About Falkin0113 : Hey guys, I'm Fallon. If you're on here it's probably because of some amazingly smart, and beautifully intelligent comment I made. Or you're just being a stalker, either way its cool. Contact me if you feel like it.
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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, my mom broke the news that my dad secretly got married two months ago, to a woman he has been dating for 15 years, and that my parents have actually been divorced for 12 years. They just lied about it this whole time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55014) - you deserved it (3082)
On 04/12/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by too young for this (woman) - United States
Today, my Romeo and Juliet style relationship hit an all time low when my boyfriend's parents filed a lawsuit against my parents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38181) - you deserved it (3420)
On 04/11/2013 at 8:40pm - love - by Juliet (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50929) - you deserved it (3427)
On 04/11/2013 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)
Today, my racist, homophobic, generally degenerate grandmother visited. Within 20 minutes, she uttered multiple racial slurs, said Robert Downey Jr. will burn in hell for playing a black man in one of his movies, and yelled that she'd "whip the piss" out of me, after I asked her to leave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29868) - you deserved it (2861)
On 04/11/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by no tea parties here, gran (man) - United States
Today, I played Call of Duty with my new flatmate. He continuously lost and was outraged that a girl beat him. It resulted in him shouting at me, claiming that since I'm Muslim, I must be part of the Taliban, which would explain my gaming skills. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38802) - you deserved it (4148)
On 04/11/2013 at 5:11am - misc - by zahra_786 (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my friends and I were exchanging stories with one another. I barely got a few sentences in before they started mocking and viciously insulting me for saying "swaggered", claiming it comes from the slang term "swag", and that they never thought I was a "dumbass hipster". Really now? FML
I agree, your life sucks (27833) - you deserved it (5457)
On 04/09/2013 at 5:04pm - misc - by nice education you've got there (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I found out that my daughter has been stuffing my push-up bras and lipstick into her backpack, putting them on at school, and taking them off before she gets home. She's 9. The only reason I found out is because her teacher reported me to social services. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43027) - you deserved it (3487)
On 04/09/2013 at 4:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40613) - you deserved it (4301)
On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was yelled at while I was shopping by some lady, because she saw my tattoo on my arm. She screamed that I'm the "spawn of Satan" and told me I'm going to hell. It's a fake tattoo of Mickey mouse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33529) - you deserved it (2456)
On 04/09/2013 at 7:05am - misc - by MickyIsEVIL - Japan (Aichi)
Today, while walking to my car after work, I witnessed some moron who was texting while riding her bike running right into my parked car, resulting in a broken side mirror, a damaged windshield, two dents, and for her, a broken phone and nose. She's threatening to sue me for damages. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35385) - you deserved it (1516)
On 04/08/2013 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anon (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, our guest lecturer told us to imagine 25,000 dead koalas in our lecture theatre, and if that didn't make us emotional then we didn't care about them. She then went on a rant, during which she encouraged us to join the "koala army". FML
I agree, your life sucks (26014) - you deserved it (1967)
On 04/08/2013 at 10:08am - work - by save the koalas? uhh - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I shaved my pubic area for my fiancé. He told me it looked "like Frodo tried to hack off Gandalf's beard with Gimli's ax." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32284) - you deserved it (7298)
On 04/08/2013 at 5:17am - intimacy - by dancekat (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while at a hospital, a prayer group circled me and started praying that God and the good doctors and nurses would heal me from the disease that disfigured my face. I was there to visit my sick grandmother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41122) - you deserved it (2825)
On 04/08/2013 at 2:12am - health - by chinatownhobo (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, my 16-year-old son convinced my 14-year-old daughter that she wasn't allowed to use the ladies bathroom at the shopping centre, because she wasn't wearing a dress like the girl on the sign. He told her girls in pants always used the other one. She believed him. This is my legacy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34956) - you deserved it (4505)
On 04/08/2013 at 12:26am - kids - by badparent (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I found out my creepy, obsessive neighbor got a pet hamster and named it after me. He has been telling all sorts of stories about his hamster using my name, and he just told me in detail how it died of heart attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25224) - you deserved it (1198)
On 04/07/2013 at 8:00pm - animals - by idontevenlikehamsters - United States (Virginia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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