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Epic_Fail_Sauce

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Epic_Fail_Sauce

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 37372
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Epic_Fail_Sauce : My fave comment ---> OH GOD!!!! My favorite FML thus far...So many possibilities with this one.
-you've created Man-spider ( Spiderman's new arch nemesis)
-the spider will now eat you in your sleep, since you have mated
-the spider might have laid eggs in your dack-hole=new urban legend...
-your next busted nut will consist of baby spiders and not sperm
-your next busted nut will consist of cob-webs
-you are the first man to have made love to a spider=new fetish
-FML from the spider..."After a long day, I was really tired and found a warm home in a sock. I was awakened by an earthquake..which turned out to actually be me getting raped by the biggest cock I have ever seen. FML !!"

Epic_Fail_Sauce's page activity

Visits<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 1:33pm<b>kitkat388</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 11:41pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 2:05pm<b>masterofflight</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 8:17am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:29pm<b>Sanrio90</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 7:27am<b>Tormented28</b> - the 05/15/2009 at 1:13am<b>mrhahn530</b> - the 05/14/2009 at 6:01pm<b>hebda</b> - the 04/30/2009 at 3:14am<b>crazy_chickxoxo</b> - the 04/29/2009 at 4:35pm<b>ILIEKGIRLS</b> - the 04/29/2009 at 2:24am<b>0592635</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 9:17pm<b>username666</b> - the 04/22/2009 at 7:30pm<b>fmlfyl</b> - the 04/22/2009 at 3:39pm<b>jrock94</b> - the 04/21/2009 at 10:12am<b>Talkative1</b> - the 04/06/2009 at 10:46pm<b>crayonwalrus</b> - the 04/04/2009 at 3:01pm<b>lo_chupaaa</b> - the 04/03/2009 at 6:00pm

Epic_Fail_Sauce's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Epic_Fail_Sauce's favorite FMLs

Today, we were swimming in gym class. There are some cute girls in our class and they were wearing their bikinis. I was looking at them when I got an erection but since I was underwater I thought no one would see. I'm on the diving team so my teacher asked me to demonstrate a dive to the class. FML

#742814
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59435) - you deserved it (15470)

On 04/01/2009 at 8:16am - intimacy - by easilyexited (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got up early to prank my family. I put a bucket of ice water on top of a door frame so whoever walked through would get an icy surprise. After I was done, I went back to bed. I woke up groggy and disoriented like always and walked right through the doorway I had rigged. FML

#742417
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15706) - you deserved it (151877)

On 04/01/2009 at 6:42am - misc - by blackvogue (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to the laundromat for the first time. I fit all of my clothes into two washers. Not knowing where to put the soap in, I asked a man doing his laundry, "Excuse me, where do I put the soap in?". He replied, "Ma'am, those are the dryers." FML

#742208
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10922) - you deserved it (74333)

On 04/01/2009 at 5:18am - misc - by esv (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my 8-year-old sister learned how to type her name into a phone using the number key-pad. I later found my phone on the kitchen counter with all my contacts under her name. FML

#740938
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61856) - you deserved it (9128)

On 04/01/2009 at 2:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was on a crowded subway going home. My trousers were a bit dusty so I tried to dust myself off. As I was slapping the side of my leg I missed and hit a woman behind me in the ass. She called me a pervert and walked off. Everyone stared at me. It takes 40 minutes to get home. FML

#740929
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48137) - you deserved it (11460)

On 04/01/2009 at 2:07am - misc - by Thithien1 (man) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, while walking to class enjoying the warmer weather, a bee flew down my shirt. I'm allergic to bees so I freaked out and started ripping my clothes off. By the time I was done, I was half naked and there was no bee in sight. Turns out, it was the string on my jacket hood. FML

#724794
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50702) - you deserved it (30522)

On 03/31/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me "have you been having any intimate relations?" and the first thing that I blurted out was, "you mean with other people?" FML

#722108
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20741) - you deserved it (67251)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend told me how I am too occupied with work for our relationship. Before we had sex I told my friend to call me in ten minutes so I can pretend its my boss and I would throw the phone away to impress her. He called me in ten minutes, but I only lasted five. FML

#717975
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24368) - you deserved it (82485)

On 03/31/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by Alex (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was ringing an old man up in the local grocery store when I had realized all he was buying was 3 bottles of vodka and a box of condoms. While I was loading the bags into his cart he laid his hand on my shoulder and told me "I'd take you home with me but chances are I would be arrested". FML

#711978
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101197) - you deserved it (5265)

On 03/30/2009 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. All of a sudden he jumped off of me, going "shit, shit!". Worried, i asked him what was wrong. He shouted "I forgot to set my TiVO!" FML

#709735
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105477) - you deserved it (7798)

On 03/30/2009 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by Jenny (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at my bosses house for a company BBQ. Earlier I had taken muscle relaxants to calm my lower back pain. After a few drinks it was clear the alcohol and medication did not mix. I woke up few hours later to find out I had stripped naked and jumped into the 4 foot cake before passing out. FML

#706614
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28951) - you deserved it (74612)

On 03/30/2009 at 6:17pm - work - by Donzai (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was hooking up with my girlfriend when her dad knocked on the clear door that leads to the room. About 5 minutes later both of her parents came in to give us the "talk" which included the first time her parents did it. In detail. FML

#705801
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53523) - you deserved it (16676)

On 03/30/2009 at 5:44pm - misc - by talkssuck (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the girl I've had a crush on forever asked me why the pin on my Letterman jacket had two guys doing it. I told her it was for participating in a wrestling tournament. And she responded, "Oh I thought you were finally coming out of the closet!" FML

#703892
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58543) - you deserved it (6271)

On 03/30/2009 at 4:16pm - love - by Seanzy (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom has been calling me every ten minutes, asking me questions about her new computer. She called me at work, and I rudely answered her question. She called back, talked to my boss, saying she was a customer that called in, and I was rude to her. FML

#701960
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78470) - you deserved it (15053)

On 03/30/2009 at 2:08pm - misc - by Tiak (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was going through airport security. As my bags were being scanned, I was told that I was selected for extra searching. Right as the security guard was about to frisk me, he froze up and asked me, "You're a male, right?" I am, and I used to think that it was obvious. FML

#701827
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63915) - you deserved it (4205)

On 03/30/2009 at 1:44pm - misc - by androgynous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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