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Offline (the 08/22/2014 at 6:23am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 22 December 1988 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10380
  • Number of comments : 833
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About DynamicDave : I'm here to enjoy the wittiness of others and occasionally contribute something worthwhile myself. I'm big on grammar, so I tend to sympathize with grammar nazis. I rarely am one myself, but if the error is particularly egregious I may call someone out.

Also, I generally thumb up buried comments. This is partially due to my passion for free speech and partially due to the fact that I enjoy being a contrarian.

I've also been known to troll every now and then.

If you're on this side of the ground, that makes it a good day! And if life throws you lemons, ask your God (or lack thereof) why they weren't sent instead to some guy on a desert island who is dying, since he's really thirsty and you just had a refreshing beverage a few moments ago.

DynamicDave's page activity

Visits<b>41k312</b> - the 12/03/2016 at 11:59pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 09/16/2016 at 3:12pm<b>CamBamShamDaMan</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 7:46am<b>JulietMarie</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 10:13pm<b>smeegle</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 7:20pm<b>royallymessedup</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 9:10am<b>Benmantha</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 2:43pm<b>SOILEDIT</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 12:47am<b>Olivia93</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 6:10pm<b>ebroks</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 6:15am<b>aron666</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 4:47am<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 4:47am<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 1:38am<b>Dalboz</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 8:52am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 9:48am<b>erica_mae13</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 12:45am<b>EnderHorse</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 11:20am<b>Addiction333</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 6:23pm

Fucked!<b>Olivia93</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 12:11am<b>EnderHorse</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 5:20pm<b>junjunbun</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 2:52am<b>young_cat_lady</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 7:41pm<b>connaughty0225</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 8:26pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 9:55pm<b>kingsolomon6773</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 8:21am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 11:03am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 4:50pm<b>heatherma</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 11:02am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:03am

DynamicDave's FML badges


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of DynamicDave's badges

DynamicDave's favorite FMLs

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

by gir / 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML

by couldntholdit / 07/12/2011 at 1:09pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I had sex with a Juggalo. FML

by Anonymous / 06/06/2011 at 7:20pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went to get a tattoo. I decided on getting my four month daughter's name tattooed on my upper arm. I went home to show my wife. She broke down and told me that I'm most likely not the father. It's a toss-up between her co-worker, the guy who does our lawn, several strangers and me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2011 at 9:43pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for 6 years. Things got heated when we got back to his place, but he had trouble getting the condom on. As soon he got it on, he came. I told him it was ok, I'd help him get hard again. He said, "No thanks. I'm good." FML

by Deidle-dee / 10/26/2010 at 12:37pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was walking down the street when I heard a loud splashing noise to my right. I looked over only to see a woman not squatting but bending over, spreading her cheeks, peeing a horse-sized amount of pee. I can't un-see this. FML

by disturbed / 03/16/2010 at 9:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous