Epic_Fail_Sauce

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Epic_Fail_Sauce

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 40958
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Epic_Fail_Sauce : My fave comment ---> OH GOD!!!! My favorite FML thus far...So many possibilities with this one.
-you've created Man-spider ( Spiderman's new arch nemesis)
-the spider will now eat you in your sleep, since you have mated
-the spider might have laid eggs in your dack-hole=new urban legend...
-your next busted nut will consist of baby spiders and not sperm
-your next busted nut will consist of cob-webs
-you are the first man to have made love to a spider=new fetish
-FML from the spider..."After a long day, I was really tired and found a warm home in a sock. I was awakened by an earthquake..which turned out to actually be me getting raped by the biggest cock I have ever seen. FML !!"

Epic_Fail_Sauce's page activity

Visits<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 1:33pm<b>kitkat388</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 11:41pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 2:05pm<b>masterofflight</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 8:17am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:29pm<b>Sanrio90</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 7:27am<b>Tormented28</b> - the 05/15/2009 at 1:13am<b>mrhahn530</b> - the 05/14/2009 at 6:01pm<b>hebda</b> - the 04/30/2009 at 3:14am<b>crazy_chickxoxo</b> - the 04/29/2009 at 4:35pm<b>ILIEKGIRLS</b> - the 04/29/2009 at 2:24am<b>0592635</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 9:17pm<b>username666</b> - the 04/22/2009 at 7:30pm<b>fmlfyl</b> - the 04/22/2009 at 3:39pm<b>jrock94</b> - the 04/21/2009 at 10:12am<b>Talkative1</b> - the 04/06/2009 at 10:46pm<b>crayonwalrus</b> - the 04/04/2009 at 3:01pm<b>lo_chupaaa</b> - the 04/03/2009 at 6:00pm

Epic_Fail_Sauce's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Epic_Fail_Sauce's favorite FMLs

Today, whilst working at Subway, I took an order for 6 footlongs. The entire process took 15 minutes due to the customer's hesitant and glacial pace. When it came to paying, he pulled out his wallet, looked inside, looked at me, and walked quickly out of the store. FML

by matte / 03/30/2009 at 8:16am / Australia (South Australia) / Work

Today, I finally passed a math exam. I go home super excited to tell my mom, yelling "Mom! Guess what!?!?!" She turns to me all happy and goes "You finally got a boyfriend!?!?!?" FML

by wasntme / 03/30/2009 at 6:14am / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my boyfriends house and we were having sex. He has a game on in the background and one of his friends started talking to him. He immediately threw me off and said "I have to answer this." He went over to his computer and started talking to them. FML

by budussy / 03/30/2009 at 5:06am / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was working out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML

by Mark / 03/30/2009 at 3:06am / United States / Love

Today, I volunteered at a nursing home. I approached a lonely, old man who had a type of nervous tick. I went over to speak to him, and not even four sentences into our conversation he says, "I'd really like to make love to you." What I thought was a tick was actually him stroking himself. FML

by Anonymous / 03/30/2009 at 2:10am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked a boy I like to prom by writing all over his car. After nervously sitting by the phone all day, I decided to go out to get lunch. I found the word "No!" written all over my car. FML

by lauren / 03/30/2009 at 1:39am / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML

by Wmsys32pr9 / 03/30/2009 at 1:06am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I was at work, about to go to lunch. There were some girl scouts out front selling cookies. I told my manager that I would be using a different exit, and when he asked why, I told him that girl scouts really annoy the crap out of me. The girl scouts out front were his daughters. FML

by musicman2005 / 03/30/2009 at 12:41am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was fired for "customer dissatisfaction." I work in IT and have never met one of my company's customers. FML

by beat10 / 03/30/2009 at 12:13am / United States (New Hampshire) / Work

Today, I was in my room with the door locked and my mom knocked on the door. I said "don't come in, i'm naked!" She said "That's okay!" so she unlocked the door and walked in. I was masturbating. FML

by Cynical / 03/29/2009 at 11:49pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was masturbating in my room when my dog started to bark obnoxiously. He does this all the time so I ignored it and kept going. This went on for about a half hour. When I went downstairs, I found an open door and an empty TV stand. FML

by trainE / 03/29/2009 at 10:08pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, I developed the disposable camera pictures from my family's trip to Disney World. I noticed that in the pictures I took of them in front of the big castle at Magic Kingdom, my wife and son were standing a few feet away from a man who was touching himself. FML

by Anonymous / 03/29/2009 at 8:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend told the cute waiter it was my birthday. He brought out a dessert with a candle and put a huge sombrero on my head. Everyone at the restaurant started singing me happy birthday. I got embarrassed and put my head down. My sombrero caught on fire. FML

by Hotsauce887 / 03/29/2009 at 5:08pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML

by emkaycutie / 03/29/2009 at 2:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML

by emkaycutie / 03/29/2009 at 2:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous