 years)
  • Number of visits : 1439
  • Number of comments : 1313
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About False_Stupidity : Nothing to see here... Move along

False_Stupidity's last visitors

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False_Stupidity's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of False_Stupidity's badges

False_Stupidity's favorite FMLs

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

#20199980
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18859) - you deserved it (3648)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML

#20184636
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24521) - you deserved it (6481)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by lizzard0416 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
528 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63005) - you deserved it (6333)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10679) - you deserved it (42689)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

#20049241
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27112) - you deserved it (1362)

On 08/30/2012 at 8:58am - misc - by Sarah - United States (New York)

Today, I lost two terabytes' worth of photos to a friend's incompetence. He said he could save me some money and fix my slow computer for free. He ended up wiping the hard drive, and along with it, my photography portfolio from the last five years. FML

#20032826
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15832) - you deserved it (10321)

On 08/20/2012 at 10:30pm - misc - by ThisGirl (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I lost two terabytes' worth of photos to a friend's incompetence. He said he could save me some money and fix my slow computer for free. He ended up wiping the hard drive, and along with it, my photography portfolio from the last five years. FML

#20032826
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15832) - you deserved it (10321)

On 08/20/2012 at 10:30pm - misc - by ThisGirl (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after sex, my boyfriend and I lay in bed for a couple of hours just chatting. This would have been lovely. However, his topic of choice for post-coital pillow talk was his theory about how Chewbacca is secretly the leader of the Rebel Alliance. It actually made sense. FML

#20020311
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15467) - you deserved it (4819)

On 08/14/2012 at 8:17am - intimacy - by cl4ptp (woman) - United Kingdom (Vale of Glamorgan, The)

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

#20015589
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10614) - you deserved it (32523)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

#20012782
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22237) - you deserved it (11939)

On 08/10/2012 at 1:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I was at the store with my grandpa. When we were rung up, he started to pay for our myriad groceries in coins, and the guy behind us groaned. My grandpa said, "shut your mouth," and started ranting about how stupid people are to leave paper trails for "government spooks." FML

#20006151
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12578) - you deserved it (1191)

On 08/06/2012 at 5:37pm - money - by for fucks sake gramps (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, while attempting the Italian Chandelier with my girlfriend, I heard a popping noise, and then had a sharp pain in my dick. Turns out I "broke" it. Instead of calling 911 immediately, my girlfriend remarked how my now black and blue penis looked like a Smurf. FML

#20003323
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21125) - you deserved it (5060)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had an ovarian cyst rupture at work, causing sudden severe stomach cramps; this caused my bowels to release everything right then and there, while on the phone with a customer, in the middle of the call center surrounded by 200 other sales reps. FML

#19991299
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23162) - you deserved it (937)

On 07/29/2012 at 7:34pm - health - by sy123 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8862) - you deserved it (31271)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I finally realized how depressed I am when I found bubble wrap and didn't feel like popping it. FML

#19957944
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26307) - you deserved it (2105)

On 07/19/2012 at 5:01am - health - by Epiphany (man) - United States



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