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Durka514

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Durka514

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 97
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Durka514's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Durka514's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
403 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37300) - you deserved it (4010)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, my brother asked if he could borrow my razor, since he recently hit puberty and wanted to have a shave. I decided to be nice and let him. When he returned it half an hour later, I couldn't help but notice his facial hair was untouched. FML

#14329924
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35808) - you deserved it (7378)

On 12/25/2010 at 12:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML

#12826740
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10382) - you deserved it (44918)

On 08/30/2010 at 8:04pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend told me he was showing off pictures of me to co-workers. It wasn't until later that he said, "Don't worry, they were old pictures, from when you were hot." They were from four years ago. FML

#8271296
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23060) - you deserved it (3661)

On 02/14/2010 at 10:09pm - love - by Vgameboi (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom told me she was getting tired of that smell of marijuana in the house. So I confess and tell her I will never bring it home again. She was talking about my neighbors. FML

#4874504
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13017) - you deserved it (61477)

On 08/28/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Dumbweed (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

#4201087
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66983) - you deserved it (15333)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to take a leak, so I went into a porta-john. I noticed another man's hand under the door with a cell phone. Angered, I aimed my stream at his hand and phone. He tilted the porta-john over in response. It was full. FML

#3414555
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44722) - you deserved it (20832)

On 07/02/2009 at 12:13am - misc - by S4L - Sent from mobile version

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

#361047
1250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (668082) - you deserved it (449225)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)



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