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EsotericAura

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EsotericAura

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 August 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2625
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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EsotericAura's page activity

Visits<b>TheSlimeCat</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 2:14am<b>Xero3g</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 2:42am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:08pm

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EsotericAura's favorite FMLs

Today, I was involved in a car accident and hit my head on the dash. I now have huge, very sore knot on my head. My boyfriend now takes every opportunity to poke it and scream "Look! A baby unicorn!" FML

#18280377
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28977) - you deserved it (3743)

On 11/18/2011 at 10:26am - misc - by southernpride93 - United States (Florida)

Today, while working the drive-through at Mcdonald's, I was handing a gentleman his vanilla shake. He responded by popping the cap off, yelling "Fire in the hole!" And throwing it back in. He then quickly drove off. I was covered in vanilla shake. FML

#18279694
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35199) - you deserved it (4739)

On 11/18/2011 at 7:22am - work - by Anothernametaken (man) - United States

Today, my dad and I got into a fight over who gets the last corner piece of the brownies. I ended up with a black eye and and a sprained wrist. He ended up with the brownie and ran away laughing. FML

#18275537
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24613) - you deserved it (6882)

On 11/17/2011 at 7:50pm - misc - by alliez108 - United States

Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML

#18272205
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31546) - you deserved it (4617)

On 11/17/2011 at 11:50am - work - by Chubby - United States

Today, while working in a jail, I had to tell an inmate arrested for domestic violence that no, he could not use his phone call to call me at home. FML

#17892282
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21738) - you deserved it (1878)

On 10/02/2011 at 11:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was on the up escalator, a small woman in front of me farted directly into my face. FML

#17884262
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30000) - you deserved it (2896)

On 10/02/2011 at 2:36am - misc - by Emmy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML

#17874410
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25625) - you deserved it (6084)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, after being in the UK for 2 months, I learned that when saying, "I'm about to blow off and kill someone", to the British "blow off" means "fart." This was pointed out to me in an open-space office after a particularly loud rant. FML

#17861769
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9165) - you deserved it (20123)

On 09/29/2011 at 4:04am - work - by AngerManagement - United Kingdom

Today, the boy I like came to my house with a dozen roses to ask me to homecoming. My uncle chased him down the street with a pitchfork. FML

#17857162
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37631) - you deserved it (2344)

On 09/28/2011 at 5:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mother lectured me about going to the bar too often. She did this while rolling a joint. FML

#17854622
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31021) - you deserved it (5627)

On 09/28/2011 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

#17848518
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46396) - you deserved it (3578)

On 09/27/2011 at 3:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

#17839732
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38082) - you deserved it (3134)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went out with a guy I really liked for the first time. He tried to hold my hands, only to be stopped by my mum, jumping out from nowhere saying "Oh no you don't!" before slapping him. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#17827987
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39765) - you deserved it (3195)

On 09/25/2011 at 6:26am - love - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML

#17817623
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25997) - you deserved it (2498)

On 09/24/2011 at 12:40am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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