Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Enslaved

Online | Search for a member

Enslaved

31Liked!

EnslavedEnslaved
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 13465
  • Number of comments : 5970
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Enslaved : Owns a Red Shoe Diary. Wants to be loved, just not by you.

Hello me ... Meet the real me

Open your eyes and see that Life is Beautiful, enjoys Silent Lucidity, and still Rides the Lightning.

Love-Hate-Sex-Pain
It's complicating me sometimes

I took you home
Set you on the glass
I pulled off your wings
Then I laughed

How do I live without the ones I love?
Time still turns the pages of the book it's burned
Place and time always on my mind
I have so much to say but you're so far away

Enslaved's page activity

Visits<b>Acerhawk</b> - 7 hours ago<b>QD</b> - 11 hours ago<b>squirrel13</b> - 18 hours ago<b>buckdharma</b> - 22 hours ago<b>thedeadmen</b> - yesterday at 6:03am<b>Gwen4var</b> - yesterday at 6:04pm<b>aamir251</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 5:57am<b>fbethslife</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 5:42am<b>Sagittariusnow</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 2:05am<b>America123Jeff</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 1:18am<b>amirakun</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 12:40am<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 11:56pm<b>LOVELEIGH2112</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 6:35pm<b>by4x4</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 12:26pm<b>XPhoenixFire</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 10:12am<b>KRAZYKILLAKLOWN</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 9:06am<b>SarahSehhati</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 3:56am<b>thraax</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 11:51pm

Liked!<b>amirakun</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 6:40am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 2:51pm<b>CowboyBebop</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 9:05pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 5:43am<b>ClaireQ123</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 3:22am<b>cjwayy</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 9:34pm<b>MrSassypants</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 9:13pm<b>magnani</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 4:21am<b>hardflip95</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 12:53am<b>sneakybabymaker</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 10:33pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 12:48am<b>ADBurns</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 11:11pm<b>141cohanj</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 5:45am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 1:31pm<b>caterinette</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 4:57pm<b>bubba3412</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 5:57pm<b>williamlittle</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 9:45pm<b>TheOnlyMizLiv</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 7:27pm

Enslaved's FML badges

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of Enslaved's badges

Enslaved's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom asked me if I had any plans to go out tonight. To divert attention, I pretended to be angry and accused her of prying into my social life. Actually, I have no social life and nobody to go out with. My only "big plans" were to finish my Sudoku book. FML

#20023891
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9118) - you deserved it (19850)

On 08/16/2012 at 2:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, it finally clicked in my mind how desperately lonely I am, when I shaved one of my legs just to find out what a woman's leg feels like. FML

#20022524
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23135) - you deserved it (7877)

On 08/15/2012 at 12:46pm - love - by lonely. (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend got a new job. He'll be over the road for three weeks at a time, and home on the remaining week. Basically, I'll see him once a month. Guess which time of month it'll fall on. FML

Today, against my advice, my boyfriend decided to read Fifty Shades of Grey in an attempt to learn how to please me in bed. Now all he does is suck on my toes, and thinks it's weird that I don't spontaneously orgasm as if I'm some kind of nymphomaniacal weirdo. FML

#19979806
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32252) - you deserved it (4772)

On 07/23/2012 at 3:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, some friends told me that my natural body odor smells like cooked beef and roasted onions. I'm disgustingly delicious. FML

#19972809
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18296) - you deserved it (3926)

On 07/22/2012 at 2:34am - health - by hungry? - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my husband and I agreed that he would name our first born and I would name our second. He's dead-set on naming our child "Raindropp" no matter whether it's a boy or girl. FML

#19946274
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24497) - you deserved it (6743)

On 07/16/2012 at 4:57pm - kids - by trisha (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML

#19936728
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19013) - you deserved it (4498)

On 07/14/2012 at 10:43am - health - by Anonymous - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I finally went to the DMV to replace my lost license. After waiting for almost two hours, I casually rummaged through my purse. Something strange inside the lining caught my eye. It was my license. FML

#19932233
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8555) - you deserved it (22541)

On 07/13/2012 at 11:19am - misc - by HellisLikeTheDMV (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my brother had a party with over 60 people in my basement. It turns out that five different couples had sex under the same comforter. The comforter was mine. FML

#19923012
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31383) - you deserved it (2740)

On 07/11/2012 at 9:29am - intimacy - by Sherry - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while looking through pictures of my boyfriend and me on Facebook, I noticed that in practically every single one featuring my best friend, his eyes are directed down her shirt. FML

#19905936
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25071) - you deserved it (3349)

On 07/07/2012 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

#19870672
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50707) - you deserved it (2329)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:48am - health - by Jobby (woman) -

Today, I kindly asked my boyfriend to shave his pubic hair to make oral sex more enjoyable for me. He declined, saying, "Think of it as flossing your teeth. I'm doing you a much needed favor." FML

#19803721
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28620) - you deserved it (5015)

On 06/17/2012 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by turnedoff (woman) - United States

Today, my sister called me and asked if my boyfriend of 3 years had proposed to me yet. And now the surprise is ruined. FML

#19796347
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31171) - you deserved it (2584)

On 06/16/2012 at 9:57am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, I decided not wear makeup for the first time. My boyfriend asked me if I got punched in the face. FML

#19795334
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24466) - you deserved it (5884)

On 06/16/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by Cassidy Bowen - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML

#19783126
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26964) - you deserved it (15772)

On 06/13/2012 at 5:30pm - intimacy - by Steve (man) - United States (Louisiana)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: