Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

False_Stupidity

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

False_Stupidity

16Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 6 September 1935 (79 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5869
  • Number of comments : 2338
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About False_Stupidity : Nothing to see here... Move along












... See!
I told you there was nothing here, but you just had to look!

False_Stupidity's page activity

Visits<b>TonyTalkingClock</b> - 5 hours ago<b>Rezno777</b> - 21 hours ago<b>jbbc</b> - yesterday at 7:16pm<b>854alice</b> - yesterday at 8:25am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - yesterday at 3:01am<b>dfair1987</b> - yesterday at 2:04am<b>SoliDSt33L</b> - yesterday at 10:42pm<b>ScarlieC</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 8:10pm<b>_Reign_</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 2:57pm<b>ArturoRamirez</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 8:17pm<b>Ogodwhyzzz</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 6:39pm<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 6:26pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 2:03am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 8:31pm<b>joyboy390</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 10:31pm<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 8:20pm<b>mcaisse77</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 7:12pm<b>MrLemonGrab</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 11:47am

Liked!<b>ScarlieC</b> - yesterday at 2:10am<b>Creeper_Guy_237</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 7:17am<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 6:44am<b>umadbromad</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 4:43am<b>kittykwonie</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 4:43am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 5:30pm<b>annamaria55555</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 2:39pm<b>Cupcake040</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 2:23am<b>b_d_hill</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:19pm<b>thatsLEGENDARY</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 12:10pm<b>normal_shy_kid</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 7:38pm<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 12:35pm<b>BakenWake420</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 6:56am<b>TheViPeRisT</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 5:00am<b>CrAzYELF4</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 4:32am<b>thorus</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 12:13am

False_Stupidity's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of False_Stupidity's badges

False_Stupidity's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister and her two-year-old came to my place for a visit. Not long after arriving, my niece ripped off her diaper and immediately took a dump on my white carpet. Guess who had to 'suddenly' leave afterwards, leaving me to clean up the mess. FML

#20892017
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39575) - you deserved it (2672)

On 09/22/2013 at 8:08pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my mom found my dad's hidden stash of cigarettes. He told her they were mine and now I have to spend two hours at therapy for my "smoking problem" every weekend. I've never smoked. FML

#20889651
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47713) - you deserved it (3197)

On 09/21/2013 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I woke up and saw that my alarm clock had fallen on the floor. It read 9:05 am. I panicked because I was late for work. As I frantically got ready, I went to pick my alarm clock up to place it back on my nightstand when I realized it was upside down. The actual time was 5:06. FML

#20879453
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39180) - you deserved it (6701)

On 09/13/2013 at 9:24am - misc - by NoorFML (woman) - United States

Today, a customer screamed at me, because her iced coffee tasted exactly like coffee, and she hates coffee. Sadly, this isn't even the most insane person I've had to deal with at this job. FML

#20820474
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46120) - you deserved it (2759)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:09pm - work - by Neanderthals walk among us (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, my dentist dropped dead of a heart attack. This depressing event was made worse by the fact that he collapsed while his hands were in my mouth. FML

Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML

#20770214
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44211) - you deserved it (4215)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:19am - animals - by PerfectTiming - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, the massive bogey that had been dangling precariously from my manager's nose for half an hour finally detached itself. Into my coffee. FML

#20761277
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44588) - you deserved it (4845)

On 07/03/2013 at 5:09am - work - by melons (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

#20701323
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69427) - you deserved it (4244)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, on my way home on my motorbike from a great party in the early hours of the morning, I was feeling pretty good about myself. Riding over a hill, I yawned in anticipation of climbing into bed. A huge winged bastard insect thing then flew straight into my throat. FML

#20689016
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44641) - you deserved it (8342)

On 05/27/2013 at 9:42am - animals - by Nearly Crashed (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my stalker ex girlfriend turned up at my wedding, uninvited, wearing a wedding dress. FML

#20655660
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88791) - you deserved it (5628)

On 05/11/2013 at 2:25am - love - by tdrtnlz - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, I found out that Yale had actually accepted me seventeen years ago. My mother apparently burned my acceptance package and letters because she didn't want me to upstage her UChicago degree. FML

Today, with 24 inches of snow on the ground, it is raining like hell. The weight of the snow, now full of rain water, collapsed the roof over my living room. I was eating cereal in my underwear, in the living room, directly under the failure. I'm cold. FML

#20502433
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41498) - you deserved it (3404)

On 02/11/2013 at 3:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I attended my first surgery as part of my program at med school. I found out that when I see someone's intestines, I vomit. Even if I'm still wearing a surgical mask. There goes the thousands of dollars I spent on college. FML

#20495058
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28969) - you deserved it (6103)

On 02/05/2013 at 10:08pm - health - by A troubled ex med school student - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got so lonely I decided to make sock puppets and play with them. I played for four hours straight, only to be interrupted by a phone call. I didn't answer because my sock puppets were "on a date" and I didn't want to stop playing. FML

#20489987
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31701) - you deserved it (20142)

On 02/02/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by ineedalife (woman) - Australia



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: