Falkin0113

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Offline (the 01/27/2015 at 11:09pm)

Falkin0113

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 23722
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About Falkin0113 : Hey guys, I'm Fallon. If you're on here it's probably because of some amazingly smart, and beautifully intelligent comment I made. Or you're just being a stalker, either way its cool. Contact me if you feel like it.

Falkin0113's page activity

Visits<b>ronzi</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 6:16pm<b>scoobs231</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 9:25pm<b>jad0016</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 6:48am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 6:24pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 8:12am<b>Purrrvana</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:11pm<b>Amdojin</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 12:20am<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 12:52pm<b>1Nsan3</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:59am<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 4:43pm<b>devildog562</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 12:44am<b>JosephAnders</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 8:04pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 5:06pm<b>Flaco78</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 1:20pm<b>differentadi</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 10:10am<b>jack_jill05</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 5:49pm<b>Gundai</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 3:03pm<b>saba_ajira</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 1:38pm

Falkin0113's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of Falkin0113's badges

Falkin0113's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 1:16am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

by WickedRene / 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I got suspended from work after getting caught reading a work-related FML. Irony is funny, but it doesn't pay the bills. FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2014 at 6:38pm / United Kingdom / Work

Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling. I thought this was funny and I teased her a bit. I then slipped in the drool as I was carrying the bacon and she got to enjoy it. FML

by fuckendog / 07/25/2014 at 2:05am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, I asked my class of fifth graders to write down a list of all the compound words they knew. At least four of them put down 'motherfucker'. FML

by Anonymous / 07/23/2014 at 7:16pm / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

by Face fucking palm / 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

by dypshyyt / 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

by Pandamomma / 07/21/2014 at 8:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was browsing the People of Walmart site, chuckling at all the weirdos on there, when I came across a picture of my mom. FML

by Death By Parent / 07/19/2014 at 6:38pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML

by Is that..? / 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I had my third date with a lovely guy. After I got home, I figured I'd try to see if I could find his Facebook profile. I did. His pictures were nice; lovely wedding photos for sure, and his newborn baby is adorable. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2014 at 2:34pm / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Love

Today, I texted my mom asking how she was doing. Apparently she's great, and on her honeymoon. I didn't know she was getting married, or that my parents had just gotten divorced. FML

by morgan_rumm / 07/11/2014 at 4:02pm / Miscellaneous

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2014 at 7:03am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I was stuck on a campus tour with my subtly racist mother who, in an attempt to seem open-minded, deemed it appropriate to refer to our black tour guide as "Sistah". FML

by look how totally not racist I am! / 07/10/2014 at 11:32pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked outside to find my 3 year old daughter and her pet fish playing together on the swings. FML

by Jack00412 / 07/08/2014 at 3:55pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals